SunQuest
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All,
As you read this post, I request that everyone reading keeps in mind that none of us are here to judge others on this forum... How we handle this is EXTREMELY important as this is what CMHR is founded on. Trust, Compassion, Non-judgmental help...
Late last night I was asked to do another post on Cheif by the owner as a final request for help from CMHR. It is the owner's wishes that I share with you where things stand reguarding Cheif as she feels that others should know.
Following are some of the details as to what went on. I have added them just so you can get a glimps of why the outcome is what it is.
As I have posted on other threads, I offered to help the owner to see what CMHR could do to help. The first thing I did was call the owner and talked to her for at least an hour about Cheif. From our conversation I learned many things about Cheif that are NOT normal in horses. During the conversation, I asked the owner if she would mind if I tried to help this horse in a "non-conventional" manner. After all, this horse has been seen by vets, was on a strict feed/exersize/turnout program, under the owner's loving care for several years, and still Cheif would just tolerate the owner's presense on the best days, and not eat at all if turned out in a pasture.
I knew in my heart that Cheif is what I would call a horse with a "blown" mind. I also knew that this horse was VERY dangerous, not only to himself, but to others.
I then emailed detailed information on what I knew to the other BOD members. From the list of at least 10 issues, most of us felt that CMHR could not help this horse. There were many reasons for that, not to the mention liability issues that could put each individual member of CMHR, as well as the BOD, and everyone else who was involved Cheif at personal risk of being sued if Cheif ever hurt someone after being adopted from our organization. (Liability is a very big concern! It won't stop us, but the BOD MUST take precautions to ensure the financial safety of our members. Without members, CMHR won't exist.)
BUT with all the problems I still was not willing to give up on Cheif! Remeber that I asked to try the "non-conventional" help as what did Cheif have to loose? So with what knowledge I had of Cheif, I called upon Bonnie Fogg for help as everything else had already been tried. I was willing to do anything I could to help Cheif and the owner of him to make the best decision possible. And to ensure that the owner could find a small amount of comfort in knowing that what ever choice she made would be the correct one. THANK YOU BONNIE! YOU ARE AN ANGEL!
From Bonnie's reading, many things were said that ONLY the owner knew about. Cheif was suffering from pain in his legs, mouth pain even though his teeth were just worked on, eyesight problems which were felt to be worse than if Cheif was completely blind as the problems created shadows that basically made Cheif feel like he had to "battle dragons". But the last is what bothered me the most... Cheif hates everything. He hates life, He hates himself. Bonnie told me that Cheif felt that no matter what the wonderful owner did, he would never be happy. It was even said that if "The 'owner' were to wrap Cheif in Satin sheets and give him Satin pillows to sleep on, he still would not be happy." Cheif could be out with 50 mares and still he would hate life. Also, it was noted that Cheif's eyes and brain were linked together as part of the problem. It was either that the eyes were effecting the brain or that the bran was effecting the eyes. (With more searching later, I found out that a very common problem is occular tumors in Appys... Could this have been part of Cheif's problems? We don't know...)
Then one more thing happened during the reading. Bonnie said that Cheif had something happening in the chest area that she felt was directly lined with him trying to exersize.
Lastly, Bonnie was kind enough to reassure me that Cheif would be happier if he wasn't with us any more. Please know that this was said in the kindest most caring way, and that Bonnie stressed to me 3 times that this is not something that she is saying lightly at all.
After the reading I called the owner... About 1/2 hour had passed since the reading. I told the owner what was said the best I could. None of what I said surprised her. But.... when I told her the time of the reading and that Bonnie felt something happening with his chest area and exersize, you could have almost heard a pin drop. At this time the owner knew that Cheif was slamming himself into his stall door trying to get out.
With this reading, I left the owner to ponder the choice she had to make, and to try to understand what I felt during that reading. Those that have done readings with Bonnie may understand these next set of statements and why this was so hard on me. I felt as though I was looking through a window into this horse's soul. I felt like I understood this horse, even if it was not pretty. It makes one feel connected to the horse on a deeper level.
I then informed the BOD of the outcome of the reading, and that neither I nor Bonnie could find a way to help Cheif. Kay called the owner and chatted some more with her about Cheif. From what Kay, Bonnie, and I had learned, we were confident in supporting the owner's decision to euthanize Cheif.
The owner set up an appointment with her vet and Cheif was euthanized this week. And as a side note to this, Cheif was true to his feelings until the very end. Before they could get him out of his stall, Cheif went to bite the owners and kicked at the vet.
I know that you all may not agree with this decision, but I will stand behind the owner 100% on this choice... Please try to understand the toll this took not only on the owner, but everyone else involved. I personally was effected on a deep level. I felt like I had failed Cheif... After all, I am here to help save horses. Remember that this horse was VERY dangerous to himself as well as others. And even though the outside of him appeared healthy, he mentally was not.
May Cheif finally be free of the things that haunted him...
Lastly, I have emailed Bonnie and asked her to post corrections, additions, clarifications, or any other comments on the reading concerning Cheif as the owner wants everyone to understand Cheif and his mental anguish just as the owner came to understand it.
I hope that I have answered all your questions, and I pray that you can find understanding and some comfort in your hearts about this situation. Cheif's owner and CMHR is greatly appreciative of what Bonnie has helped us to understand and can never thank Bonnie enough helping. Thank you Bonnie.
And lastly, I want to ensure everyone that emailed and pm'd me privately that I did forward your messages to the owner. She was aware of your offers for help, and did consider them before making the choice to help Cheif cross the rainbow bridge.
Thank you,
Nila
As you read this post, I request that everyone reading keeps in mind that none of us are here to judge others on this forum... How we handle this is EXTREMELY important as this is what CMHR is founded on. Trust, Compassion, Non-judgmental help...
Late last night I was asked to do another post on Cheif by the owner as a final request for help from CMHR. It is the owner's wishes that I share with you where things stand reguarding Cheif as she feels that others should know.
Following are some of the details as to what went on. I have added them just so you can get a glimps of why the outcome is what it is.
As I have posted on other threads, I offered to help the owner to see what CMHR could do to help. The first thing I did was call the owner and talked to her for at least an hour about Cheif. From our conversation I learned many things about Cheif that are NOT normal in horses. During the conversation, I asked the owner if she would mind if I tried to help this horse in a "non-conventional" manner. After all, this horse has been seen by vets, was on a strict feed/exersize/turnout program, under the owner's loving care for several years, and still Cheif would just tolerate the owner's presense on the best days, and not eat at all if turned out in a pasture.
I knew in my heart that Cheif is what I would call a horse with a "blown" mind. I also knew that this horse was VERY dangerous, not only to himself, but to others.
I then emailed detailed information on what I knew to the other BOD members. From the list of at least 10 issues, most of us felt that CMHR could not help this horse. There were many reasons for that, not to the mention liability issues that could put each individual member of CMHR, as well as the BOD, and everyone else who was involved Cheif at personal risk of being sued if Cheif ever hurt someone after being adopted from our organization. (Liability is a very big concern! It won't stop us, but the BOD MUST take precautions to ensure the financial safety of our members. Without members, CMHR won't exist.)
BUT with all the problems I still was not willing to give up on Cheif! Remeber that I asked to try the "non-conventional" help as what did Cheif have to loose? So with what knowledge I had of Cheif, I called upon Bonnie Fogg for help as everything else had already been tried. I was willing to do anything I could to help Cheif and the owner of him to make the best decision possible. And to ensure that the owner could find a small amount of comfort in knowing that what ever choice she made would be the correct one. THANK YOU BONNIE! YOU ARE AN ANGEL!
From Bonnie's reading, many things were said that ONLY the owner knew about. Cheif was suffering from pain in his legs, mouth pain even though his teeth were just worked on, eyesight problems which were felt to be worse than if Cheif was completely blind as the problems created shadows that basically made Cheif feel like he had to "battle dragons". But the last is what bothered me the most... Cheif hates everything. He hates life, He hates himself. Bonnie told me that Cheif felt that no matter what the wonderful owner did, he would never be happy. It was even said that if "The 'owner' were to wrap Cheif in Satin sheets and give him Satin pillows to sleep on, he still would not be happy." Cheif could be out with 50 mares and still he would hate life. Also, it was noted that Cheif's eyes and brain were linked together as part of the problem. It was either that the eyes were effecting the brain or that the bran was effecting the eyes. (With more searching later, I found out that a very common problem is occular tumors in Appys... Could this have been part of Cheif's problems? We don't know...)
Then one more thing happened during the reading. Bonnie said that Cheif had something happening in the chest area that she felt was directly lined with him trying to exersize.
Lastly, Bonnie was kind enough to reassure me that Cheif would be happier if he wasn't with us any more. Please know that this was said in the kindest most caring way, and that Bonnie stressed to me 3 times that this is not something that she is saying lightly at all.
After the reading I called the owner... About 1/2 hour had passed since the reading. I told the owner what was said the best I could. None of what I said surprised her. But.... when I told her the time of the reading and that Bonnie felt something happening with his chest area and exersize, you could have almost heard a pin drop. At this time the owner knew that Cheif was slamming himself into his stall door trying to get out.
With this reading, I left the owner to ponder the choice she had to make, and to try to understand what I felt during that reading. Those that have done readings with Bonnie may understand these next set of statements and why this was so hard on me. I felt as though I was looking through a window into this horse's soul. I felt like I understood this horse, even if it was not pretty. It makes one feel connected to the horse on a deeper level.
I then informed the BOD of the outcome of the reading, and that neither I nor Bonnie could find a way to help Cheif. Kay called the owner and chatted some more with her about Cheif. From what Kay, Bonnie, and I had learned, we were confident in supporting the owner's decision to euthanize Cheif.
The owner set up an appointment with her vet and Cheif was euthanized this week. And as a side note to this, Cheif was true to his feelings until the very end. Before they could get him out of his stall, Cheif went to bite the owners and kicked at the vet.
I know that you all may not agree with this decision, but I will stand behind the owner 100% on this choice... Please try to understand the toll this took not only on the owner, but everyone else involved. I personally was effected on a deep level. I felt like I had failed Cheif... After all, I am here to help save horses. Remember that this horse was VERY dangerous to himself as well as others. And even though the outside of him appeared healthy, he mentally was not.
May Cheif finally be free of the things that haunted him...
Lastly, I have emailed Bonnie and asked her to post corrections, additions, clarifications, or any other comments on the reading concerning Cheif as the owner wants everyone to understand Cheif and his mental anguish just as the owner came to understand it.
I hope that I have answered all your questions, and I pray that you can find understanding and some comfort in your hearts about this situation. Cheif's owner and CMHR is greatly appreciative of what Bonnie has helped us to understand and can never thank Bonnie enough helping. Thank you Bonnie.
And lastly, I want to ensure everyone that emailed and pm'd me privately that I did forward your messages to the owner. She was aware of your offers for help, and did consider them before making the choice to help Cheif cross the rainbow bridge.
Thank you,
Nila
