Advice needed for a dear friend

[Dairygirl]

I know in the news there has been a lot of going back and fourth on providing care for people who are not born of our country. This has hit home here with a good friend, so let me tell you her story.

My dear friend has been a very good horse friend for a long time. She is from Germany, married a military man, which she divorced and mared a good old country boy. She has been in country for at least 20 years. But never got her citizenship.

2 weeks ago she became very ill. She some how got a hole in her colon and her bowels were leaking in side of her from what the doctors say for at least 3 months. Her body was making little pockets of bowel to keep it from going into her system. 2 weeks ago today one of those pockets busted causing her to be rushed to the charity hospital. They first thought it was a appendix burst. Cleaned her up and put her in CCU.. She went down hill very fast from there. It was touch and go for a week and finally her fever broke and she got better enough to come off of the vent.. Then the doctors starting talking to her, or trying to and found she had hardly no memory at all and she had trouble talking. Well during all of this she had a stroke. Now her doctors are telling her husband that she has a long battle a head of her, not only from loosing a large part of her colon but also now the stroke has added to her problems. Right now they have to keep her tied down because she keeps trying to get up and leave. She is pretty much out of her head and the doctors said it would be a long road with tons of in home health care once she ever leaves the hospital.

They have no insurance and one income, which is her husbands. He missed a whole week of work because the doctors told him to stay at the hospital because they needed him there in case something else came up and he had to give permission.( She had died twice during this week from her body being infected) Now that they are faced with home health care things have gotten much worse on the money end of things.

She isn't a citizen. She is legal. She was going every so often to Houston to renew her papers. What I and a lot of other friends are worried about is what can or will the government do to help? I know some people that are too sick to work are on Social Security but what happens to people who are not citizens? She is from Germany. Do they have a program where she can have medical care and stay with familyhere in the U.S.? I know my words may sound nuts but I'm just worried about the next step when she leaves the Charity hospital.

Her husband is living from day to day and I hate to say he is not looking at the big picture but I know him and he is not planning a head. I would just like to get some advice one way or the other to let him know what is his options to help him a long.

 

[Bess Kelly]

The Charity hospital should have a social services member at, or assigned to, the hospital or that area of the State. They would be able to help guide them to any assistance that may be out there.

 

[Sunny]

I'm so sorry to hear about your friends. They certainly are in a dire situation at the moment.

I've only just started reading up on the health care bill that was passed last night and is about to be signed into law. One of the things that stands out in my mind is that persons with pre-existing conditions will now be able to get insurance. Will that help your friends at all?

Since your friend is there legally, is she not entitled to the same health care as a citizen? What happens to anyone if they don't have insurance and become so terribly ill? Surely they won't denied the care they need, right? You mentioned a Charity Hospital. Are there any other community based organizations that have any financial help available?

Are you sure your friend is not entitled to Social Security? Even if a person is a legal resident (not necessarily a citizen), they are entitled to apply for a social security Number. (I'm just in the process of immigrating to the U.S. myself.) I would think that after 20+ years of living in the U.S., she would have a SSN.

I do hope your friends will be able to get through this extremely difficult time.

 

[Katiean]

Boy that sounds so much like what happened to me. But I went into the hospital at 7:30pm on June 1 and they held me in the ER for 3 days. Surgery was on June 3rd. I have no memory from about 10pm that first night. I didn't come to consciously (I guess I did physically) for about 10 days. When I did come to consciously, I did not make sense for a very long time. I will be willing to bet that if you run your hand through your friends hair, you will end up with a "BIG" handful of hair. Even after I came home I kept asking everyone (even the DR) if I went without oxygen. I knew I was not right in the mental department. I did not have a stroke. What caused all of the craziness (I tried to climb out of bed and go places and athey tell me a lot more) and slow mental ability was the infection from the ruptured bowel. It is a very long hard road to recovery and that is if they stoped all of the bowel leakage. Did they do a colostomy on your friend? There are programs that will help with those supplies. As far as your friend being legal. She is legal as long as she has kept up with renewing her papers. I have a sister in law that is also from Germany that goes to San Fransisco every so often to renew her papers. She has been married to my brother for something like 25 years and what she has is an indefinite green card. I pray they get all of the infection out of your friend so she can recover.

 

[Dairygirl]

OH Katiean, you give me so much hope. I sure hope she comes back 100%. She is into horses big and her dream was to go to the world and ride western pleasure. She just finally bought a show prospect with the right breeding and was so excited about having her dream come true. Her husband is selling all of her horses, including the one that she loves dearly. He has no choice because he needs the money and he can't do it all. It's so sad.

Her husband told me they removed half of her colon and the appendix. They went in 3 times to clean her out before sewing her up. I didn't realize they could leave you open like that. He said that she will at least be in the hospital for 3 months and then she would need 100% care at home. I just hope since she is such a fighter that she can beat this or at least almost beat it. So she can have as much as a normal life as possible.

As far as knowing what our government will do or won't do, I don't know. That is why I posted to see if someone could give me some ideals so I can at least do the leg work for her husband. He is one of those people that live for that day. No real plans. His only plan is as soon as she can leave and live from leaving is to put her in the house and have family members take turns watching her. She will need so much more then a babysitter but I don't think that part is sinking in his head.

I know that she has never worked other then training horses and she didn't claim that on taxes. I'll ask Jamie about the SS# to see if she does have one of those.

 

[Dairygirl]

Sunny, The charity hospital we have in our local city is state. It is where everyone goes that doesn't have insurance to get medical treatment. You pay on what your income is at the time of service. Any person can go, no matter if your a citizen or not. She had went there 3 days before with stomach pains. They told her it was probably female issues and to come back the next Friday for bloodwork. Give her Vicodin and sent her home. If they would have done the bloodwork that day they could have prevented this, in my opinion.

I'm just worried about what comes after the hospital.

 

[Katiean]

Yes most definitely it could have been much less if they would have done something the first day. Your friends husband may look at a failure to treat with an attorney. Here they left me lay in the ER for 3 days. When they opened me up there was so much infection that the DR could not determine what was what. He put in kidney stints so he wouldn't cut anything vital. They literally lifted my intestines out and hosed them off. Twice according to the DR. If they took so much of her collin then she must have a colostomy. If she does, have her husband get the hospital to set her up with a company called "HOLLISTER". They have the best colostomy supplies. They will send at no charge through a jump start program 5 skin barriers a month. You can sometimes get the deodorant too. The skin barrier looks like a fabric curad band aid with a plastic ring to snap the bag to. I think they will also send you the reusable bags. The problem is I would not use reusable bags and My sister paid $100 a month for me to have the closed one time use bags. If your friend gets on with Hollister I have a few bags left that I can send her. Keep us posted on how she is.

 

[Dairygirl]

So far she is still the same. Doesn't know a lot and keeps trying to get out of bed and leave. They are suppose to start her on liquids and start letting her move around the room a little and then right back in bed. I'm going to go with her husband to visit on Thursday and I'm going to help him locate someone who might can tell him what the next move is once she leaves the hospital. Thanks for the advice with Hollister, Katiean. I'll write that info down to keep.

 

[Shortpig]

As far as the SSN ask him if he has been claiming her on his income tax returns. Can't do that without a SSN. She might be entitled thru his SS to claim a disability. They really need to jump on it quick because she has to be fully disabled for 6mos and unable to perform any work for that length of time to get it approved.

I sure hope she is able to recover from this. I wish your friends the very best. I don't know how this new healthcare program will affect legals but not citizens. I haven't looked into it yet.

Next question is he a veteran? If yes he should see if there is any assistance available there also.

Marie

 

[Dairygirl]

Thanks so much for the kind words. I sure hope she gets better too. She is the reason I started showing in the first place. We had our first show of the year last Sunday and it was so odd not to have her there. It's like I kept waiting for her to come around the stalls and it was strange.

I do have a UPDATE on the medical expenses and on my friend.

She is still the same. Not any better but not worse either. She has pretty much no memory. She tries to talk but really doesn't understand you or anything like that. They tried to get her up to walk but she couldn't. she can move her legs around but isn't strong enough to hold her weight just yet. The doctors told her husband that she was pretty much nursing home bound and he believed that she would stay that way. I sure hope they are wrong. she is only 39 years old.

The state has given her Medicad to pay expenses but they told him she wasn't able to get the Social Security. The Doctor had to get involved to get the Medicad started for her. At least she has that now so she can get the care she needs.