OMG What a nightmare!

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ErikaS.

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May 13, 2008
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Ithaca, Nebraska
My step-daughter bought a horse (a Paint horse) at an auction last year, brought it home, handled him for two weeks. He kicked her (spooked) and then she didn't handle him again...for six months. Meanwhile, it was up to me to feed and water him- step-daughter did pay for his hay. I have a baby, a four year old, 20 goats, 3 minis, a husband, 7 cats, 3 dogs, 2 fish and a full time job- all require my attention. I decided to sell the big horse, who was still afraid of my family after six months anyway.I decide to take him back to the auction on Sat. Not something I really liked to do, but I had exhausted all of my other options. Thursday, my SIL who I haven't seen in a long time Facebooks me and asks if I'm going to the horse auction. Yes, I say, to sell...not buy. If I get a horse, she says, can I leave him at your place for little bit to fix up my corral? Thinking she's kidding...no, really, I thought she was joking! I say sure... because no way in heck would she leave a horse at my acreage again. Last time SIL bought a horse, brought it to our house "for a month or so" which turned into a year. She could barely afford to pay me back for the hay or vaccinations I gave her horse and she only visited about a dozen times. Then she moved to Indiana and sold him.

Saturday comes. I go to the auction and sell my step-daughter's horse. I meet my sister in law there with her two year old granddaughter. I have my two kids. SIL points out horses she likes. Yes, they're nice, I say, let's go to my house now. No she wants to stay a little longer because she wants to see how much the horses go for- she curious. Well... you can see where this goes. She bid on a horse and won. The sellers took off the horse's saddle and he's swaybacked. SIL is shocked and dismayed. She wants to give him back. No can do. Now she wants to take him to my house so she can figure out how to get rid of him. I don't have a trailer. I had to bum a ride for my horse to the auction house from a really nice neighbor that had other things to do that day. SIL wants me to figure out what to do. Start begging for rides I say. So she does and I'm stuck with three small children on a hot day in a place they'd rather not be...for hours. She finally gets the poor old gelding a ride to my place. Don't put him in the pasture, I say, it's overeaten, there's no grass and we're trying to recover it. I have a nice pen on the side yard for him. I walk the old guy to the pen, he sees my minis on the other side of the fence and FLIPS OUT. I calm him down get him into the pen...and he freaks out again about the minis, jumps a fence...into my pasture. SIL says, well, I gotta go. I have to take Lilly (grandaughter)home. @#$%#^^

Now she's trying to sell him via Craiglist. I tell her to let only serious buyers have my number.This whole situation is ridculous and I can't sell a horse to save my life. I'm too honest: he's sorrel, 14.3 hands, swaybacked, toes in with his front feet, doesn't want to lope, but a nice old guy. I think he whacked his knee jumping my fence, too.

I know I could have just said "No" but I have a hard time saying it to people I like- I always want to help if I can. SIL knows that,and she knows I have lots on my plate. She should not have taken advantage of my good nature and now I'm peeved. Thanks for letting me vent. Oh and I had one potential buyer trying to tell me the horse "might be a bay". No, I'm pretty sure he's sorrel, because I am looking at the sorrel horse while we (buyer and I) are on the phone. (sigh) I hope that one doesn't call back.
 
I just wanted to say how sorry I am. It's nice of you to take the horse anyway, but hopefully after this you'll find the strength to say "No!" I am still struggling with that one, but after a few less than fun family adventures I am learning. Sure sounds to me like the gelding is best suited as a companion - especially in the current market - which will probably mean you're going to have him for a while if your SIL has to get her money back. Do you think he'd be suitable as a lesson horse or walk-trot mount? Just looking for angles that might help you sell him. I feel your pain!
 
Oh no, nothing like being done with one problem only to acquire another one. But, I could see that coming as soon as you said "yes" to the question of "can I keep one at your place". Never, ever say "yes" when you truly mean "no, not ever again in 100 years!" It is so much easier to say NO before there is any horse that needs a place to stay. Hope someone will buy him soon.
 
I know I could have just said "No" but I have a hard time saying it to people I like- I always want to help if I can. SIL knows that,and she knows I have lots on my plate. She should not have taken advantage of my good nature and now I'm peeved.
You have no control or responsibility for how others act. You have 100% control and responsibility for how YOU act. This isn't your SIL's fault for taking advantage of you - it's your fault for taking advantage of you. I mean that in all kindness. Until you learn how to say what you mean and feel and not what you think will make someone else happy then you'll continue to be walked over. There's nothing wrong with saying "no" to someone. It doesn't mean you're not a nice person - and if the person you're saying "no" to doesn't respect that - then maybe they're not a nice person lol.

Just learn to say "no" and all this stress will go away
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I'VE HAD THE SAME PROBLEM UNTIL I GOT peeved. I WAS LEFT WITH 3 HORSES FOR A SHORT WHILE( HEARD THAT BEFORE). FEEDING ,WATER,SHOTS,WORMING ADDS UP. I STARTED SENDING A BILL EVERY MONTH AND IF WASN'T PAID BY THE 10TH. A $20. LATE FEE APPLIED. ASKED IF I WAS KIDDING "No" THIS IS A BUSINESS. IT COST ME TO TAKE CARE OF THEM AND MY TIME TO DO SO. IT ONLY TOOK ONE TIME AND HORSES GONE.
 
Yes, I know I am my own worst enemy. It isn't all her fault.
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Never again (I say, hoping I mean it). He's a good old guy. Fine for walk/trot or easy trail rides (unless you happen onto a herd of mini horses). SIL wants me to ask my friends if she can borrow their trailers to move him to her house. I said rent one.

Why is it if you have a little land folks want to dump their animals on you? Kind of like if you own a truck, people want you to haul stuff for them.
 
Kind of like if you own a truck, people want you to haul stuff for them.
Yeah, I have a truck. A very nice low mileage 4x4 truck. Nothing wrong with it. Until, My brother takes it last week to move. He broke the emergency break release and ran it out of gas 3 times. That was after he took it to Sacramento to pick up some dogs in Feb. and overheats it. Almost blew the engine because he didn't watch the gages. When it died from being overheated he says to me what is this "CHECK THE GAGES" light? DUH.... Then he is giving me his freezer while he is moving. He says "You have to come and get it or I am leaving it in the house". Turns out he puts it in the truck and takes it over to my other brothers house and leaves the truck and freezer there. WHY???

Sorry to steal your rant. It seems we all have a "NICE" fault that others seem to zero in on.
 
I'd be riding him over to her place just to get him out of your hair -- heck, I'd be tempted to rent the trailer myself!

Family can be so fun...
 

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