As you know in 2006 I lost my son in the most violent way. My life was gone as well. All I had left to hold onto besides my younger son Daniel was my German Shepherd Tracey. I had my hands full with Daniel's problems and subsequently we both suffered from PTSD.I went through the motions but the truth is I could not function. Tracey was every bit my heart dog, my dog. Protective of me and the kind of dog who would give her life for me if she had to. Our bond was like no other. But at the same time all these other things had been going on in my family, Tracey was suffering from L7 and hip dysplasia and I knew her days were numbrered. We had been going to the vet once a month, then twice a month, then once a week, then twice a week but nothing was helping her and one day,I told no one, I took her to the vet for the last time. That was the end of me and I became a shut in, hermit or recluse, whatever you want to call it.
Then we got Amy. Instead of a proud and protective GSD, she was goofy and everyone's dog. I couldn't bond with her. Maybe I didn't want to.She didn't seem loyal to me at all, heck she loved strangers. But because of Amy, she got me out of the house where I could go to the barn and walk in my yard without having a panic attack. The nightmares were terrible so I'd sit on the floor of my bedroom and hug her until I felt I could sleep in my bed. She seemed to be working miracles for Daniel too. Eventually, I got back behind the wheel of my truck and with her in the back seat, I was able to drive down the road. Baby steps. Before I knew it, I was going down the mountain road to town. As long as she was with me, I felt a little bit secure and my panic attacks and outbursts were becoming less and less. It was about a year or two later when we bit the bullet and hit the interstate and went to Chattanooga. I got lost and had to stop due to a panic attack. I got in the back seat with her and it was like she was telling me "Its ok"......She had such a way of keeping me calm. I guess the whole time I was bonded with her but didn't realize it. After time I was able to return to work in the family business where she would come with me every day, just in case. With her under my desk, my meltdowns were kept at bay. I owe so much to Amy. I only wish I could have saved her.
In the very end of this clip, you'll see her with my grandbaby, the day before she died. You'll notice how happy she was which is why I didn't have a clue that something was wrong with her.
This is my Tribute to Amy. I'll tell you about my puppy later. But right now, this is about Amy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2TaaON-e1I
Then we got Amy. Instead of a proud and protective GSD, she was goofy and everyone's dog. I couldn't bond with her. Maybe I didn't want to.She didn't seem loyal to me at all, heck she loved strangers. But because of Amy, she got me out of the house where I could go to the barn and walk in my yard without having a panic attack. The nightmares were terrible so I'd sit on the floor of my bedroom and hug her until I felt I could sleep in my bed. She seemed to be working miracles for Daniel too. Eventually, I got back behind the wheel of my truck and with her in the back seat, I was able to drive down the road. Baby steps. Before I knew it, I was going down the mountain road to town. As long as she was with me, I felt a little bit secure and my panic attacks and outbursts were becoming less and less. It was about a year or two later when we bit the bullet and hit the interstate and went to Chattanooga. I got lost and had to stop due to a panic attack. I got in the back seat with her and it was like she was telling me "Its ok"......She had such a way of keeping me calm. I guess the whole time I was bonded with her but didn't realize it. After time I was able to return to work in the family business where she would come with me every day, just in case. With her under my desk, my meltdowns were kept at bay. I owe so much to Amy. I only wish I could have saved her.
In the very end of this clip, you'll see her with my grandbaby, the day before she died. You'll notice how happy she was which is why I didn't have a clue that something was wrong with her.
This is my Tribute to Amy. I'll tell you about my puppy later. But right now, this is about Amy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2TaaON-e1I
