Need some advice

[KanoasDestiny]

Ok, I'll try to make this a short story, and yes it is mini-related

: . I live in a duplex on a 2 acre lot. My husband and I live in APT B, my mom and 17 year old brother live in APT A, and we have neighbors in two different houses behind us. I know the people in APT D really well but have never met the new people in APT C. I board Zoey and Gideon at my mom's neighbor's house (to her right). Confused yet? So basically, the horses are on the side of APT C & D.

A couple of weeks ago, I was out walking Gideon when a woman came up to the fence. So I began to talk with her about the horses. She told me that she brings her grandson (who lives in APT C) over to see the horses through the fence every morning. He's only two and a half. My husband and I brought the horses up to the fence so he could pet them, and I have to admit, it was really cute. The woman started saying how we should take them to the rodeo and set up a picture booth, so kids could get on them and take pictures. I explained to her that I never plan on allowing children to get on their backs, and that there is a weight/size capacity anyways. She acted as if she understood that her grandson nor any other child will EVER be allowed on either of my horses backs.

Last week, I was out with the horses, and she brings her grandson back over to see them. So we walked the horses up to them and let him pet them. We were just about to take the horses back to their pen when the woman told her grandson that maybe when they are older, he can sit on them. :new_shocked: The look I gave my husband could have went into the Ripley's Believe It or Not book. I was speechless. Again, I told her that children won't be allowed on their backs EVER! She just smiled at me.

I saw her outside yesterday when I was with the horses. I actually hid, so that she wouldn't be tempted to bring her grandson up to the fenceline. I am not looking forward to discussing this a third time. Please give me advice on how to handle this situation. I don't think I could have made myself any more clearer. I am sure that a lot of you have also been in a situation a lot like this, so please share on how you did or would handle it to get the point across. I don't want to hide everytime I see her vehicle pull up.

 

[_minihorses4ever_]

Hmm.. Tough situation you have there..

So she never brings her grandson up the fence unless you are around? Well, in that case, I don't think you need to worry about her putting him on your horses. And when you are around, if she asks to let him sit on them, just politely say no.

IMO, you have already told her twice, you do not need to tell her again. She is an adult, and she shouldn't have to be told more than twice.

 

[Soggy Bottom Ranch]

I think my suggestion would be to give it a little time, and see where this goes. I have lake people who mention to kids when they are walking, "maybe we can get a ride sometime", but it never goes anywhere. It's just idle chat. If it keeps getting brought up though, and it makes you uncomfortable, let her know in a nice polite manner how it makes you feel. I'm sure it's just a missunderstanding. Good luck!

 

[Amy]

:aktion033: :bgrin

of course if it persists, you can smile sweetly & say

" NO is a very small 2 letter word. Which letter do you NOT understand?" I have made myself clear on many occcasions. And walk away -- End of discussion !! Polite BUT firm

 

[Reble]

You might not like what we have done. :new_shocked:

We have a 32" stallion and we have had people stop especially neighbours with their grandchildren, and have asked us, if they could sit on the horse?

He is the only one we would do this with, because the others are not as sure of little children.

We explain they really are not for riding but if they are small enough like a 2.5 year old or so, will not in our opinon hurt the horse to have a child up on the mini and walked a few steps around, most of the time at that age, they sometime will not want up, or as soon as they are up want right back off.

We also explain they can drive a pull alot more weight, so next time we are out with the cart and you see my husband wave him over and he will give the little guys a ride. We did this summer, and their grandparents when ever we see them, tell us they are so thankfull we did that and the children never stop talking about it.

Now we are not really talking about riding the horses, we just put the child up for a very short period at 2 to 4 years old, they can be very small and you must balance such a small child.

You can also explain your horse has never had anyone on their backs and could buck, if you are afraid of hurting the horse in any way.

:

 

[Nichcole]

It amazes me how many people think kids can ride minis. I was recently giving mni cart rides at our local pumpkin patch and many people got mad at us b/c we would not allow kids to sit on them for pictures... We explained to them why and they still did not understand. We also had alot of people coming up to us and saying they have minis thier kids ride.

 

[Sandee]

This comes under the catagory of "I can top that!". I was attending a miniature horse show with my sister's family at a state fair. These non-English speaking people came up with small children and started pointing at the minis and trying to make us understand. All of a sudden one guy plops his kid on top of one mare and holds her there smiling at his other friend for a picture! Then they repeated this with two more kids (I have to insert here that these were all small 1-3 yr old children).

All without asking, partly because of the "language" barrier (don't get me started) and partly because they had an attitude like they deserved to do whatever they wanted! Then they smiled and walked off. We all stood there pretty much in shock. First because we'd never even been consulted if they could do this and second because this little mare had never had anyone on her back. The whole thing could have gone SO wrong in so many ways!

 

[Jetiki]

I have a 2.5 yr old maybe she's trying to appease the kid???? My son ALWAYS wants to ride my weanling Trouble, he can't do that so I tell him maybe when he's older and it satisfies his little brain. I do allow him to ride my 39" and my 35" horse but my son is only 25lbs, my taller one is 3 and my shorter one is 6 so I don't feel this is detrimental to them and he's only on for a few minutes anyway. Who knows what they talk about in the house.

I'm not saying this is the case just offering an opinion

Karen

 

[HGFarm]

I just flat tell people that Minis are not 'made to ride'- they are bred for harness work.

Also, as a horse owner YOU are responsible for any accidents, injuries etc... and I heard of one case that the horses were called an 'attractive nuisance' because kids climbed through a fence into where some were without permission!

We had some people trying to ride a couple of our mares that were boarded during a move many many years ago. Let me tell ya, those folks got a piece of my mind!!!

Hopefully they are smart enough not to just help themselves..... I would just be a little more short about it and tell them flat NO, that that is not what Minis are for.

 

[Lisa-Ruff N Tuff Minis]

well I must say first I am not one who believes mini cant and shouldnt be ridden. Heck.. in reality many of the ponies that I rode all day long as a 6-9 yr old were minis by definition and they were more then fine for us to be riding. Granted they were all heavier build types but they went ALL DAY LONG.

A pony is a pony no matter what you wanna call it (ducking now)

Also really why do you have to tell her anything. You have told her no, made your feelings quite clear and really there is nothing left to be said. If she thinks somehow her saying it over and over will make you change your mind then I guess she will soon figure it wont. She did seem to undertand you wanted to wait till they were 3 so you have a couple of years and by then I am sure her grandson will have moved on.

I say dont worry about it to much at this moment.

 

[HGFarm]

I am not saying they can't be ridden, but sometimes with a 'pest' or someone who just doesnt get it, you just have to be blunt and straightforward. If the lady thinks it's ok, then this woman will never have any peace and quiet!

 

[HGFarm2]

I am not saying they can't be ridden, but sometimes with a 'pest' or someone who just doesnt get it, you just have to be blunt and straightforward. If the lady thinks it's ok, then this woman will never have any peace and quiet!

Maybe pesty lady needs to buy or lease her grandson his own pony and then not bug other people about theirs. Just my opinion but your right if she is not getting it then maybe the blunter the better.

 

[Warpony]

I tell people that my horses are not safe to be ridden because they are not trained for it, and that the pony has health issue that make it dangerous for him to be ridden. I finish up by saying, "I really wouldn't want to risk your child getting hurt, it really wouldn't be safe." That usually gets them to leave me alone, and helps insure that they won't sneak out there and give the kids a ride when I am not around.

 

[KanoasDestiny]

Thankyou so much for your advice/experiences/opinions. I did have a family that lives across the street come over and ask to take pictures with the horses. The horses did fairly well, even with 6 children hurdled around them. The father asked the oldest daughter to place a little baby girl on Zoey's (who was only 8 months at that time) back. Thank goodness the girl either didn't hear him or didn't want to do it because she ignored his suggestion. I didn't have to tell them not to do it.

The grandmother seems very pushy. Don't get me wrong, she is nice but everytime I try to explain something to her, she turns around and says something like "well then you could do (insert another suggestion)". I told her that Zoey and Gideon are only pets and they won't be trained to have children on them, nor do I want children on them for whatever purpose (mostly safety). Her grandson never asked or motioned to get on them, so she just threw the suggestion out there and assumed I would agree. I think it was her attitude and the look/smile she gave me afterwards that made me feel as if this will be a persistant thing.

I think if it continues, I will just stop taking the horses over to let her grandson see them, unless it is his mother or someone else who brings him over.

: Thanks again.

 

[Field-of-Dreams]

Well, the next time she asks, tell her "No, they cannot be ridden, and if you ask again I won't bring them over anymore for the kids to pet." So she'll know WHY you don't come over anymore.

Lucy

 

[Cronewolf]

:new_shocked: Perhaps she thinks they are babies and will grow up enough to be riden?

 

[dannigirl]

I read this thread earlier and had no advice, so did not respond, but it has been on my mind. I finally figured out why. Is it possible that this grandmother is in the early stages of Alzheimers disease? If so, she would know that the boy was her grandson and would be able to watch him for short walks ect (while mom or grandpa were in the house--posibly) and I know from experience (my mother-in-law suffered with the disease for nearly 15 years--progressively getting worse) that if she is in the early stages, that she would not remember even saying anything about riding the horse. She may even repeat it several times during one visit. The best way to handle that would be to either repeat your response, or just ignore the remark because they are very protective of children and would probably not ever attempt to get to the horse without you there for fear of the child getting hurt. I don't know what your situation is, but it is something I thought about.

Angie

 

[KanoasDestiny]

Thank you again for the suggestions. This grandmother looks like she is only in her late 30's or possibly very early 40's. Alzheimers disease doesn't seem to be a factor, as she remembered other things I had told her previously.

I hate confrontation and being rude, so I guess I'll just repeatedly remind her that children will not be allowed to sit on either of them, if it keeps coming up. Thanks again.

 

[littlearab]

I would just tell her that they are not broke to ride. She is not going to risk her grandson getting hurt, like it was said before she is most likly just telling him that because HE keeps asking her if he can ride. It much easier to tell a small child "later dear" then to put up with a tantrum. It really is no big dealIMHO

But really I see a thing wrong with a miniature horse being ridden by a child.. they are in fact horses/ponies and they can be ridden.

I said it before many times.. there is no good sound reason way a mini can not be riden by a small child.