my husband is nearing the end of his long fight
- Thread starter Charlene
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AppyLover2
Well-Known Member
Charlene I just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and Gary this morning. I hope you both had a restful night.
MeadowRidge Farm
Well-Known Member
Just checking in, and and letting you know, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Corinne
G
Georgine
Guest
Sending our prayers and thoughts to you and yours.
Loved ones are always near, and waiting for us...just around the corner.
Loved ones are always near, and waiting for us...just around the corner.
Charlene
Well-Known Member
i have finally had a chance to read each post here. for those of you who have been through this nightmare, i am so sorry for your loss. for those of you who have never had to experience this, my prayer is that you never do. it is, indeed, the hardest thing i have ever had to do.
as for where my strength comes from...gary has a huge family and each and every one of them has, at one time or another over the past 21 months, picked me up when i have fallen. they have all been here for me over the past few days and will continue to be the most important people in my life. they are a loving, hugging family and have told me repeatedly that they cannot imagine a better caretaker than i and they are thankful gary found me. it is sheer torture to have to watch gary's mother bring her son home to die. she and gary have always had a very special relationship, he was born to her when she was only 16 and gary has kidded her all his life that they "grew up together". nana and i have laughed, cried, hugged and had some deep spiritual discussions over the past few days. how she remains so stoic is simply beyond me.
we arrived home (we are staying just up the lane at nana's) yesterday. gary is settled in a room just off the living room. i am sleeping on a mattress on the floor next to his hospital bed where i can hear him if he stirs. he had a really good night last night, he slept well and is tolerating the pain medication. i am so thankful we can keep him comfortable. my worst fear in bringing him home was that we could not control his pain but the hospice people have been absolutely a Godsend to us. they check in often and are only a phone call away.
we are moving gary's big recliner to nana's today. we will place it in the living room where he will be able to sit and watch the activity. there is always something going on, somebody visiting, and i want to keep things as normal as i can. gary has always loved that chair and it will be so good to see him in it! much of the time, he mumbles and is hard to understand but every once in a while, he will mention the name of one of his brothers and he will laugh. i know he is remembering fun times and that does my heart good. the hospice nurse explained how, when he seems to be staring off into space and "out of it", what he is doing is helping God prepare him for heaven. we will never know what he is "seeing" but i am confident that he is at peace because the look on his face tells me so. we are a very spiritual family and gary is especially close to God in ways i never really knew until after we had been together for a while.
thank you all again for your compassion and offers of help. i have read all of my private messages and hope to find time later to respond to them all. i heard from lisa and robert, too, is failing. i think of them every day and i pray for robert's peace and lisa's acceptance. i am amazed at the strength of not only lisa but of myself. it seems to come out of nowhere.
love to you all! it's SO good to be home and this morning i hugged my horses a lot tighter and a lot longer than usual. my minis are getting unbelievably fuzzy!! they are SO cute!
charlene
as for where my strength comes from...gary has a huge family and each and every one of them has, at one time or another over the past 21 months, picked me up when i have fallen. they have all been here for me over the past few days and will continue to be the most important people in my life. they are a loving, hugging family and have told me repeatedly that they cannot imagine a better caretaker than i and they are thankful gary found me. it is sheer torture to have to watch gary's mother bring her son home to die. she and gary have always had a very special relationship, he was born to her when she was only 16 and gary has kidded her all his life that they "grew up together". nana and i have laughed, cried, hugged and had some deep spiritual discussions over the past few days. how she remains so stoic is simply beyond me.
we arrived home (we are staying just up the lane at nana's) yesterday. gary is settled in a room just off the living room. i am sleeping on a mattress on the floor next to his hospital bed where i can hear him if he stirs. he had a really good night last night, he slept well and is tolerating the pain medication. i am so thankful we can keep him comfortable. my worst fear in bringing him home was that we could not control his pain but the hospice people have been absolutely a Godsend to us. they check in often and are only a phone call away.
we are moving gary's big recliner to nana's today. we will place it in the living room where he will be able to sit and watch the activity. there is always something going on, somebody visiting, and i want to keep things as normal as i can. gary has always loved that chair and it will be so good to see him in it! much of the time, he mumbles and is hard to understand but every once in a while, he will mention the name of one of his brothers and he will laugh. i know he is remembering fun times and that does my heart good. the hospice nurse explained how, when he seems to be staring off into space and "out of it", what he is doing is helping God prepare him for heaven. we will never know what he is "seeing" but i am confident that he is at peace because the look on his face tells me so. we are a very spiritual family and gary is especially close to God in ways i never really knew until after we had been together for a while.
thank you all again for your compassion and offers of help. i have read all of my private messages and hope to find time later to respond to them all. i heard from lisa and robert, too, is failing. i think of them every day and i pray for robert's peace and lisa's acceptance. i am amazed at the strength of not only lisa but of myself. it seems to come out of nowhere.
love to you all! it's SO good to be home and this morning i hugged my horses a lot tighter and a lot longer than usual. my minis are getting unbelievably fuzzy!! they are SO cute!
charlene
StellaLenoir
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AppyLover2
Well-Known Member
Charlene I'm so glad to hear that you were able to bring Gary home. Hospitals are a good place to be when you don't have a choice but certainly not the last place I'd want to be. I know, in some ways, it's probably more difficult for the rest of you, but so much better for him to be in familiar surroundings with people who love him.
It's truely amazing the strength that God gives us when we really need it. I've never been there personally, but I saw my sister's strength when she lost 2 sons within 2 months. The strength to endure the unendurable is another of Gods many blessings.
It's truely amazing the strength that God gives us when we really need it. I've never been there personally, but I saw my sister's strength when she lost 2 sons within 2 months. The strength to endure the unendurable is another of Gods many blessings.
anoki
Well-Known Member
Sooo glad to hear you have Gary home....in a familiar setting....
(((((hugs)))))
good to 'see' you in here too.....
~kathryn
(((((hugs)))))
good to 'see' you in here too.....
~kathryn
MInx
Well-Known Member
I got up today thinking of you..Bless Gary in his dignity and Peace be with him and you also..I know the holidays will be very very hard for you and please know our prayers and best wishes won't stop when this is over..Marty can tell you I bet that peoples love and caring are so very important after it's all over and quiet..
I see you have a wonderful large family to help and I'm so glad of that. We have such a small family and we all get so lonly as we all live far away from one another so Bless your numbers all.
Soft hugs,
Maxine
I see you have a wonderful large family to help and I'm so glad of that. We have such a small family and we all get so lonly as we all live far away from one another so Bless your numbers all.
Soft hugs,
Maxine
Brandi*
Well-Known Member
Happy you guys are home and comfortable. Sending Lots of hugs your way
Last edited by a moderator:
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Glad to read that he is home.
We lost our mother in-law three years ago the a few days before Thanksgiving to a rare form of liver cancer. They were making plans for her to come home and have hospise come in. We live 12 hours away where she was and we were able to see her and spend some time at the hospital with her. She passed the next day at the hospital.
We lost our mother in-law three years ago the a few days before Thanksgiving to a rare form of liver cancer. They were making plans for her to come home and have hospise come in. We live 12 hours away where she was and we were able to see her and spend some time at the hospital with her. She passed the next day at the hospital.
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Equuisize
Well-Known Member
Charlene, I continue to keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
I do not know where the strength and stoicism comes from that
sees us thru such times. It must lay dormant inside us, till
it is needed.
Gary will pass peacefully, in a a comforting place, with those that
love him the most.....
Use hospice, call them with any concern...they are your ally
in this time.
Take good care
I do not know where the strength and stoicism comes from that
sees us thru such times. It must lay dormant inside us, till
it is needed.
Gary will pass peacefully, in a a comforting place, with those that
love him the most.....
Use hospice, call them with any concern...they are your ally
in this time.
Take good care
Charlene
Well-Known Member
thank you again, everyone! i have so often thought about marty over the past few days and i have told myself that i hope i can be as strong as she is. marty, you truly are an inspiration to me.
we moved gary's recliner and he is happily sitting in the living room with several family members. he really did seem to brighten up when he saw his old familiar chair and oh boy, it does my heart good to see him enjoying it! he is the center of attention! he has not had any pain meds since 6 a.m. and says he feels fine. thank you Jesus!!!
i am home for the duration. i have taken a leave from work, with my boss's blessing. my wish is that when gary passes into God's arms, he will do so while lying in mine. i want to be able to hold him and comfort him and let him know that i will be ok because i know he and God will be watching over me.
such a sad time but gary is making sure we all know he is ready when the time comes. our faith is strong. maybe we have a few more days, possibly even a couple of weeks and we will cherish every moment.
it helps so much to be able to put my thoughts into words here. you all are just another one of my many many blessings!
charlene
we moved gary's recliner and he is happily sitting in the living room with several family members. he really did seem to brighten up when he saw his old familiar chair and oh boy, it does my heart good to see him enjoying it! he is the center of attention! he has not had any pain meds since 6 a.m. and says he feels fine. thank you Jesus!!!
i am home for the duration. i have taken a leave from work, with my boss's blessing. my wish is that when gary passes into God's arms, he will do so while lying in mine. i want to be able to hold him and comfort him and let him know that i will be ok because i know he and God will be watching over me.
such a sad time but gary is making sure we all know he is ready when the time comes. our faith is strong. maybe we have a few more days, possibly even a couple of weeks and we will cherish every moment.
it helps so much to be able to put my thoughts into words here. you all are just another one of my many many blessings!
charlene
hhpminis
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Gharlene
You are an amazing woman. Your strength and outlook is so upbuilding. I hope you know that is is OK to come here and not be strong if you feel the need to be weak at any time. Let us help you if you need it. I will continue with you in my thoughts and prayers. I am so glad you are finding things to be happy about and are enjoying every minute with you husband.
You are an amazing woman. Your strength and outlook is so upbuilding. I hope you know that is is OK to come here and not be strong if you feel the need to be weak at any time. Let us help you if you need it. I will continue with you in my thoughts and prayers. I am so glad you are finding things to be happy about and are enjoying every minute with you husband.
Reble
Well-Known Member
You are not alone Charlene, Thinking of you in your time of need
dreammountainminis
Well-Known Member
Charlene,
This forum has been a blessing and will continue to be for whoever and when ever it is needed...There is alot of honest ,caring and loving people here ..Sometimes I dont know what I would do with out the forum family that I have here ....
I hope and pray for you and gary and your family , I am in your same boat except it is my dad and he has parkinsons .We have past a milestone his 80th b-day back in aug...But it is still just as hard to watch an older love one slip away by a diease that can not be cured ,I have many times thought I am being run over by a mack truck , because you can not do anything to stop it ...But I too cherish every minute ,hour ,day and month that we have left together...And I live by this qoute God does everything for a reason...We may not understand why , But the good lord does....You are in my thoughts and prayers and if you need to talk to someone I am only a PM away.....Take care and god bless...And I agree completely that marty is and has been an inspiration...
This forum has been a blessing and will continue to be for whoever and when ever it is needed...There is alot of honest ,caring and loving people here ..Sometimes I dont know what I would do with out the forum family that I have here ....
I hope and pray for you and gary and your family , I am in your same boat except it is my dad and he has parkinsons .We have past a milestone his 80th b-day back in aug...But it is still just as hard to watch an older love one slip away by a diease that can not be cured ,I have many times thought I am being run over by a mack truck , because you can not do anything to stop it ...But I too cherish every minute ,hour ,day and month that we have left together...And I live by this qoute God does everything for a reason...We may not understand why , But the good lord does....You are in my thoughts and prayers and if you need to talk to someone I am only a PM away.....Take care and god bless...And I agree completely that marty is and has been an inspiration...
