# * Michael * Two years ago today



## Marty (Jun 10, 2008)

Michael is gone now two years ago today. Time doesn't seem to help things get better. We are still every bit hurt as much today as two years ago. We still have meltdowns. We still cry every day. We miss our Michael and want him to come home.

I have made a lot of very good close friendships here, and Dan also has made some very good friends here too. We want you to know how much your support and friendships has meant to us. We could not have gotten this far without you. Much love to you.







To date I wrote 187 poems about and for Michael

This is one of them that I don't even remember writing early on

Mom I hope you aren't mad at me

because I got the mini chopper to run

I just had to try it out a little bit

I was having so much fun

I remember we were working on the fence

and you told me to go take a break

Instead I went back to the garage to work

but I didn't know it would be a fatal mistake

After a while I finally got it going

I was so proud of myself

No one's been able to fix it for years

I did with old parts from the garage shelf

You know I wasn't even on the road

I just wanted to see how it would handle for me

I know what happened after that

Mom, someone ran over me

He drove off fast and left me mom

I was there all alone in the grass

Then I realized you heard it all back at the house

The sound of the terrible crash

Mom I really wanted to stay

I did my best to try

I hung on as long as possible

and I could hear you cry

Mom I'm so sorry I had no choice

I tried to come back two times they said

but my heart wouldn't jump start any more

and before I knew it I was dead

There was a light that was pulling me up

as I left my body behind

I floated up with Angels

and they were so very kind

I kept looking down below

and it was awful what I had seen

dad was covered all over in my blood

but somehow I still felt serene

I asked the Angels to let me come back

I told them you'd want me back home

but they said that God was waiting for me

and that I wasn't really leaving you alone

I asked them so many questions

and wanted to know about Dad

I was worried that I was in trouble with him

when I leave tools out he gets mad

I wanted to know about my little brother

and who's going to watch out for my Dan

but the Angels assured me that it all will be right

and he would grow into a fine young man

I can see you mom in a very bad way

I expected that from you

You keep crying all the time

but there's nothing more I can do

You have to remember our last days together

and my new comic routine

I made you laugh so much those days

but now I only hear you scream

I know nothings' going to be enough for you mom

but right now it's the best I can do

I know you want to touch my face

and have plenty of hugs left for me too

Use those hugs to wrap around Dan

and tell him they are from me

and I hope you plant that little garden

and take care of my willow tree

Then plant some flowers around it

and I'll help sprinkle them with some of my tears

they'll grow this time I promise you mom

and help you get through the years

Mom I know it's been a long time

and you can't seem to let me go

That's alright, I understand

I will always love you so

I chose these because they have special meaning to Michael and me



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nrq3DFa7AxE...feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bax8FqBECd0


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## Brandi* (Jun 10, 2008)




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## Feather1414 (Jun 10, 2008)

I still miss him.

I was actually talking to Tabitha the other night, and oddly enough that same night I was watching Captain Ron. I think he was there laughing with me.


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## Barbie (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty-

Thinking of you, Dan and Jerry today as you mark this sad day.

Take care,

Barbie


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## Charlene (Jun 10, 2008)

bless your heart, marty. i cannot possibly know your grief and i cannot possibly say anything that will bring you comfort. there simply are no words. you are in my thoughts and prayers.

i have been told the pain never goes away, it just gets "different", maybe some day even tolerable. i hope that day can come for you and your family.


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## Maxi'sMinis (Jun 10, 2008)

I am truly sorry I didn't know Michael, what a handsome boy. Through your writings I feel I do know him. Thank you for being so strong and sharing your thoughts with all of us. Prayers that God continues to give you strength to go on day to day. You are an inspiration.

God bless Marty your are in my thoughts.


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## maplegum (Jun 10, 2008)

My thoughts are with you and your family Marty.

xox Leonie xox


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## REO (Jun 10, 2008)

:CryBaby





I know that he was the child of your spirit. There will never be words enough to tell you of the pain in my heart. I send you all hugs now and always.


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## Leeana (Jun 10, 2008)

I will be thinking of you, jerry and dan all day today. I truly sorry Marty, truly



. Still remember where i was at when Fran told me


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## kaykay (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty there just are no words but you know how much I love you and hurt for you.

Kay


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## sfmini (Jun 10, 2008)

I was at the AHMA June BOD meeting when I saw that posting. The rest of that trip is just in a fog. I just couldn't believe that happened, and just felt so very sad for your family.

Thinking of you today.


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## SampleMM (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty,

My heart goes out to you and your family on this day. Through reading your posts, it is obvious that you are a very special person. My best friend's son died at 19 in a car accident. She struggles with it everyday too.

I can't help but think that in the end those that have suffered so much will be so happy forever.





Take care,

Debbie


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## minie812 (Jun 10, 2008)

I have never "LOST" a child but I do believe in spirit and I know he is with you in your heart and I believe that you will be together again as a family and again your family will be complete


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## Crabby-Chicken (Jun 10, 2008)

Two years.... it doesn't seem possible. It change a lot of our lives on that day. I know it changed mine. It showed me not to assume everything will always be the same. It taught me, through you, that if the most feared thing happened in my life, I will go on. You showed me you can,,, will, and I hope I can do it with class as you did.

I hope from now you can be in a little less pain. The trial was always looming in the future. I hope Michael can show you that he is fine and watching out for all of you. I wish we on the forum could take some of the pain away.


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## RobinRTrueJoy (Jun 10, 2008)

I remember. He wasn't mine, but I think of him a lot. Wish I was there to give you a great big hug.

love,

Robin


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## Sanny (Jun 10, 2008)

I've been thinking about Michael and your family for the last couple of days and have visited his web pages.

I will NEVER forget when it happened and all the smallest details that were shared with us.

My birthday was yesterday and though I'd remember Michael anyway, I think of him whenever I think of my birthday. I try to remember all the fun, good stuff that you've shared over the years about raising the boys instead of just that terrible, terrible day.

I hope your family is doing ok and are spending the day together. You will be in my thoughts today especially. I cannot even imagine me being as strong as you have been through all of this.


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## Marylou (Jun 10, 2008)

((((hugs))))


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## SWA (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty, no words can ever be said enough. Just holding in continued love, hugs and endless prayers for you and your precious family.


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## lilhorseladie (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty,

When I think of how your heartbreak rocked this entire forum, changed how we all thought, acted and looked at our own children. We all lost a little the day you did, but I can not even fathom, your feelings of loss. I for one, didn't know you or Michael, but I will never forget that day two years ago. First there was a happy, funny post about the barn or fence or something you were all working on, then...then... the very heart wrenching post about Michaels being run down. Marty, I am praying for you all today, friends and family. I think each of us, need to remember Michaels love for life, family and animals today and take an extra moment to appreciate what we have, because in a blink, a millisecond, it could be gone. So as I head out to finish chores, and as I deal with friends and family, and strangers on the street, today will be Michaels day...I will work to find an extra bit of kindness to bless others.

Hang in their Marty


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## hhpminis (Jun 10, 2008)

Hugs to you friend. I know these days of remembering are hard on you and your family. Words cannot convey how much you are loved and admired here.

Michaels memory lives on in all of us whos life he touched.


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## StellaLenoir (Jun 10, 2008)

so sorry , there are no words


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## ErikaS. (Jun 10, 2008)

I am sorry for your loss. My prayers go out to you.


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## The Simple Life Farm (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty,

Hoping you and your family find strength to carry on through this sad day. Try to keep nothing but the happy memories in your heart, not of the day he passed. Hugs to all.


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## Cimarron (Jun 10, 2008)

Love to you too, Marty. Sheila


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## Sonya (Jun 10, 2008)

I will be thinking of you and your family today. ((hugs))


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## Vertical Limit (Jun 10, 2008)

I know this is tough for you Marty. Thinking of you and your family today.

Carol


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## nootka (Jun 10, 2008)

I am so sorry, Marty.

I think of you and of Michael, often.

Just the other day I saw a photo that I took the day that I heard the news about Michael. My family and I were over in Central Oregon and I took a photo from behind a bunch of flowers growing on top of a cinder cone.

Seeing that photo made me remember how close to home your loss hit me, with a boy very close to the same age, same interests as Michael (Kenny). I read him the riot act about riding his quad on the road, all that Summer. I think he understands me, but I don't think he can truly understand until he is a parent...and even then...I hope I never fully understand what you are going through.

I know you know what I mean. You have suffered the worst loss I can imagine.

When Kim told me (Crabby Chicken) on the phone, I laid down and cried and my Dad and Stepmom didn't know what happened, but I do remember that pain like it was today.

I wish there were any way Michael could be with you...

Life is so unfair.

Liz


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## tnovak (Jun 10, 2008)

Thinking of you and your family, there are no words to ease your pain.


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## Hosscrazy (Jun 10, 2008)

Keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers, Marty. I will always remember logging on and seeing your original post...



Could not believe it was true...





Liz R.


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## Magic (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty, the poem you posted brought me to tears and made me realize yet again just how much I don't know about the depth of your pain for the loss of your beloved Michael. Ireally have no words, just {{{hugs}}}}


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## Reignmaker Miniatures (Jun 10, 2008)

I'm sitting here at my computer with tears streaming down my face. I wasn't a member of this forum 2 years ago but I am a mother of a son who is more precious to me than air so if the pain I feel at the mere thought of loosing him is only a dim echo of what you are feeling I am amazed at your strength in carrying on. I want to thank you too, when you share your pain and the poems you write to help you express it I remember that we none of us can know the day we will loose a loved one and I hug my children one more time like it will be the last. You make me remember to appreciate the time I am given with them. Today I will think of a young man I have never met and his family, and I hope and pray you can find peace in this life.


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## Lisa (Jun 10, 2008)

It's surreal to me that it has been two years since this world lost such a beautiful soul. I am crying reading your poem and thinking ab out it even now. There is no words I can say to comfort you and Jerry and Dan, but I will say that I still think about all of you and Michael regularly.

I will never forget that day. I knew something terrible had happened when I logged into the forum, but I could not believe it. I sat in shock for a boy I had never met, but felt that I know, for several minutes. I cried so hard for you that my mom came into my room, thinking that someone in our family had passed away. I told her it was someone in MY family.





I will be thinking of you today.


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## anoki (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty,

I too cannot believe it has been 2 years....and I cannot even begin to imagine the pain that all of you have been through and continue with since that time. All 3 of you have frequently been in my thoughts since that horrible day....oddly enough you have been on my mind for the past couple days, don't really know why, and maybe this is why.

I remember that day too. I hadn't been in here for weeks (actually a couple of months) because I couldn't take the slowness of our dial up internet. The day before it happened, our highspeed had finally been hooked up and was working. So my first time back in here and I saw that post....I sat here in tears....I just couldn't believe it....

((((hugs)))) I will be thinking of you all throughout the day....I hope it does help knowing that we are all here to support you!

~kathryn


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## Miniv (Jun 10, 2008)

Blessings, Prayers to you and the family........


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## New_Image (Jun 10, 2008)

Thinking of you, Jerry and Dan and keeping you all in my prayers.


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## Sandy S. (Jun 10, 2008)

THINKING OF YOU AND YOUR FAMILY DURING THIS TIME TO HELP YOU REMEMEMBER THE GOOD TIMES AND MICHAEL WILL ALWAYS BE WITH YOU.


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## MeadowRidge Farm (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty, Its so hard to believe its been two years already. I remember coming on here and seeing your post right after it happened. I have been told too it gets easier with time..but I dont believe it gets any easier ever, I think we just learn to accept it in a differant way. Always here for you..anytime. (((HUGS))) to you , Jerry and Dan.

Corinne


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## Sterling (Jun 10, 2008)

Words cannot begin to explain the sorrow I felt for you and your family when this happened to Michael. Holding you in prayers. God Bless.


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## candycar (Jun 10, 2008)

Thinking of you and your family. You are a special and strong person. ((HUGS))


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## MInx (Jun 10, 2008)

*



Awww, you know I don't get on here a lot anymore Marty but you also know I love you and think of you very often and I did remember this date was coming up.*

As usual your post was elegant, tasteful, warm and wonderful.

I watched all three videos..the first was perfect.Had never heard this before.

Bless you, Dan and Jerry with all my heart, Maxine and carl


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## Casnos Minis (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty,

I've been thinking of you guys all day. Hugs to you all. You have been there for me and I want to return the favor.

Christy


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## luckymeacres (Jun 10, 2008)

We are thinking of you today and wishing you peace.


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## wildoak (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty, it's hard to imagine that it has been two years. I know in my experience it just doesn't seem right that times keeps on going when you lose someone precious to you. The world should come to a standstill out of respect for your loss, but that's not the reality of it. Life keeps on for the rest of us and we learn to cope for better or worse. Thinking of you and your family today especially, {{hugs}}.

Jan


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## Vicky Texas (Jun 10, 2008)

Oh Marty

Dan and Jerry

I still can't believe he is gone, and really can't believe its been 2 years today. Wow, so

heart breaking. Still so heart breaking, I feel your sadness, and your pain. I know we have

spent many of times together on the phone and crying.

I only know Michael is watching over you all, he still loves you so much, and nothing will

ever change that, nothing. He will always love you, and be in your hearts. And I do know

one day, you will all be there with him. What a reuion it will be. In the mean time

we are still here and will always be here for you. We all love you guys, and you mean

so much to me.

The poem, wow, so heart breaking, its like re-living that day all over again, and I know

you all do every day. It was so hard to read, and so heart breaking.

We all miss you Michael, and will always have a special place in our hearts for you. And

one day, we will see you again or get to meet you for the first time.

Hugs and prayers to help you

Vicky


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## Valerie (Jun 10, 2008)

I am thinking of you all.

Valerie


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## Gini (Jun 10, 2008)

Marty

Know the love that we all have for your family... May we all be a comfort to you, Jerry and Dan thru these

days. Know we LOVE our MARTY!!!!!


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## MiniforFaith (Jun 11, 2008)

Marty, Jerry and Dan..

I know I have been in my own little world worrying how we are going to make it, but I did think of all of you today. I even had a candle lit for Michael, as I have ever since his tragic accident..I know You really don't know me, but you have posted on my posts.. This forum is a big family and we are always here for you and your family.. We might not be able to take away the pain, but we are here for you when you need an eye(shoulder to cry on) We will now and for always



Even though We have never met, I feel like we have threw all of your posts.. Just want to sent some extra hugs and love on today, as today and everyday on this date will be hard.. So sending love to you and your family from PA.



Love ya Marty,Jerry and Dan!!






Sending prayers your way..


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## CyndiM (Jun 11, 2008)

I'm sorry I didn't get on here earlier to send my ((((HUGS)))) and let you know you have been in my thoughts and prayers for the past few days. I knew this date was coming up and I lit a candle for all of you. That is a beautiful poem you posted. Michael is still with you, he will always be close by your side.


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## bluetaterbaby (Jun 11, 2008)

Marty,

I'm so sorry for your pain. I can't imagine what you're feeling. I'm sure the hurting never stops. The poem was beautiful and the videos were as well. We all pray for you and your family. We're here for you. You're such a wonderful person and we appreciate you very much. You bring so much laughter to our hearts; give great advice; have mega-talents; and such a great mom!





God bless,

Joan


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## OhHorsePee (Jun 11, 2008)

From my heart to yours, Marty.


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## HGFarm (Jun 11, 2008)

It is hard to believe it's been two years now! My heart goes out to you and yours, and I dont think the pain ever goes away- It may lessen some in dozens of years, but it will never go....

Marty, I DO remember when you wrote and posted that because I read it here at work and was bawling my eyes out at my desk! Hang tough girl, you are an amazing woman, that is all I can say, and hope that we can meet in person some day.


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## Sunny (Jun 11, 2008)

Oh, Marty. I can hardly believe it's two years already. I heard the news from KayKay and Fran at the Ashland show. I had just met them five minutes earlier and it ws just about the first thing we talked about. I couldn't believe it then, and I still can't hardly believe it. The poem you posted is absolutely beautiful, while heartwrenching at the same time.

I join with all your other friends and family on here and offer you my love and heartfelt support. Big warm hugs to you, Jerry and Dan.


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## flflyingw (Jun 11, 2008)

To Michael, Dan, Jerry, Marty and Friends

Michael is truly a lucky son to have such a kind caring family. Marty thank you for sharing all your love that you have for your son and to help us remember the good times you had with him and the love he has for you and everyone.

I now feel at peace. Donna


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