Bullying problem

[wade3504]

Police were called and came over today. The boys were out last night and we ended up with dog feces on our door last night. They also skipped school today as they were "sick" (one's dad called in for him), and now a package that the stupid maiman left at our door has been stolen. We have also contacted the leasing agent of the complex and they know exaclty who we are talkng about as they have had multiple problems with them. They supposedly have a zero tolerance policy for this sort of thing but yet they are still here. We have given them the case number from the police so they know we'vve contacted them and we told them we were doing so. They also suggested it.

The officer went over and talked to the boy and his mother. The boy admits to the spitting but denies everything else and his mother believes him. She can't understand why the cops are now invovled. The police officer is certain the boy is lying to him. This boy told him he was doing it as he wants Becca as a "girlfriend" and Becca isn't interested. She was friends with him but that was it.

My mother in law tried the cookies and talking thinking it would be over after that. It isn't. They got cookies and we got property stolen and dog feces on our door. We are now waiting to see what comes next. We do not think it is over. We are telling Becca's teacher's that she is not allowed to go anywhere alone at school. I am picking them up.

The only reason we think he hasn't done anything else to Becca is because he hasn't had the chance to do so. One of us is always with her.

So, that is what is happening right now. I can hope that it ends here but I am not holding my breath.

 

[fourluckyhorseshoes]

Sounds like a rough situation. I don't have any advice, but I will be praying for your family's safety, resolution of the problem, and justice for the guilty.

 

[Sue_C.]

If you could prove that he took the package from your mailbox, something could at least be done about that...as it is a Federal Offense.

I didn't think a nice little chat and a plate of cookies was going to change this situation; sometimes it sucks to be right.

This is so unfair that it is your daughter that is on lock-down because of this situation, instead of the one responsible.

We have also contacted the leasing agent of the complex and they know exactly who we are talking about as they have had multiple problems with them. They supposedly have a zero tolerance policy for this sort of thing but yet they are still here. We have given them the case number from the police so they know we've contacted them and we told them we were doing so.

I wonder how fast they might move on this if you mention what will happen to them should someone be hurt. Sometimes it takes a hint about hitting the pocket-book before a move is made.

 

[Sonya]

Didn't the little &*it admit to the principal that he touched Becca (grabbing her breast)..that should be on record. You have done everything you can, you tried to keep it nice, but oviously that didn't work...this little SOB is a problem...not only to Becca but to society, it's time to get serious...stick to your guns, report EVERYTHING. Sending good thoughts, I know you are doing the best you can..hugs.

 

[hobbyhorse23]

That's awful. I'm so sorry your daughter is going through this!

Leia

 

[sfmini]

I am so sorry to hear you are going through this, poor kid has to be treated like a prisoner for her own safety.

Also feel sorry for those boys if they don't get the help they need their lives will not end up going well at all.

I think it is a good thing you are taking her to martial arts training, that will arm her for life.

 

[Marty]

Ok no more mrs nice guy, they crossed the line too many times now and have had too many chances to play nice. Because stealing your mail is a Federal Offense I would milk this opportunity like a cow to report it to your Post Office and then see what develops legally.

 

[Taylor Richelle]

I still can't believe the stuff you are going through! I just hope you find a resolution to all this soon.

 

[wade3504]

We can't prove he took the package so right now we can't get him for anything. We are pretty sure it was them though as they were skipping school the day it was delivered. Last week when we had packages delivered and they were at school the packages were still sitting at our door. He's very sneaky so we have to catch him in the act but when he stays up later than we do that is difficult. My husband called the post office today and told them not to leave anything else at our door. They should know already but now hopefully they won't. UPS and Fedex won't do it so the only problem we have is the post office.

Becca is allowed outside but I go with her. I pick them up from school as they both walk and he could have contact with her. I feel bad though as I don't want the kids to make fun of her because she needs a babysiter.

We will be calling the police for anything and everything else that happens. We know the main boy that is part of all this has gotten in trouble with our apartment complex already and the woman we talked to says she's going to get the property manager in on it now. I guess it's a three strikes and you're out type of thing. We will keep pushing them for action.

I will keep you updated. I took her to the doctor today as her stomach has been bothering her. The doc thinks it's because of what is going on as there is nothing else wrong with her. So we now have that too.

 

[chandab]

I hope you can get this resolved soon and get back to a normal life.

I took her to the doctor today as her stomach has been bothering her. The doc thinks it's because of what is going on as there is nothing else wrong with her. So we now have that too.

You don't suppose its ulcers brought on by stress, do you? I know it sounds strange, as we talk frequently about horses getting ulcers from stress, but people do too.

 

[Wee Mite Miniatures]

Is it possible to set up a monitoring camera so you can see if they are around your front door? Nothing like getting the evidence recorded.

Set it up so you are taking pictures through a window so they can not steal the camera. Place a nice wreath on your door for the holidays and watch it disappear.

 

[michele80906]

I am sorry you and your daughter are going thru this. I have been reading this post with growing concern. Even though I don't know you personally, I feel your pain and feel angry at parents who defend their wayward kids to the end and never admit they and their kid have a problem. Consider putting up a hidden camera on your door step. These are relatively cheap and would sure go a long way in proving your case against these little hoodlums. Michele

 

[wade3504]

I am going to try to figure out a way to record out front door but we have no windows by it. There are no windows on that side of the apartment. We have the laundry room, front hall, and my kids room on that side of the apartment but there is only a solid wall in their room on that side of the house. I've considered hiding a small camera in the bushes facing the window but it would have to be really small or that would be stolen too.

Chanda, the doctore thinks her stomach problems have to do with what is going on with this kid but isn't to the point yet of saying it's ulcers. She's eating soft food and on pedialyte right now as she has diarrhea from it. I am to call him today and let him know how she is doing. I will be back to see him as well as I have an infection on the bottom of my foot and have to have x rays as they think there is some kind of foreign body in there. He wants me to stay off of it as much as possible for ten days. I work at a preschool and have two kids so that's pretty funny. I will be on crutches now in order to do that. All I can say right now is when it rains it pours.

 

[Wee Mite Miniatures]

If you have a two story building you can mount it high enough that they can not reach it.

If they know it is there they will stay aways. It does not solve the problem of them bothering your daughter but if you can prove other problems you may be able to get them to move out.

A friend had this problem with his daughter. He went to court and was granted a restraining ordered. This meant even INSIDE the school the offenders had to stay at least 100 feet away from his daughter. The school was forced to enforce the restraining order even if it meant changing the classes the offenders were in.

 

[wade3504]

Well, the boy who started this all has to move now because of what has been going on. So that is great. The bad thing is that his friend's are now angry. Becca and my son walked out the door about 30 seconds before I did this afternoon to walk the dogs and he was out with two of his friends. One of his friends had a bat and ran after her threatening to kill her. The police are on the way again. This boy does not live in the complex but in a house farther back in this gated community. They ran and haven't come back to the playground yet but we have his name and the development he lives in. The police will call the school to get his address. They just came and thy are out looking for him. If they can't find him we are to find out if he is at school we are to call the police and they will go and talk to him there. I have also just found out that this kid is IN HER CLASS. Time for the restraining orders. My daughter has also told me this afternoon that she is having bad dreams every night about the original boy hurting her so her stomach being messed up I am now sure is from ulcers/stress.

They found all three involved and talked to them. All that happened was that they talked to them again and put them in the police car the other day to let them know what it was like. The main boy was put in handcuffs the other day so he could see what that was like. The officer told them that they were responsible for Becca now, that if anything happened to her no matter who it was they were coming after them so they better make sure nothing happens to her. The one with the bat originally said he didn't do it and didn't even have a bat then messed up and said he was just playing the second time they talked to him.

Now what I don't get is that a baseball bat is considered a lethal weapon and he ran at her with it yelling "I'm going to kill you." and yet they still were only talked to and that was it. We were told that we now can protect our daughter in any way necessary short of shootint them but I can see us being haulad off to jail for that. So this is a different officer from before. He thinks it's over just like the first two days ago. They apologized yet again at the officer's urging. He has the parent's phone numbers but has not spoken to them yet. So the drama continues.

 

[SampleMM]

Oh my, I am so sorry that this is escalating but unfortunately that's the way these things usually play out. You know what's best for your family, but at this point I would be switching schools and moving elsewhere. How horrible that your family has to keep going through this.

 

[Miniv]

With all the records that must now be on file with this harassment, and with your daughter's health.... I'd be informing the District Attorney's office that you are keeping records of all this and if nothing is done, the parents of these delinquents are going to SUED for harassment and Becca's medical bills!

This is STUPID.

PS: The original delinquent who actually laid hands on your daughter should have been charged for sexual assault, imo.

 

[minih]

I'm sorry you are getting no help. How very sad. If it were me and any way possible I would move. Not worth risking my daughter's health or life. These people all sound unstable and mean, and you are getting no response to your cries for help.

 

[wade3504]

We hear that the latest attack has happened because the original boy has to move because of all the trouble that he has caused here. We have not been told that specifically though. This boy is telling his friends that. If that is true, which I am going to the leasing office tomorrow about, then he will be gone by the end of the month. If he is gone then his friends will be too as they come to this apartment complex to hang out with him. We are going to the school on Monday to have the boy who went after her today removed from the class they share and we are looking into restraining orders. We are also going to demand that they let my children stay in the office and I will pick them up from there. If we were to move she would still go to the same school as we have to be close enough to my husband's work where he can walk or ride his bike and that will be in the same school system. I won't pull her out of her school right now as she has a safety patrol trip to Washington DC in January that she has been looking forward to for forever and she's rooming wit 3 girls from her school. One being her best friend. I won't upset her more by telling her she can't go.

I do understand now why alot of people don't have any respect for police officers anymore. They've been out twice and threatened to take these boys to jail but nothing has happened. We will continue calling as I'm sure we all know now that this isn't going to stop, at least until he moves, but we don't see it as doind any good. Just a waste of time.

So, these boys have learned that police don't really do anything and my daughter has learned the same. We are continueing to urge her to tell us anytime anything happens but I don't know how long that is going to last. I got her a book to read on bullying written for young girls that she is reading so I hope that helps as well. She was reading it this evening before she went to her grandmother's house.