my husband is nearing the end of his long fight
- Thread starter Charlene
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MiniforFaith
Well-Known Member
Charlene, you and your husband have been in my thoughts and prayers.. You are a amazing woman, to think of everyone else when you are hurting so very much!!! Just wish there was something one of us could do to help. We didn't get to bring my mom home, and her's was a little different, but she ended up in a coma for 5 days. It was very hard watching her go threw that... Just try to remember him up and about.. When I start thinking about seeing her for the last time, my mind, then reminds me that that is not how it wants to remember her by. So I usually have a flash back of her yelling at me or laughing.. We are all here for you, just an eye(E-mail) or ear away.. May God give you the strength for the up coming times
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Mona
Well-Known Member
Oh Charlene, you are a strong, strong woman. The love you clearly share with your husband is beyond words. I wish him peace and love, as he crosses over, and send you thoughts and prayers to help get you through that difficult time. (((((HUGS))))) HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Jill
Aspiring Cowgirl
Charlene, you are in inspiration. You, Gary and your family are not ever far from my thoughts.
Kathy2m
Well-Known Member
Charlene,
My thoughts and prayers continue for you and Gary. You are a stong and amazing woman to keep us updated through all this.
My mom had a piper play Amazing Grace at my Dads funeral for the same reason as you. When my mom passed we had a piper pipe most of her service so they both could hear. God Bless you.
{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
Kathy
My thoughts and prayers continue for you and Gary. You are a stong and amazing woman to keep us updated through all this.
My mom had a piper play Amazing Grace at my Dads funeral for the same reason as you. When my mom passed we had a piper pipe most of her service so they both could hear. God Bless you.
{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
Kathy
minie812
Well-Known Member
Footprints in the Sand...Charlene your faith and your family & friends will help guide you and Gary through this difficult time. It is so obvious how much your friends care just by reading this board. May your family have a peaceful holiday!
Charlene
Well-Known Member
this will be quick...gary woke up this morning!!! i cut his pain meds in half last night, he slept all night and this morning seems to be a little refreshed. i removed the oxygen, his breathing is nice and even and he is no longer struggling. i will keep it handy, in case he needs it again but for now, he's doing fine w/o it.
he asked for some coffee so i gave him a few tiny sips from the end of a straw. i asked him if he thinks he might feel good enough to sit in his chair today and he said yes. i am so hoping we can have him up and in his chair before the hospice nurse arrives.
i still plan to go talk to the funeral director today. i know it's inevitable, i will need his services sooner than later and i don't see the sense in waiting.
we never know how long these good periods will last. sometimes gary will rally for several hours, other times only for a few minutes before he slips back into a deep sleep. for however long they last, nana and i and usually 2 or 3 of gary's brothers revel in them.
when we were putting gary in his chair on sunday, george and rod were on each side of him and i was guiding his hips back to the chair. i said "one more step sweetie" and he didn't move. i repeated "one more step, just one more step and then you can sit." i thought he was falling and i gasped. george started laughing and told me gary was dancing with me. that stinker was standing there and moving his feet as if he was dancing and he was grinning and winking at george. he's STILL trying to make me laugh!
in all of this, i can see a little humor here and there. yesterday and last night, it was almost as if we were at his wake. once in a while, one of us would slip up and refer to him in the past tense. we had to keep reminding each other than he is still here and it looks like today, HE will be the one to keep us on our toes.
more later and thank you for your kind words. never in a bazillion years did i ever think *I* could inspire other people. if i have, that's nice but i hope i never EVER have to talk any of you through this experience. i can honestly say, although i questioned my faith more than once in the very beginning, i have grown so much closer to God. if nothing else good comes out of this, at least i have that.
love & hugs to you all. xoxoxo nina
he asked for some coffee so i gave him a few tiny sips from the end of a straw. i asked him if he thinks he might feel good enough to sit in his chair today and he said yes. i am so hoping we can have him up and in his chair before the hospice nurse arrives.
i still plan to go talk to the funeral director today. i know it's inevitable, i will need his services sooner than later and i don't see the sense in waiting.
we never know how long these good periods will last. sometimes gary will rally for several hours, other times only for a few minutes before he slips back into a deep sleep. for however long they last, nana and i and usually 2 or 3 of gary's brothers revel in them.
when we were putting gary in his chair on sunday, george and rod were on each side of him and i was guiding his hips back to the chair. i said "one more step sweetie" and he didn't move. i repeated "one more step, just one more step and then you can sit." i thought he was falling and i gasped. george started laughing and told me gary was dancing with me. that stinker was standing there and moving his feet as if he was dancing and he was grinning and winking at george. he's STILL trying to make me laugh!
in all of this, i can see a little humor here and there. yesterday and last night, it was almost as if we were at his wake. once in a while, one of us would slip up and refer to him in the past tense. we had to keep reminding each other than he is still here and it looks like today, HE will be the one to keep us on our toes.
more later and thank you for your kind words. never in a bazillion years did i ever think *I* could inspire other people. if i have, that's nice but i hope i never EVER have to talk any of you through this experience. i can honestly say, although i questioned my faith more than once in the very beginning, i have grown so much closer to God. if nothing else good comes out of this, at least i have that.
love & hugs to you all. xoxoxo nina
MeadowRidge Farm
Well-Known Member
Charlene, You definitely are a true inspiration for so many of us. (((HUGS))) and prayers for you and Gary. You tell Gary to keep those dancing shoes on and just keep thinking one more dance, it is so wonderful that you have family to surround you and Gary in your time of need. Corinne
Connie Ballard
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Oh Charlene...the steps that God is leading you through as you begin to say good-bye are so familiar. When my 59yr old sister was slipping away...we enjoyed the moments like you with 'one more step sweetie' type moments....amazing isnt it...to share a smile or little laugh. It seemed like building a bridge...teaching us and affirming that things are going to be ok...different...but ok. Peace be with you all.
Connie
Connie
Equuisize
Well-Known Member
I've still got a smile on my face from your telling of Gary's
dacning with you.... What a couple you must be!
But I'm also kind of laughing as we all call you Charlene
but are you really --- xoxoxo, Nina???
I hope Gary has a fabulous day today......
I will keep you in my thoughts while you take care of your
other chore....
dacning with you.... What a couple you must be!
But I'm also kind of laughing as we all call you Charlene
but are you really --- xoxoxo, Nina???
I hope Gary has a fabulous day today......
I will keep you in my thoughts while you take care of your
other chore....
S
StarRidgeAcres
Guest
Charlene,
You are the most amazing person!
I've been through this with both of my parents. With my father I was too young (12) to realize the finality of the situation so I didn't make very good use of the remaining time I had with him. With my mother, I was a married adult and had better skills to cope with it. We brought her home to our house and with the help of some amazing hospice folks, we were able to let her go in peace in a familiar place with her family around. For those who have never been through it, this will sound odd, but you may understand...it's both the worst and the best time of your life. There is a certain peace that comes with knowing your loved one is pain-free and surrounded by loved ones. It's truly a blessing to have the time to say goodbye. Not everyone gets that opportunity, so it's to be treasured. My mom's worst fear was to be placed in a nursing home. We were able to bring her to our home and that was the greatest gift I could have given her. I was surprisingly calm when she passed. We were all there when she slide quietly away.
May God bless you, Gary and the rest of your loved ones.
You are the most amazing person!
I've been through this with both of my parents. With my father I was too young (12) to realize the finality of the situation so I didn't make very good use of the remaining time I had with him. With my mother, I was a married adult and had better skills to cope with it. We brought her home to our house and with the help of some amazing hospice folks, we were able to let her go in peace in a familiar place with her family around. For those who have never been through it, this will sound odd, but you may understand...it's both the worst and the best time of your life. There is a certain peace that comes with knowing your loved one is pain-free and surrounded by loved ones. It's truly a blessing to have the time to say goodbye. Not everyone gets that opportunity, so it's to be treasured. My mom's worst fear was to be placed in a nursing home. We were able to bring her to our home and that was the greatest gift I could have given her. I was surprisingly calm when she passed. We were all there when she slide quietly away.
May God bless you, Gary and the rest of your loved ones.
Brandi*
Well-Known Member
Oh I am SO happy to hear that Gary woke up this morning. Even if it's not for long, at least you will get to enjoy him a little longer. Hopefully you can get him into his chair today
Stay strong and know that we are all thinking and praying for you guys
AppyLover2
Well-Known Member
Charlene your request that we remember to be thankful and tell our loved ones how much we love them brought tears to my eyes. We are always WAY too busy taking the future for granted until part of that future we counted on is gone. Thank you for reminding us. God Bless You and yours!
runamuk
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You are an inspiritation
And your reminder of WHAT Thanksgiving is really about brought tears to my eyes.
While most of us are going along worrying about tomorrow, there are those who may not see tomorrow......
continued love and light surrounding you and your family
And your reminder of WHAT Thanksgiving is really about brought tears to my eyes.
While most of us are going along worrying about tomorrow, there are those who may not see tomorrow......
continued love and light surrounding you and your family
anoki
Well-Known Member
I ditto the exact thing that Equuisize said!!!! From smiling about Gary dancing with you.....and Nina??? After us calling you Charlene all this time
I too hope the rest of Gary's day has been just as good as it started!
And it sounds like Gary hasn't forgotten about you through all this either....yes what an amazing couple you must be
~kathryn
Nina!
(Is that some kind of abbreviation for Charlene?)
Just checking up on the both of you. That's great that Gary has woken up, even if it is for a brief period of time.
I'm thinking of you both.
xox Leonie xox
Just checking up on the both of you. That's great that Gary has woken up, even if it is for a brief period of time.
I'm thinking of you both.
xox Leonie xox
Charlene
Well-Known Member
LOL, "nina" is what gary has always called me. it's been my nickname since i was a little girl but he is the only person outside of my family who uses it. i answer to either.
my mind must have been wandering when i signed it!
gary DID get in his chair today! he is resting comfortably under nana's watchful eye while i came up to our house to feed the dogs, prepare some beet pulp for the horses and take a quick shower. gary even ate a little pudding today and drank a lot of water. i think perhaps cutting the dosage of his meds (on the advice of his hospice nurse) has maybe helped. he is having no pain at all and that is my biggest concern so we're good to go!
i would love for you all to see this awesome man...this picture was taken during a time when we did not have a care in the world. can you tell?
gary DID get in his chair today! he is resting comfortably under nana's watchful eye while i came up to our house to feed the dogs, prepare some beet pulp for the horses and take a quick shower. gary even ate a little pudding today and drank a lot of water. i think perhaps cutting the dosage of his meds (on the advice of his hospice nurse) has maybe helped. he is having no pain at all and that is my biggest concern so we're good to go!
i would love for you all to see this awesome man...this picture was taken during a time when we did not have a care in the world. can you tell?
hhpminis
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Thank you for posting the picture of Gary.
Glad the day has gone well for you.
Glad the day has gone well for you.
Reble
Well-Known Member
Thanks for sharing
Equuisize
Well-Known Member
What a wonderful choice of a photo to share.
I'm sure he would rather everyone remember him
at that point of his life.
I will keep that smiling face in my mind when I
say my prayers for the two of you.
Hooray for a good day!
Keep taking good care of you!
I'm sure he would rather everyone remember him
at that point of his life.
I will keep that smiling face in my mind when I
say my prayers for the two of you.
Hooray for a good day!
Keep taking good care of you!
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