Heartbroken friend

[Roxane Martin]

Annette--

Great courage on your part for disclosing your pain. I have done the same at times, and then afterwards been embarassed as well. But from that has come comfort and friends which would not have been had I not cried out in pain. I think the same has occurred for you.

Great wisdom has been written in this post, particularly by EMB, but others as well. Another wise statement (in addition to the wonderful Serenity prayer) was ~~~Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something~~~

I also know that forgiveness is a choice that you make, as I did that to a great loved one who I believed betrayed me. And I will tell you that after I made that decision and told the person, I felt such a lightness and peace that I knew it was from God. But this was with someone with whom I wanted to continue in relationship. But you can forgive in your heart and walk away as well. Forgiveness is not forgetting, and it is letting go of the negative stranglehold that the other has on you, by your choice. We choose to remember all of the hurt that person has caused us and then they gain great power over us--this hurt is all we think of. One of the items of forgiveness is that we choose not to dwell on this all the time--we let go and let God deal with things.

Marty--I hurt so badly for the pain you and your family has endured. I can say God hurts too. I pray that you can let go of the anger and hatred so that your light is not swallowed up by it. But bless you for sharing that with Annette as an example.

Today we celebrate the birth of One who ultimately was also betrayed by a friend, died for that betrayal, and yet said "Father, forgive them, for they don't know what they are doing." May He, through others as well, support you in your path of love.

Roxane

 

[Minimor]

Forgive and forget. Forgive what they did...and forget them. For me, these people would cease to exist.

Certainly in some cases I would be willing to forget what they did, or at least put it behind me & go on from there. However, in order to do that I would have to see some indication that they were remorseful for what they did. I could be wrong, but in this case I suspect that there is no remorse--they probably don't see or admit that they did or said anything wrong?

Of course it's all too easy for any one of us to say or do the wrong thing--or say the right thing but have it come out the wrong way. But very often when that happens, the speaker is truly sorry for what he/she said--and apologies will be offered. In that case, it is somewhat easier to accept the apology, forgive the person & move on with the relationship, even if that relationship then changes from what it was previously.

One cannot accept an apology that is never given.

Annette, I'm sorry to hear that your friend is sick; I hope that she can find out what is wrong, be treated and so be back to health again SOON. It's no fun being sick, and becomes so much worse when there are people that stomp on you when you're down. I will offer prayers and healing thoughts for her.