# I need advice on a difficult donkey



## GlacierRidge (Aug 10, 2008)

First I want to say I am drawn to this girl, I really love her. But...many days, I love her so much I can't stand to look at her. Today is one of those days. So frustration is talking here...but perhaps the best time for me to get the right words out. Just the simple task of trimming feet. NOT. Nothing is simple with this girl. Almost nothing. But for some reason, I really like her and don't want to let her go. I want to hope we can overcome this. But, I've had her for a year now. Nothing has changed.

Bit of background...she's 7 years old now, I got her last summer. She'd been in the home I got her from since they bought her as a foal. She was an only donkey that whole time, and had the companionship of a goat. She seemed happy...since it was really all she knew, how would she know much different!? The people who owned her loved her very much. But, she was a pet, and I'm sure quite spoiled. They did teach her to drive. I give them much credit! She does drive, and she's WONDERFUL in front of a cart! ONCE you get her hitched. Harnessing and hitching her takes a lot of people, and a lot of time. She rears, throws a fit, lays down between the shafts while you're hitching...just throws a hissy fit. This is her way of life to get out of doing things she doesn't want to do. Once she's hitched, she's good as gold, does everything that's asked of her, and seems to love her job as a driving donkey. But I rarely drive her because of the fiasco involved in getting there. And for a little snot, she's awfully strong, and I don't usually have help.

My donkeys wear fly masks....with the donkey ears, because the insides of their ears get so bit up. But Gracey's stays on at night too....because it takes two people to GET it on. First I have to tie her tight, then one person STILL has to hold her while the other puts it on. She's not scared of it....she just enjoys being difficult I swear! I have messed with her ears all winter long....she's ok with it....because I learned last winter what "fun" the fly mask was, and thought that messing with her ears before fly mask season would help.

Hoof trimming...she rears, lays down, throws herself around, kicks....you name it, she does it. She'll ram herself into you....I've been in tears over this donkey...I love her and want to enjoy her....but just don't know if I'll ever be able to get this "streak" out of her? I'm new to donkeys as of last summer.....I bought both of my donkeys the same week from different sides of the state. The other one is good as gold....

Is there hope for she and I? Is there anything I can do? I want a partnership with her....not this constant fighting...butting heads....over EVERYTHING! Only time she's good is for grooming....usually. And treats....of course, but she gets so incredibly pushy with those that I quit giving treats as well. Too nippy and pushing me around.

I hope for as much advice as I can get. I don't want to let her go...I'm hoping for some hope!

Angie


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## MeadowRidge Farm (Aug 10, 2008)

gee, are you sure you didnt come and take Earl on me???...



It sure sounds like him when we first got him, from Wyoming. he is a standard. When we got him home, my hubby had him out on a lead..he HATED woman. I thought ...honkey dorey, and I have to go in and clean his stall. Of course we didnt know he hated woman (he was a rescue...hmmm, wonder why???) but found THAT out really fast! He would charge at me, and if he got within striking range kick. I used a poll rope on him, which is something I really REALLY do hate to use, but I had no choice, and once he got use to me..I started training like we were right back at step one, and that he had never known a thing in his life. He was also very spoiled from his previous owner who was a man. Its been 3 years now, and he is great with me, and wonderful in his training. He would flip over when trying to do his hooves, now he stands perfect. He has turned into the barn clown and everyone loves him. Still spoiled, but he always will be. I wuold never part with him now. The only advice I can say is to start her like she knows nothing, and go forward from there. Just be sure she is being retrained like a donkey should be...not like you are working with a horse. Donkeys are very prone to hands..keep them low all the time never raise them above her wither area. Its going to take alot of patience but will be so well worth it in the end. There really is hope for working her out of her bad problems. REALLY.


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## GlacierRidge (Aug 10, 2008)

Thank you for your reply! Perhaps I need a lesson in the difference between donkeys and horses....as far as the "low hands" you mention? Not over the withers? She is as difficult as my other one is easy. They are like night and day. Thing is with Gracey, she can be difficult with men and women alike. And she seems to choose who she REALLY dislikes. I had a friend who lived with us for 7 months, and kept her horses here as well. She'd help with barn chores, etc, and help with Gracey, as far as harnessing, or even simple things like getting her fly mask on. Gracey HATED her. The very first day she met her, my friend walked out into the paddock, and little Gracey acted like she was MOUNTING her! Reared up on her hind legs as if to give her "a hug." Of course...I'm sure that's the last thing she was doing. It all went downhill from there. We learned quickly that she just wasn't going to like this person. She seems to like me....just as long as I'm not asking her to do something she doesn't feel like doing! Like putting her flymask on, or standing for a trim....typical stuff that needs to be done (well, the fly mask isn't a necessity I know....but the trimming is!). I know it won't help make things better...but I've thought it has almost come to the point of tranquilizing her to trim her! She's a silly little mini donkey! But she's a tough little thing....

As long as I am asking nothing of her....if I bring her in, tie her and am just grooming her, talking to her, petting her, she's fine. But ask her to hold up a foot for too long.....and she goes beserk. And as I said before, because of the fight to harness and hitch her, I don't even drive her anymore. And once she was in front of the cart, we both seemed to really enjoy ourselves so much. But the stress involved getting there just isn't worth it....and I can't do it alone.

I'm glad to hear that your donkey overcame his issues.... I really want to hold onto hope for her. I have always wished I could take her places....do things with her.... but I've come to the realization that that just won't happen. I could just imagine having an audience with one of her little hissy fits. I talk to her....I move slowly...she's not spooky or nervous.....she's just....VERY OPINIONATED.

At times I've thought...ok, I'll lunge her a little, maybe I can tire her out a little, get her mind on me....nope. Lunging doesn't work. She goes HER speed...if she wants to walk, she's gonna walk...no matter what. I don't think a freight train would speed her up! But I love her.... I want to learn how to help me help her.... or help me do things right....whatever it takes....I'd love for us to be on the same page....but at this point, I'll even take the same book!

Angie


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## MeadowRidge Farm (Aug 10, 2008)

I am sure you will do just fine ...EVENTUALLY. The biggest problem I have seen people make with there donkeys is try to train them just like a horse. When you work with donkeys you should try to keep your hands down as low as possible, because anything that is above there withers is coming across to the donkey as aggressive. I think along time back I did a full thread on some tips when you work with them. (not 150% sure on that...



) you could look thru some of my old post and if you dont fine it...I could do another one of helpful training tips and everyone could add theres.


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## FlatCreekFarm (Aug 11, 2008)

A thread on working with a "difficult" donkey would be wonderful



My Ruby (in avatar) is actually more cooperative with leading than sweet little Gracie. However, hoof-trimming and various other things where Ruby is involved.... usually leads to someone getting black and blue (and it's not her of course). What a pistol she can be, and she has a long list of strategies she tries for hoof-trimming, etc. Much like Angie's Gracey ~ lying down, jumping, kicking etc. It really can get ugly!! Love her to pieces, but any tips on dealing with these 'strong-willed children' would be great!!


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## GlacierRidge (Aug 11, 2008)

I am really glad to hear I am not the only one who's trying to be trained by a donkey. lol

And I will try to find your post. But if someone finds it before I do...please bump it up!!

Thank you!

Angie


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## GlacierRidge (Aug 11, 2008)

(Gracey looks a lot like Ruby!) My avatar is Kochia, my sweet, gentle, pregnant soul...

Gracey is fine on a lead.....so maybe more like Ruby in other ways too! She used to be naughty to tie too...but she's gotten a lot better there. I should say, she's fine on the lead as long as I'm not doing something she doesn't like! LOL Leading is fine!

Angie


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## RJRMINIS (Aug 12, 2008)

Well you will probably get a laugh out of this but Bribery gets me everywhere



.........My girls love treats....and most are good for hoof trimming but the ones that are not, that throw the fits....Well lets just say I bribe with cookies...haha They are so darn smart too, and ones that will rear and flop around, AMAZINGLY stand perfect to be trimmed as long as they are getting cookies. Ok, so this is not the "right" way to do it, but considering it works....well we go with what works, I would much rather have a easy going trim than flopping all over or rearing and getting hurt.


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## Emily's mom (Aug 14, 2008)

The hoof trimming sounds like Emily, she thrashes around eventually she lays down and it gets done. The fly spray was another thing, she is much better now, but earlier this spring she'd run, she started to run into her stall where we pinned her to the wall and sprayed her, after weeks she decided it did not hurt her. My Max is a peach!!


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