How do you guys do it?

[Lucky-C-Acres-Minis]

After some soul searching/thinking I've come to the conclusion that some of the horses need to go since they won't be utilized in the new direction I'm taking the program, so have been putting up ads etc for many of them, and today I did what I thought I'd never do and put one of my *heart* horses up for sale, one of the toughest decisions I've had to make and even though I know it's for the best for both of us, I still really really REALLY hate the thought of him leaving, and I know I'll probably regret it.. I can handle selling babies/young stock, in fact just sold the junior appy prospect, but I've had this guy for a few years and he's had my heart

So how do you do it? How do you get past the feelings/tears and put that special horse out there for someone else?

 

[CheyAut]

I don't! The special ones don't leave me. Even if all they do is hang around, they stay

 

[sedeh]

I think you have to find a special home for him and then it won't feel so bad. When I got out of big horses due to an accident I had to find a new home for my gelding that I had bred and had since a foal. It was really hard but one of my friends had just lost her horse and she started out just riding Jasper and then ended up taking him home. When you know they're in a good home and appreciated it's much easier. Good luck!

 

[hobbyhorse23]

Ditto CheyAut. But then again, I only buy my heart horses so it isn't such an issue!

The most I've ever had is two, and that's my current big horse and mini. And the whole gelding thing takes care of them spontaneously adding to the herd.

All I can tell you is that if it's meant to be, you'll find the perfect home for him and you'll know it when that happens. Listen to the horse! Let him tell you who the new owners are going to be. There will be one he responds really positively to and that's the one you send him home with. You won't have to second-guess yourself or worry or feel bad if the horse himself chose the home. You'll know it's one he wants to be in.

Leia

 

[Miniv]

Leia put it perfectly....... Let the HORSE tell you!

 

[Leeana]

I let my Coco, who was VERY near and dear to me (my first mini), go live with a very good friend of mine a little over a year ago or so. Was it hard? Yes. At first i asked her to just take him for a while as he was not getting any attention here other then a pat and rub out in the pasture...but i knew when i took him to her farm that he was staying there. It was a decision i made for him, not me.

Then there is Royal.....i had offered him for lease and turned down several homes that were GREAT but i really just could never let him leave, he is my

pony. He was my first show horse....i am way more attached to him then i should be.

 

[The Simple Life Farm]

I know exactly how you feel. I have 6 minis that we have been showing, but recently have gotten a few shetlands. I would like to sell 4 of the minis, but my heart will not let me. I would sell them if they went to a friends house and they could all be together, but that is highly unlikely!!! So, I guess they will just be barn brats for awhile.

I am thankful that not everyone feels the same as I do, or no one would be selling horses!!!!

 

[muffntuf]

Kelly has two of my 'heart' ponies she purchased last November. Midge was the worst for me to let go. But I am SO GLAD they went to Kelly because they are just as spoiled (maybe more so) as if I still had them.

It was a very tough decision, but showing by myself, I could not show 3 mares the same age at the same show, and I had 3 coming up in the ranks to show-- so I offered them up for sale to a show home, someday I hope they will get their HOF's, but whether they do or not????? I just know Kelly and her hubby love the two girls and they have a great home with them.

I have others offered now too, I will always make special considerations to show homes in hopes they will go to the show ring and remain there.

It was tough, I cried, I said I would see them at Congress - that made it a bit easier.

 

[Joanne]

I have a hard time with the mares I have foaled out. We have been through so much together.

But I am also VERY attached to my stallions!

You just have to look for that special home where they will be loved and have a good life.

It is also O.K. to cry and miss them. Find someone that will keep in touch with you about them.

 

[krissy3]

you wont want to hear this but I made a decision to move to Switzerland to be with my now husband . I had to find a new home for my gelding , and even though he is happy , and in a great home , and still legally mine ...I never got over the loss. I still cry when I read the newsletters about him , even though its always about accomplishments. For me it was like giving up a child ...I will never get over it . If you worry about not being the same without him , or feeling a hole in your heart that was once filled by him , re think this . Maybe just sponsor him out , knowing that in a year or 6 months you could have him back. I gotta BIG hole in my heart that only a little black horse named Blackie can fill. Its not fun.

 

[Equuisize]

That's a tough tough question and if you find the perfect answer copyright it and sell it

to the rest of us that go thru the same agony. It'd sell like wildfire.

I haven't even figured out a way to sell any of my babies. Good thing I only have one

a year and last year had none.

Friends tell me that others would/could take care of them as good as I - but what if

they didn't?!

If people did they wouldn't end up in rescues, right? I'm probably a control freak

when it comes to them but there is so much you can't control once they leave you.

Then my other 'thing' is I feel like they are a family and I don't want to break that

family unit. The Sisters (Zena and Zuni) are so bonded I can't ever see them not

being together. I think they even share a brain.

 

[Jill]

When I got more serious about showing (halter) and also decided to finally start breeding, I made some tough choices and sold some horses I really loved to homes that had a use for them. However, there were exceptions including my first show horse who had been a stallion. He actually had shown to many halter championships and was National Top 10 in performance. He is too special to part with and he is quite happy living life here on our farm as a gelding. After I bought Destiny ad DunIT, I just didn't see choosing to use Derby over them, yet I couldn't part with Derby. The choices I made with those to sell were right to be sure and I have no regrets, but keeping Derby was also right. Horses are too much of a "job" if you don't allow yourself to keep ones you really do enjoy and do things with -- even if you don't want them in your breeding program or plan to continue to show them.

 

[Filipowicz Farm]

It is hard to do sometimes. We sold our first horse ever in 2004 a B size gelding Filipowicz Peanut who went to Nationals and placed top 10 in halter and driving. He would be used more by the person who bought him. He was one of the horses we learned with and will always be cherished in our memory.

 

[Manyspots]

It is with a heavy heart some times the decisions we have to make, but when one door shuts another opens! I just recently sold a 12 year old mare that was my very first show horse as a yearling. She gave us some nice foals but we weren't breeding her much the last few years as we had to limit the number of foals we could care for. So instead of being out in the pasture with little attention, other than vaccinations and hooftrims she is now in a home being treated like a princess. The new family has a very small number of horses, they bring their horses into their own stalls at night, special treats and grooming too. Some times I worry that people won't take as good of care of them as I do, but I have found out that there are people that treat them better than myself! Also we now have an extended family and wonderful new friends! Lavonne

 

[georgiegirl]

That is exactly why I do not allow myself many horses (either mini or large)

I do not ever sell anything. A couple of times I have let go of a large horse. I do not sell anyone of them. I carefully place them in loving, lifetime homes at no cost to the recepient. I keep very close track of them and I have a signed statement that if they can no longer properly care for them, they come back to me.

The horses that stay here, are here for a lifetime.

 

[eagles ring farm]

Its a hard thing to do for sure

I sold my Smokin this past fall

I knew I was going to make the decission to sell him for a year

before I finally did put him up for sale

Since we will be moving it will be easier with just 1 stallion

and he had gotten taller than I wanted for a stallion

It was hard since he was our second foal born here in 2005 and

he was my show partner for 3 years

But we went to visit him he's just a few hours away

and he is so loved with a wonderful home and his own

small herd of mares

So he is 1 happy guy for sure made me feel great

It was very hard and sad after we sold him but I got used to it and he is better off

The hardest horse in my life to sell was my first horse I was 19 (I'm 56 now I think)

she was my heart horse had her for 11 fun trail riding and speed event filled years

sold her to a friend of a friend when my son was born in 1981

Since her its been easier but Smokin became my partner too so that made it quite hard with him

It will pass but will be quite hard for awhile with some

It certainly has helped most of the people we have sold horses to have stayed in touch

with pics and letting us know how they are doing at shows and how they love them

 

[Little Indian Acres]

That is exactly why I do not allow myself many horses (either mini or large)
I do not ever sell anything. A couple of times I have let go of a large horse. I do not sell anyone of them. I carefully place them in loving, lifetime homes at no cost to the recepient. I keep very close track of them and I have a signed statement that if they can no longer properly care for them, they come back to me.

The horses that stay here, are here for a lifetime.

While this is good advice. Keep in mind these contracts are very very hard to enforce. I have a friend on one side of the country who let someone do a free lease on a dog. Similar contract, but very detailed including limit on breeding rights etc. That dog is now on the other side of the country in the hands of the kennel that the true owner (and breeder) of the dog specifically was making sure did not get him. It will cost her thousands that she does not have to fight it.

 

[Miniv]

It is with a heavy heart some times the decisions we have to make, but when one door shuts another opens! I just recently sold a 12 year old mare that was my very first show horse as a yearling. She gave us some nice foals but we weren't breeding her much the last few years as we had to limit the number of foals we could care for. So instead of being out in the pasture with little attention, other than vaccinations and hooftrims she is now in a home being treated like a princess. The new family has a very small number of horses, they bring their horses into their own stalls at night, special treats and grooming too. Some times I worry that people won't take as good of care of them as I do, but I have found out that there are people that treat them better than myself! Also we now have an extended family and wonderful new friends! Lavonne

You described the perfect home that I think all of us want for our horses.........

Today, we just had a buyer come pick up a young stallion she had purchased from us back in February.

She needed time to finish fencing and build a small barn addition. PLUS, Larry promised to work on ground driving him. MEANWHILE, between February and now, he was pulled from the herd and I began spending a lot more ONE ON ONE time with him......... BAD MOVE.

I unfortunately fell in love with him, so by the time he went to his new home, there were tears.......

 

[barnbum]

I never ever thought I'd sell Blessing. But, a wonderful family of young kids who live near by was very interested in buying both Whisper and Blessing--and I wanted them to be together more than I needed to keep one. Plus, I thought at the time I'd stick with breeding longer, so didn't have room/time for a 30" filly, even though she was a babysitter in every sense of the word-perfect for kids who visited. Well, the family didn't end up getting horses, but I'd gotten used to the idea of selling.... and if I was going to keep Rosie.... So, I put Blessing up for sale the first time, but as soon as someone showed interested and I gave them a price, my stomach churned until I apologized, but I changed my mind. Then when I tried again, Julie showed up--and it was a perfect match.

I remember not shedding a tear the day Blessing left, but four days later I made up for that. Delayed reaction.

Claire sold when she was 2 weeks old, so it was easier because I kept the mind set that I was her caretaker, not her owner.

I'm also an obnoxious seller--I ask grill potential buyers--but hey, if he/she is confident their home is a good one, the questions are fun, not bothersome.

And now I'm supposed to sell some more. Heavy sigh.

My husband says, too "Do you really think you'll find someone who will take better care of them than you do?" That doesn't help. But--of course there are folks who will!!!

Cristina--just do not part with him until you know 100% it's a good home. You can turn interested parties down. It will hurt for a bit when he leaves, but this is a business for you, and this is a part of business?

Or geld him and keep him.

 

[~Dan]

Why don't you try leasing him out for a year or so, you'll find the right home, and if that special family comes along to lease him for a year, and they fall in love with him, then you'll know heck be going to a good home. Or consider co-owning him with someone, that way you can still enjoy him and do whatever with him, yet at the same time, not have to worry about him wasting away in the pasture. And then, should lets say in a few years down the road decide to breed appys again, then you still can

Best of luck with your decision.

I also agree with Karla, if you dont want to part that much, just geld him.