# I found a little body in the pasture today...



## shoeboxstables (Feb 16, 2008)

Today was a sad day at shoebox stables. We found the body of a dear friend in the pasture. For educational purposes, I have included photos of the scene. Please, do not scroll down if you are feint of heart.






Today, I discovered, the BIG RED BALL....

had been MURDERED!

The scene was much like that of Grandma's, in the fabled christmas song 'Grandma got run over by a reindeer'.






Upon casing the crime area, we found some evidence:






Hoof prints, surrounding the ball. We have concluded that the ball was BRUTALIZED and PAWED to death.

Hay, which we have swabbed for a DNA sample. Results should be in soon.

We recovered a partial hoof print from the ball, the suspect would wear about a size 0 shoe, and we have about 2 points of identification for the suspect. They did not match any prints on file.

After being taken to the morgue, we asked Vic, a friend of the ball, to identify the body.

It was an emotional scene, as Victorio Hawk identified the body to be THE BIG RED BALL.






We are currently invesitgating the case, and have a number of suspects.

SUSPECT 1: V. HAWK






Aliases: 'Vic', 'Victorio', 'Mr. Hawk'

-Last living creature to interact with the desceased.

-Seen last only 20 feet from where the body was recovered

-Has had a rough relationship with THE BIG RED BALL

THE FOLLOWING PHOTOGRAPHS HAVE BEEN TAKEN FROM FILES CONTAINING COMPLAINTS ABOUT MR. HAWK'S ROUGH, AND ABUSIVE TREATMENT TOWARDS BALLS.











Seen here only last sunday, BEATING the late BIG RED BALL






Curiously enough, that BLUE BALL has been MIA for almost a year now, after associating with V. HAWK

SUSPECT 2: W. DIAMONDS






Aliases: 'Diva' 'Doll' 'The Lady Di'

-Has known fear, and HATRED towards balls

-Has a RESTRAINING ORDER out AGAINST the late ball

-Has a history of VIOLENCE towards balls

-Harbors a well-known crush on V. HAWK, who has been spending a lot of time with the Late BIG RED BALL

........... A crime of jelousy?? of passion????

THE FOLLOWING PHOTOGRAPHS HAVE BEEN TAKEN FROM FILES CONTAINING INFORMATION ABOUT MISS DIAMONDS' RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST THE LATE BIG RED BALL.











THE PUBLIC IS CAUTIONED, MISS DIAMONDS MAY BE DISGUISED AS A BAY HORSE- OR PINTO. THIS IS A COMMON ACT. DO NOT BE FOOLED.






SUSPECT 3: J. ROGER






Aliases: 'Baby Dodge'

-Ex-compainion of the late ball

-Love/Hate relationship with balls

-Envious of V. HAWKS relationship with the ball??

-Has been EMBARRESSED by the late ball

...... REVENGE?????











THE PUBLIC IS WARNED OF THE EXTREME NATURE OF THIS CRIME. UNTIL THE PERP IS IN CUSTODY, PLEASE, LOCK UP YOUR TACK ROOMS, CLOSE YOUR DOORS, PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN, AND PLEASE.... HIDE ANDYTHING ROUND AND BOUNCY IN NATURE. WE DO NOT WANT A REPEAT OF THIS CRIME.

IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION THAT MAY ASSIST THE DECTECTIVES INVESTIGATING THIS CRIME, PLEASE CALL 1-5-I-SAW-IT.

A candle-lit memorial service will be held tonight for families and friends of The Big Red Ball.


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## Vicky Texas (Feb 16, 2008)

Oh My I hope the find the killer of the big RED BALL, and ask if he/she killed the Big Yellow

Ball in our paddocts. Gabriel would like to know who killed his favorite ball too?

Gabriel has been on the hunt.. he loved his ball. I have tried several other balls, but our

donkey Eeyore OH! sats on them, and they died.

Best wishes on your hunt

Vicky


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## ponyboi09 (Feb 16, 2008)

LOL. Thats horrible, who could do such a thing.

Will


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## Miniequine (Feb 16, 2008)

OMG, What a tragedy.

Thank you for the warning. We will take every

precausion with our red ball.

After looking closely at the pictures.. I'm wondering

if a patch and some oxygen therapy would return

your ball to a some sort of life??

Also,,, I noticed the way those perps are chatting at the fenceline...

perhaps trying to get their stories straight??? Very Interesting......

I only hope you resolve this quickly.

~Sandy


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## love_casper (Feb 16, 2008)

What a tragedy, I feel your loss! Hope they find out who did it, do tell us when your court sentence is!

Hahaha thanks for sharing.


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## SWA (Feb 16, 2008)

Bye-bye Big Red Ball, if you see "Big Blue Ball" some where up there in Rainbow Ball Heaven, please say hello for me?



Tell her she's thought of often. We're still looking for Big Purple Ball, Blue Ball's sister. She went missing the day we found Blue Ball, mysteriously found slung over the "other side of the fence". That might have been a clever ploy to throw us off any local suspects. Or by some stretch of imagination, I guess it could be possible that your lead suspect could have gone berzerk and paid our little town a visit and cruely took the life of our sweet Blue Ball and taken her sister, Purple Ball, hostage. If you see any evidence of Purple Ball, please notify our local authorities, ASAP! We miss her dearly.

Our stallion, Rolex, says thought he saw "something" lurking out there...






But we questioned him extensively, and he couldn't positively identify anyone in particular.





So we questioned little Bridget, as Purple Ball was her bestest friend...

All she's been able to do since Purple Ball went missing is sleep and dream of they day Purple Ball would come home. Here she is, as we woke her from her nap for questioning...






She was stunned when we woke her so suddenly for questioning, and says "I dunno, Purple Ball was right here next to me, as we were both very tired from our recent play, and when I woke up, she was just GONE



, and that's when they found Blue Ball, just beyond the pasture wall.



Oh it was horrible.





We just don't know what happened. So, PLEASE, if you see or hear anything that might lead us to where Purple Ball could be, please let us know.

WARNING to all you Ball Terrorizers out there... Bad boy, very, very BAD boy!



This has GOT to stop somewhere!

Shoe Box, we join you in your sorrow of your sweet Big Red Ball.


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## Debd (Feb 16, 2008)

That was too funny! Gotta love solving those crime mysteries.


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## eagles ring farm (Feb 16, 2008)

our ball is yellow and smaller

can I assume it's safe?

or should I put it under lock and key


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## Equuisize (Feb 16, 2008)

Your notice gave me a serious start...

Whew! Green Ball is safely tucked in the horse

trailer under the bridge waiting for spring.

Although we are glad our ball is safe, the 'kids'

and I send our condolences. We understand

how very sad you must be today.

Be strong for each other.


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## shoeboxstables (Feb 16, 2008)

Thank you all for your kind words on this somber day. :no

We did attempt CPR, but the body was cold, and lifeless. It did not respond to treatment.

I am comforted to know that THE BIG RED BALL will be welcomed into Ball-y heaven by so many friends.

Thank you friends.


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## Bassett (Feb 16, 2008)

ROFL










That was funny.

My horses murder their balls too . But one day I caught Mike with a small piece of rubber in his mouth. Luckily I got it before he swallowed it. So it is possible they are dangerous after they are murdered.


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## shoeboxstables (Feb 16, 2008)

Yeah, the body was removed shortly after identification. The Big Red Ball actually lasted about 3 years! It was a great, great, friend to many in it's long, productive life.


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## StellaLenoir (Feb 16, 2008)

thank you for this super funny thread!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love how you wrote out the descriptions of the suspects and all. You should make it into a childrens book!

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO funny!!!!!!


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## AppyLover2 (Feb 16, 2008)

Well this horrible tragedy may or may not have a happy ending.....but I, for one, sure enjoyed hearing all the gory details.

Look out Dean Koontz!! There's a new writer on the horizon.


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## Charlene (Feb 16, 2008)

this is a horrible, HORRIBLE crime!



is there no justice in the world??



i do hope you find the perp and when you do, he/she should be fed marshmallows UNTIL HE/SHE CONFESSES!!! OH!

by the way, you realize of course, our system demands that we treat the culprit as innocent until proven guilty. if you do, in fact, get a confession, we shall throw caution to the wind. however, if no confession is forthcoming, he/she will have to go to trial before a jury of his/her peers, none of which can be ohhh, say...35" tall. if this proceeds to trial and it is proven beyond a reasonable doubt that the defendant did, in fact, *gasp!!* MURDER the big red ball, well, anything goes. but WAIT....

just how DOES one punish a....a.....a...*gasp!!*...BALL MURDERER???





ohhhh the humaaaanity!!!


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## Jill (Feb 16, 2008)

The ghost of Red Ball says he never saw it coming from his "good friend", Vic!!!


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## A Yankee In NC (Feb 16, 2008)

Oh my gosh! I am so glad that you posted this warning! I have taken "Big White Ball" and loked her away safely!

I hope that you find the culprit!


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## barnbum (Feb 16, 2008)

When I'm done laughing I'll light a candle.


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## barefoot (Feb 16, 2008)

LOL





Is there any chance that the big red ball died of natural causes? Perhaps a leaky valve or cracked from sun exposure?

Did you find any injuries? A puncture wound?

So sorry for your loss.


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## 4mymirage (Feb 16, 2008)

Oh no! I was reading your post with great concern. And then I went out to the pasture to ensure the safety of the balls who reside here...and ...The Ball Murderer has come south... look what we found tonight at feeding time:











I think you will have to expand your suspect list!!

Or did one of the suspects borrow your truck and trailer today??


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## shalamara minis (Feb 16, 2008)

when i pick my self up off the floor I'll write something


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## The Simple Life Farm (Feb 17, 2008)

OMG!!!








I know you must be in terrible shock!!! What a horrific murder scene. I don't know how you were able to compose yourself enough to take the pictures. It is such a graphic scene, I have never seen such horror. Keep pressure on your suspects, they will eventually turn on the guilty one!!! You might consider calling in CSI or the FBI if this goes unsolved much longer.

When is The Big Red Ball being put to rest? I will keep you and your family in my


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## 1 is not enough (Feb 17, 2008)

Too cute! Thanks I needed a good laugh!


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## Matt73 (Feb 17, 2008)

That was too funny. Great job!


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## Charlene (Feb 17, 2008)

4mymirage said:


> Oh no! I was reading your post with great concern. And then I went out to the pasture to ensure the safety of the balls who reside here...and ...The Ball Murderer has come south... look what we found tonight at feeding time:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


this is simply dreadful. could there be a serial ball killer on the loose? that does it, i'm locking up the big gray ball this instant!!!

CIRCLE THE WAGONS EVERYONE!!!


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## CheyAut (Feb 17, 2008)

I am so sorry for your tragic loss. What a horrible thing! Please let us know the details of the services.

Jessi


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## Cricket (Feb 18, 2008)

Too Funny



!!!!!


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## Relic (Feb 18, 2008)

Sorry about your Big Red Ball such a senseless loss.



We've never had an actual murder but have found many victums of harsh beatings on some of our pasture balls it's always sad to stumble across them laying half hidden in the tall grass or in the snow. l found this poor blue ball a while ago frozen into the snow who looked like he took a pretty good beating but still had some life left. l had to kick him out of the snow and when he landed a few feet away he was flat on the other side and had a hard time rolling...


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## RobinRTrueJoy (Feb 18, 2008)

Tooo funny!!!!!

But you know,

I think there may be a serial killer in our midst. I have found the deflated bodies of balls in our pastures for several years now and never connected the murders. Hmmmmm. gotta call CSI. My only clue is that the ball's bodies always seem to show up in the stallions pens.

Robin


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## jacks'thunder (Feb 19, 2008)

OMG!!! I loved this!!!! You just made my day!!!! This was great!!!!!












Leya


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## PaintedMeadows (Feb 19, 2008)

Man, you are so funny!! I love it! I hope you find the culprit before more innocent balls lose their lives! lol


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## Cara (Feb 19, 2008)

omg i thought horse died at first, eek lol but poor ball i think it was the first horse


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## shoeboxstables (Feb 19, 2008)

Thank you all for your kind words. The Big Red Ball has been laid to rest.

However, the crime still remains unsolved!!! I will be conducting interviews with the suspects tomorrow, and will be sharing the results online. I hope that your little round ones are al faring well, and wish the lost ones a safe trip to ball-y heaven!!!


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## C G Minis (Feb 20, 2008)

Thank you for that.I needed a good laugh !! Way too funny.


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## StarRidgeAcres (Feb 21, 2008)

I believe Robin is correct. We have a serial ball killer amongst us! I think we have to seriously consider the suspect to be a show horse because these deaths are occuring all over and who else would have access to that much travel??? I ask you? It must be a show horse!!



They can make quick escapes via major highways and be hundreds a miles away before anyone even knows a crime has been committed. Know what I mean?


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## Sterling (Feb 21, 2008)

OMG...I scrolled down...but very gingerly...after seeing what this thread was about I



Whew!!!

Seing how the OP is from Blairstown NJ...same state I'm in....I did a look-up on serial ball deflaters and came up empty.





However in one of my searches I found this culprit. The infamous Jersey Devil.....






A short excerpt collected from the internet files of this historic creature is as follows....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Mr. and Mrs. Nelson spotted the animal cavorting on their shed for ten straight minutes; police officers filed reports of shooting at it; and even a Trenton city councilman (name withheld in the source material) claimed an encounter. He had heard a hissing sound at his doorstep late one night. When he opened the door, he found cloven hoofprints in the snow. These bizarre footprints were turning up all over the New Jersey, Philadelphia, and Delaware region.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today, there are only a few, isolated sightings of the Jersey Devil. It seems as though the paved roads, electric lights and modern conventions that have come to the region over the course of two and a half centuries have driven the monster so far into hiding that it has vanished altogether. The lack of proof of the monster’s existence in these modern times leads many to believe the Devil was nothing more than a creation of New Jersey folklore. But was it really?

If it was merely a myth, then how do we explain the sightings of the creature and the witness accounts from reliable persons like businessmen, police officers and even public officials? They are not easy to dismiss as hearsay or the result of heavy drinking. Could the Jersey Devil have been real after all? And if so, is it still out there in the remote regions of the Pine Barrens - just waiting to be found?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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## markadoodle (Feb 22, 2008)

lol hmmmmmmmm --------and i wondered y that tire was smushed


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## JourneysEnd (Apr 15, 2008)

I was just curious if anyone was ever brought to justice for the murder of the Big Red Ball.

That and I wanted to try and bump this to current for everybody who missed the funniest thread I've ever read.


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## RockRiverTiff (Apr 15, 2008)

Oh that's terrible. I actually cried. (Yes, I laughed so hard I actually cried.) We have had some ball hate crimes in our area too, but nothing so outright malicious. I hope you found the criminal that did this, so balls can once again roam your pastures safely.


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## AceyHorse (Apr 15, 2008)

I needed a good laugh today! thanks


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## tnovak (Apr 16, 2008)

Yep-better call CSI and get them DNA samples processed.

By the way, my mare still has her hospital basin-she is abusive to it, tho-I may have to rehome it.

AND just wanted to let you know I peed my pants laughing so hard reading this thread!


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## Sanny (Jun 18, 2008)

I missed this when it was first posted because I don't look at the photo gallery, but this is one of the funniest posts I have ever read. LOVE the story and the pictures!!!


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## OhHorsePee (Jun 18, 2008)

LOL So funny! I loved it. Thank you for making me laugh!!


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## lilhorseladie (Jun 18, 2008)

I too hadn't seen this, and it was funny as can be!


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## Cara (Jun 18, 2008)

wow your funny, i have seen this before but it still got me lol


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