Hi, to all my friends! I Miss You!

[DebiM]

I don't really know how to start.... I love my horses and especially love foaling season and watching the horses I've sold in the Show Ring. But after my husband David died in 2006 I slowly moved toward a Nervous Breakdown. Then my Fibromyalgia worsened, my nerves were shot and I started having serious complications from a mesh implant. I knew I couldn't take care of them alone anymore.

In 2009 I started a complete sale of my herd of 49 horsees. I thought I was doing fairly well until I lost one of my best friends and right hand man due to Alzheimers. That man was my Daddy and I moved him in with us to care for. He died in our living room in April of 2010. Three weeks later My Aunt, his sister, suddenly died then a month after that my cousin was killed in a car wreck. I am ashamed to say after that I didn't do my responsibility of getting the papers done on the horses I still had or the ones I'd already sold. To those people I deeply apologize. One special lady who was very good to me when David died had to sell a foal unregistered because I didn't get the stud report to her. I'm so sorry, Mary.

I don't mean it as a excuse but all the medications I have to take including for pain, chronic depression and anxiety make it difficult to think clear sometimes. It's time for me to let all the rest of the horses go and for me to move on with my life.

I can't tell you how much I will miss them but it's best for both of us. I hurt so badly everyday after feeding that I just cry. No pity party, just the truth as I'm trying to explain things and apologize to those I owe it to. I've always touched every one of my horses daily, even when I had 50!, and I can't do that now. They deserve that loving touch..

Again, I'm sorry to the four people who had to work with me so long to get their papers straight. You longtimers know that before David's death that was not like me.

Mary Lou & Mona, I've enjoyed this site so much over the years. I started out in the 90s when all we had was the old fashioned message board. I've always appreciated the hard work you've both done---"Mary Lou, you've come a long way baby".

Debi Antley Murphy

[email protected]

318-331-2552

 

[rimmerpaints]

Aww i teared up reading this. I dont know you but my heart goes out to you.

 

[supaspot]

what a terrible time youre having , some people seem to get more than their fair share of lifes troubles , hang on in there it will get better

 

[DebiM]

Thank both of you. I remember before David was killed us talking abt how truly blessed we were. I have to say that I'm not complaining because it could be worse. I have two beautiful children and two gorgeous granddaughters. The Lord gave me those beautiful girls after David's death. I know they were gifts but still wish he could have seen them. Times are going to get better because they say he doesn't give you more than you can handle.... I'm full up now so surely the bad times are over.

 

[Genie]

I hope things turn around for you now. Sounds like you got more than your share. Good luck selling your horses, things are pretty slow it seems around here.

 

[vickie gee]

I do not know you but I am convinced you speak from the heart and wish you well. You have certainly have your share of tribulations. I could write a book on tribulations that I have survived but let me just simply tell you to COUNT IT AS JOY. I get the impression that is where you are headed if you are not already there. No doubt you are familiar with this equation even if you do not know the origin of it:

TRIBULATION> PERSERVERANCE> CHARACTER> HOPE=FAITH, JOY, PEACE

ROMANS 5:1-5 Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. And not only that , but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance, character; and character hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

May you be abundantly be blessed with faith, joy, and peace.

 

[REO]

{{{{{{Deb}}}}}}

Hang in there!

 

[Marty]

Dear Sweet DEBI OMG when I saw this I had to come out of under my rock and tell you how good it is to "see" you again. I surely miss the times back in the day of 7 Acres and also and will never forget how great you were to pull tricks on! Teresa still calls me about once a year to touch base. I do so understand everything you have gone through and the road you have traveled; I will never understand why bad things always seem to happen to good people but they do. I'm sorry for the journey you've been put through. I also know how important it is to move forward when you feel the timing is there. David will always be closer than you realize and for sure, he's watching his grandbabies every day. Much love to you always my friend.

 

[Mona]

Hi Debi. Glad you stopped to check in on us all here. Was great to hear from you again! I was just thinking of you and Beth not long ago, remembering the time we met and your trip from Heck! Glad things are starting to look up for you and hope they continue to do so. Hang in there Debi!! (((HUGS)))

 

[DebiM]

Oh to my dear friends Reo Robin the Heifer, Mona (lol, you said that mildly abt that trip girl!), Marty and those of you I also don't know.........your special. I promise to check in more often when my horses sell. Christy believes that when I get down to 4 or 5 I won't be able to let go. I explained I was trying to sell them all at once so that won't happen......

Marty, I know what your loss was shortly before David. Your post brought tears to my eyes and I thank you for coming out from under that rock.

Right before Thanksgiving this year I was in bad shape. 5 years later I was still crying for Dave. He loved the horses and helped on foal watch. Christy was praying one day while driving and really worried abt me. Out of the blue she said "Daddy, you have to help me. What are we going to do abt Mama. For 32 years you took Care of her and I'm trying but not doing too well." Christy told me that she heard her Daddy very clearly tell her she had done good. But that it was now time for me to move on and get back to living & fun like we used to. He said tell her to take the next step. I was totally blown away!! So on December 20th I married my boyfriend and can feel my insides finally trying to work with me along with my meds. Thank goodness Christy didn't tell Dave abt the tin on my fridge that said I used to care but now I take a pill for that!

 

[StarRidgeAcres]

{{{{{Hugs to you}}}}}

 

[horsehug]

Debi, It is so good to see you on here and I pray for nothing but the best for you after all the things you have endured.

Susan O.

 

[DebiM]

Hi, Mary Lou,

I forgot to thank you for all that Mona, you and other members did for me during the months after David's death. I don't think I could have made it financially without all of you and the members of my board. On 7Acres board they each adopted one of my horses sending what they could monthly for their care. With ya'lls auction and contibutions from David's coworkers we were able to have money for Christy's care and my expenses at MD Anderson which was the month after David's accident. Then we were able to pay our bills until his insurance came in. There will NEVER be words to describe the love and appreciation I had for you guys.

Susan, GREAT to hear from you my friend. I'll be on here and the sales board more after I post my ad. But after that I wish you and my friends here would email me so I can keep in touch. My new email is [email protected]. Have you heard anything on how our Brushfire is?

Love to you all.

 

[Barbie]

Debi-

So glad to "see" you on here. I'm glad things are going better for you and you are "taking the next step". I know David would want you to. You are doing what you have to do - like Christy, I'm thinking it may be hard when you get down to the last few to let them go.

((((HUGS))))

Barbie

 

[DebiM]

Good to "see" you as well, Barbie. I hope you guys are wrong but I'm so thinking you might be right. Christy and Gary want me to go ahead and pull abt 4 horses out to keep then reduce the price of the herd when I finally get around to posting. Rocket Man, one of the blk/wh studs, was born on the night of David's viewing. David had been watching Emily & Natalie for two weeks while we were going back and forth to MD Anderson for all the presurgery stuff on Christy. I took over when we returned on Thursday then the accident was on Sunday. So everyone around the house watched her while we were making preps and such but no one wanted to stay home the night of the viewing. I had never had a horse born without someone being there but just wasn't thinking. When we all got home ( all David and my nieces and nephews in addition to some of Cody's friends were staying at the house) Cody and I pulled around back to kinda decompress before going inside. Someone had turned the cam off the night of David's death so she wasn't online & they had turned her out with the other PG and mares with new babies. Anyway our headlights were pointed into the newborn pasture. We'd been talked a few minutes when Cody asked me if I'd seen Emily. I looked and said she's not out there. We both got out of the car and took off running. After a couple of minutes I heard Cody hollering from the barn. I just knew it was bad but when I got in there I saw Emily with her pretty little baby. Cody went to the house telling everyone as I was holding the baby and of course crying! They started cleaning and preparing another stall for her then Christy said she couldn't find the bag or after birth. We never found it so of course all the young ones decided David had delivered him! I don't know what I think but we named him Rocket Man cause it was the fourth of July and David shot off fireworks anytime we had a Holiday. Well after that long story of course they want Rocket to be one of those four in addition to Baby Doll who was born a few days after the funeral. We had the cam back on then & Mama was watching it. Right before the monitor went off someone called from Australia that she was foaling. Mama woke me and I ran then helped Natalie deliver in my JAMMIES not thinking abt the cam......until someone sent me a pic of myself! LOL Natalie was one of the horses we lost in Point after a dog or coyote attack. Four foals were killed in addition to Nat but she saved her baby!

Sorry so long but all you old members have to remember how much I loved telling stories and boy do I have some I could tell you now!

Debi

 

[LindaL]

Hi Debi! Glad to see you've come on here to see us all! Sorry you have had so many things happen in such a short time frame...but sounds like your life is starting to be on a positive upswing! Congrats on your recent wedding!

Don't know if you remember when I dispersed my small herd back in '04, but back in '09 I bought a new horse, which has now turned into 16! lol I think the advice about keeping a few is a good one. It's just too hard to be totally horseless!

Hope you will come back and visit occasionally.

 

[lvponies]

After all the issues in my personal life, I convinced myself that I could not take care of my small herd of minis alone. I found homes for them all. I tried and tried to bury the hole of sorrow they left, but you know minis, they always poked their dear little noses out!! I made it 4 years and have only very recently purchased my first mini. He's not here yet, but will be in a few weeks. My every thought it consumed with excitement for when he'll be here!! Even though I'd love to bring back my favorites from my original herd, I can't. I've asked to repurchase one favorite mare from a friend, but the others are gone and will not return. So...I encourage you to pick out some favorites. Once you're down to that 3, 4, 5...keep them for awhile and just see.....can you let them go and not mourn them? If so, you can then sell them, but if not, it's not too late to hang onto them.

 

[DebiM]

Linda, I do remember and haven't been on to see that your are now starting a new herd.

Kim & Linda, very good advice to me. I may just keep back 4 or 5 of my sentimental favorites then wait and see what happens. I also understand abt those favs. 4 of mine were sold in 2010.

Thank u guys!

Debi

 

[Barbie]

I remember reading about Rocket Man when he was born and I do think David had something to do with his safe birth. I definitely think the two you mentioned, Rocket Man and Baby Doll, should be 2 of the few you hang on to if that is what you decide to do.

Barbie

 

[DebiM]

Oh sweet, Barbie, those were some horrible days but some amazing things happened during them. You reminded me of when Emily herself was born. Her dam Lilly had been on constant foal watch for two weeks. She was one who would just go til she couldn't go anymore then drop. One year she went for over a week with a 5 on the strips. Anyway, she was bred to a blk/wh stud and I so wanted a blk/wh filly out of her to keep. I would put the monitor on Dave's nightstand then go to bed a couple of hours before he got up and he'd watch til going to work. Right before he left he woke Christy to watch. One morning I couldn't sleep and went back to the monitor to look at her. He was innocently drinking coffee at the snake bar. I went over to the monitor in the kitchen to check Lilly............there right in the middle was a pretty little blk/wh foal........ drawn and taped on the screen by the jokster David!!!! Little snit I could have killed him. But got him back a couple of days later when he got up. David got his coffee then went to ck the monitor. I had come out of the office and just watched him trying to decifer if that really was a blk/wh foal he was watching run around the stall. It was so funny to see him rub his eyes, look back at the monitor then get real close. Without looking away he said a few choice words then said Sex? I said filly. He said, "No S***, then took off to the barn. Oh it was so funny after the trick he tried to play on me.

Now, Gary is a different story. It's like, oh she's foaling...I'm going to the house.......Hey, so and so is foaling... Let me know on the radio if I need to call the vet!