How do you no when a mare has finished grieving

[Willow Glen]

HI I was just wondering about how ya no for sure when a mare has finished grieving, My Lottie had a dead foal on wednesday night it is now friday night and she has been standing with her baby the hole time not moving away but today I noticed that she has been leavng the dead foal and eating and hanging out with her frend another mare and the only tme she go's up to it is if we go in or the other mare gets to close to wear the baby is, She dosent seem to worryed now dus this mean she has finished her grieving I dont want to take the baby away to soon I thought it would take longer than this before she felt ok to leave it but to me it looks like she is dun with the foal and has realised t isnt going to get up, So what do you guys think?

 

[AnnaC]

I read about you losing the foal on another thread, so sorry for you and your little mare. In my experience every mare is different. We have had some lose interest in a few days, but one took 10 days! With our set up the mares are all in at night over the foaling time and out in the day. We move the foal and mare to and fro from stable to field on a daily basis, until the mare spends all day with her friends and does not return to the foal. That night mare and foal come back into the stable, but the next morning the mare goes out alone. If she then appears totally unbothered about leaving the foal, the foal is removed from the stable before the mare returns in the evening. If all is quiet overnight, the foal is then 'disposed' of.

Hope this helps - good luck.

Anna

 

[wiccanz]

I'm with Anna C on this. Two years ago, 1 of my mares had a colt who broke his leg before he was 48 hours old. It wasn't easily fixable, so the decision was made to put him to sleep. The mare spent a couple of days beside the foal, and then all of a sudden, she just walked off and left it. That was when we removed him and buried him. She had absolutely no problems after that.

 

[Jill]

I am sorry about the foal.

So far, none of my mares have lost foals (but I've only had two born to date). However, a friend of mine has had some losses and I remember how heart breaking it was.

Once, I remember an elderly broodmare lost her colt during delivery and he was taken away immediately and burried. She was a mare that wasn't people oriented but that evening, she was desperate and kept knickering to us when we were feeding. I know she was asking us to give her back her baby. It was heart breaking

If the mare were mine, I would watch and when she was away from the dead foal, I would then go and get the foal and bury it. I'm thinking it's not healthy (physically) to leave the dead body there much longer and by now, she understands the baby is not alive.

Additionally, from what I have seen in my friend's mares, if the mare has had live foals before, she will probably grieve more deeply than if she's never had a live foal. But, either way, I do think I would be removing the foal asap at this time.

 

[rabbitsfizz]

So sorry about the foal.

I have never left a foal with a mare- as soon as it is born, if I know it is dead, that is, I have it out the door and away.

The maser gets up, calls a bit and is settled in an hour or so.

When she is turned back out she calls a bit at first then settles in with the mares as normal.

If she has lost a foal - I had an Arab mare's foal break a leg one time- I take the mare out, have the foal euthanized, take the foal out and put the mare back in.

She can smell the foal, and she calls for a couple of hours, then, again, she settles.

I had not heard of leaving a foal with a mare- I would never do it.

JMO- it is done, in your case.

I would advise taking the mare in, moving the foal, and then seeing if the mare returns to the foal or just calls around where it was and moves on- she sounds as if she needs a bit of help to make the decision, to me.

 

[Reble]

I agree with rabbitsfizz, would never do that.

Everyone, and every animal will grieve different. Who really knows what is best.

 

[lvponies]

I've lost a couple of foals over the years. The longest I've ever left the foal with the mare is maybe a couple of hours in a stall. I have then rubbed the foal with a towel to get it's scent on the towel, removed the foal and left the towel with the mare. I think it's time to remove your little filly to allow the mare to move on. It's not healthy for her to spend the majority of the time guarding/standing over her dead filly. She may be upset at first, but she will settle down. {{{HUGS}}}

 

[ChrystalPaths]

If you can, bury him now and right there would be fine but deep enough, her grief will abate when she can no longer smell, see and feel him. Again so sorry for both your pain. I think you've just left him with her a bit too long is all, no real harm but it does prolonging her grief and feelings of emptiness.

 

[Danielle_E.]

I can only go by my experiences. I mentioned to you that I lost the very first foal born at our place a few years ago. The mare, a maiden at the time, did not show any signs of being upset. The foal we lost this past summer, Crystal's foal (our other mare) was a whole different story, she was not a maiden mare. Crystal was EXTREMELY upset and it broke my heart. She refused to come out of her stall without the foal, as I wanted to give Crystal a bath. I ended up having to take the baby with us (in a wheelbarrow) in order to get Crystal to stay calm and come with me. It was GUT WRENCHING to watch her licking the baby's face, I am sure trying to get the little one to "get up". I left Crystal to graze with the baby in the wheelbarrow for about 8 hours, as I recall. I then brought her back into the barn (momma and baby) and left them for another few hours. I went back out to the barn and walked in and said "Crystal, it's time...." and walked her out of the stall and put her back with the herd. At that point she was okay, she called a few times but wasn't agitated like she was in the morning. I was very lucky to speak to Bonnie Fogg, our animal communicator here. Some of you are believers here others are not and that is fine. All I know is after I spoke with Bonnie on the phone around noon time, Crystal calmed down 100%. I also felt more at peace, at least I could stop crying.

At this point you mare must already realize that her foal is not alive and if I were you I would remove the wee one.

Hugs to you and your mare.

 

[MBhorses]

so sorry for your loss. my prayers are with your poor mare and your family.

 

[StellaLenoir]

I personaly have never lost a foal. But when we were looking at minis, one of the farms we went to, was a big mini farm and an old time mini farmer.

He took us all around his beautiful big farm. When we went to see one group in their pasture, you could see all the mamas and babies. In the distance was a mare, with a baby laying down. You could tell it was dead. She stood next to her baby, when he called all the horses in for us to meet, she stayed. And all the other horses, mares and foals stopped by this one mare and her dead baby to greet it before coming in. They all sniffed it and her and stayed a moment and then came in. It was the most heartbreaking thing to see, yet it was also beautiful to see the love ALL the horses in this herd had for this baby.

This farmer said he leaves the mare and foal untill she willingly walks away, than he buries it.

To me, you are doing the right thing leaving the baby. Obviously these horses love, and grieve, and your mare will leave her baby when she is ready. Good luck and I am so sorry for your loss. I hope your mare feels better soon.

 

[Miniv]

I'm very sorry for the loss of your foal......and it's always harder when the mare grieves.

We use the towel technique that was mentioned. The longest we've left the foal is over night. After that when the mare's attention is on something (like food) we slip the foal away and leave the towel.

MA

 

[RobinRTrueJoy]

I usually leave the foal with the mare for about 12 hours along with the towels that I used to dry and rub the foal, then I remove the foal. I leave the towels with her and it helps a lot. The next day I remove the towels. But not all of the mares are the same.

One time I tried to do what I said and the mare nearly tore the stall down... then I put here out in the barn yard and she almost tore down the fence. So I finally took her over to where I dug the grave. She stood there as I put the foal into the ground and covered it up. Then we walked away together and she never carried on again. It was very touching, she totally accepted what I had done. NON animal people just do not get it that animals FEEL emotions.

I am very sorry for your loss.

 

[Miniv]

Robin,

That was a beautiful thing you did for your mare. I often feel that our mares think we are the "bad guys" who steal their babies because they don't understand what's happening. What you did SHOWED her and she obviously understood.

MA

 

[Willow Glen]

Hi thanks so much guys I will be removing the foal today (well I'm gunna get my dad to cum do it) She isnt paying any attention to it this morning so it is time thank you all so much for your support and advice it is very much appreciated.

 

[iluvwalkers]

[SIZE=12pt]when my mini donkey lost her foal, I had a reading done to see if she wanted to live (bad delivery) anyway, I was told that Petunia was calling because she wanted to know where her baby was, she told me that animals don't greive like we do, and they are o.k with death. the person doing the reading told me she told Petunia what had happened and she said Petunia was fine with it, just was confused where the foal was. I would like to think this is true as it makes it a little easier to see a calling mother

...sorry if this is off topic a little, Nikki [/SIZE]

 

[Tammie-C_Spots]

I'm sorry to hear of the loss of your foal and the many others that were mentioned. I've lost some myself in the past.

If the foal doesn't make it I will leave the foal about 3-4 hours with her then I take it away and bury it. I don't like to leave the foal if other horses could have access because if the foal died of a germ and it may be contagious I don't want that passed around. I've found that if you just leave the foal where it was born for a short time then take it away and bury it that is best in my experience. Moving the foal around can give the mare the impression it's alive. I had one mare that her foal died right after birth- the foal was alive long enough for the first "hehehe" sniffing bond to happen so she was quite upset when the foal would not get up. I left her with the baby and she quietly stood by the filly for 5 hours. That's the longest I've left one with the mother. The mom was quiet until she saw the baby move when I went to put it on a tarp. She got very anxious and calling to the baby and kept that up for almost an hour. She still looked for the baby and called for a few days.

I think in general if you can put the mare out with a friend or group with some distraction (pasture, hay) as quick as possible after a loss that is best. In my experience it can be a few days or weeks to see them get back to "normal" after grieving. It's a very sad thing.

Tammie

 

[Willow Glen]

Well all done with the burial and it makes me feel better not having to see the foal. it was so cute my little girl sang a song for lottie and the foal so cute.Then she turned to me and said "next time mum Lottie will have a real baby for me to play with and for you to show how bout tomorrw can she do it then" haha I wish, she is such a little darling.