Twisted Wishes

[REO]

Granted, but it only plays Barry Manilow (spelling)

I wish I had some clean socks!

 

[twister]

Granted, but it only plays Barry Manilow (spelling)
I wish I had some clean socks!

granted but they have holes in the toes and heels

I wish someone would give me maid service for a year

 

[Sterling]

I wish someone would give me maid service for a year

Granted ...but Jimmy Kimmel rents you out Guillermo and he does'nt know what to do with a dust pan and mop.

I wish it had not gotten as cold as it did today and forecast for snow goes by the wayside tomorrow.

 

[McBunz]

Granted, now it will snow today and get cold tomorrow instead.

Wish someone would wash all my windows..

 

[Irish Hills Farm]

Wish someone would wash all my windows..

Granted but they are washed with black paint.

I wish for a new electric toothbrush.

 

[River Wood]

Granted but it takes the enamel right off your teeth.

I wish I were 20 again.

 

[Irish Hills Farm]

I wish I were 20 again.

Granted but you look like you do now and have all the aches and pains (if any) that you do now.

I wish I had my own island in the carribean.

 

[jayne]

Granted, but it is populated entirely with cannibals!

I wish I had a tractor.

 

[Slinkky]

Granted, but it comes in a small box, assembly required.

I wish I had more vacation days left.

 

[Irish Hills Farm]

I wish I had more vacation days left.

Granted but you have to spend your vacation time on my carribean island that is populated with cannibals so I can make my escape.

I wish I had a different island, no cannibals.

 

[RockRiverTiff]

I wish I had a different island, no cannibals.

Granted, but the previous owner already agreed to have Survivor taped there, so now it's populated by a film crew and a bunch of whiny goobers (and you're not eligible for the million).

I wish I had a nice big mug of hot chocolate with fluff.

 

[Reignmaker Miniatures]

Granted but the 'fluff' is cotton balls.

I wish I didn't have a dentists appointment today

 

[Irish Hills Farm]

I wish I didn't have a dentists appointment today

Granted you instead have an appointment with a proctologist.

I wish I had a new yellow hat.

 

[Russ]

Granted but now bumble bees think your their leader.

I wish I had a can of WD-40 for my rusty buns.

LOL...on the proctologist, I was gonna post the exact same thing but you beat me

Granted you instead have an appointment with a proctologist.
I wish I had a new yellow hat.

 

[Maxi'sMinis]

I wish I had a can of WD-40 for my rusty buns.

Granted but the can is out of propellent.

I wish I had Brad Pitt over for dinner and dessert!

 

[Irish Hills Farm]

I wish I had Brad Pitt over for dinner and dessert!

Granted but you weren't allowed to talk to him and everytime you so much as looked at him, his body guards slammed you to the ground. Worse yet, they ate all the food and left your house a total mess.

I wish for another water pillow.

 

[Reignmaker Miniatures]

Proctologist ?!!!

Really now that was just mean rofl

I wish for another water pillow.

granted but it is full of holes and you have dreams of drowning every time you use it.

I wish my daughter would quite looking thro the cupboards for all the cookies I just bought

 

[Irish Hills Farm]

I wish my daughter would quite looking thro the cupboards for all the cookies I just bought

Granted because she has found them and is now sharing them with me.

I wish for new shoe laces.

P.S. I thought the protologist thing was funny. I mean that has to make going to the dentist seem like a walk in a park.

 

[SunQuest]

I wish for new shoe laces.

Granted, but the shoe laces are made out of waxed dental floss and won't stay tied no matter what you do.

I wish that my company's holiday party was on a Saterday evening instead of a Friday evening.

 

[Reignmaker Miniatures]

Granted but you have to work Saturday morning

I wish I didn't have to see the dentist AGAIN today for a filling