# Bullying problem-long need advice



## wade3504 (Nov 23, 2010)

OK, this all started last week as they walked home from school. A boy who my 10 year old daughter knows and lives in our apartment complex spit on her multiple times on the way home from school. I got a call from her on her cell with her telling me that a boy was bothering her to please come get her. I dropped everything and ran to my car. I get to where she is at and there are two boys standing with her along with my son. She gets in and I ask where is the boy who did it? She tells me as she's closing the door that it's not either of them that the boy ran. I asked what his name was and where did he go as we start driving. She proceeds tell me that it was one of the boys that she had been standing with afraid to walk away as they tried to convince her not to tell because he would get kicked out of school. Well, she's in safety patrol and knew that she should tell so she did. They got called into the office at school and of course the boy said that nothing would happen after that, he was sorry , etc. etc. It also came out that he grabbed her breast and twisted as well. He admitted to having done this. Then yesterday my daughter and son go outside. I can see the playground from our apartment and didn't realize they were out there. They threw pizza crust at her rocks, and shells, called her names that I can't type here, and the one who started it all (the ones doing the current actions are his besst friends) said he wished the rocks had hit her as one of them chases her as she comes running to the apartment for me. I spoke to one as I sat outside waiting for him to come back for his bike that he had forgotten when he ran and the other ones mother we know where he lives but she is never home. He is watched by mom's "friend" or has to stay with another friend in the complex who has no better supervision than he does. I've come to learn that I don't want to live in a big city (Palm Beach, FL) and that even though apartments may look really nice and we live in a gated community that really says nothing-I kind of knew that before but I am ever the optomist. We made sure we moved into a decent neighborhood when we moved here or so we thought.

So, my problem is that the situation is escalating. I plan on being outside with her and my son when they go out to play and walk the dogs. The mother of the main boy doesn't care, the other second in command apologizes then turns around and does something again. The school has now washed their hands of it as it is now happening at home. They tried to assure us that nothing would happen again and that if anything happened even at home to let them know. Well, that was useless as they are doing nothing now. This boy waits for her to get done with safety patrol after school, but was shocked when he saw me waiting for her to walk home with her and my son. I am now picking them up or their grandmother is. Today he skipped school with his best bud here in the apartment complex and they were waiting on the wall to the opening of the apartment complex after school and checked to make sure she was inside my mother in laws car as she drove by then walked away. My mother in law goes and finds them and talks to them and she thinks its going to end now. We've already done this. Now I don't know what to do and I am looking for opinions or other experiences and what you have done. I considered putting her in another school but she has a trip to Washington in January for Safelty patrol and this is her last year in this school. So that would be a punishment to her. I've considered keeping them in but again punishment to her. If he gets kicked out of school it doesn't matter as I can see his apartment. Our lease is not up until October of 2011. Plus now my daughter is learning that if she says something nothing good comes of it and only bad things happen so I am worried that later on in life something even worse will happen and she won't say anything. I am at a loss besides sticking with her at all times and then they'll make fun of her for that. Any ideas would be appreciated.

Amanda


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## cretahillsgal (Nov 23, 2010)

If she were my daughter, I would be calling the police. Sure, they are kids, but you need to report it to somebody. Think what this boy will be doing to girls when he gets older if he is not stopped.


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## Watcheye (Nov 23, 2010)

Yep Police was my thought.


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## wade3504 (Nov 23, 2010)

I have considered that as well but wasn't sure what they'd do about ten year olds. I'm thinking they'll go to the parents who don't care and it will continue. I am logging everything though and with the first incident two crossing guards were involved as a truck pulled over to tell them what was happening. I've just looked up harassment and even though it was for adults he fits the bill. I am worried about what will happen if we continue to say something and he continues to act upon it.


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## REO (Nov 23, 2010)

Call the police! It doesn't matter what their age is. Nowadays, kids as young as 9 go to schools with guns and shoot people. Police take young kids seriously now. These kids are headed that way unless they're stopped NOW! If they think they can get away with it, it'll get worse & worse.

And the cops will then have it on file. This NEEDS to be done.

It's not going to stop. In fact, now that you're protecting her (GOOD FOR YOU!!) if they ever catch her alone.......... because they'll want to catch up for lost time.

Doing what they're doing isn't just bullying, it's assult.

Please report it to the police!


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## Bess Kelly (Nov 23, 2010)

CALL THE POLICE!!! Get a restraining order, also. Do not let this escalate. He needs to go to juvie. His parents need to go, too


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## ~Lisa~ (Nov 23, 2010)

I think you need to be prepared to get some sort of evidence if you are going to call the police maybe video them or something?

MOst of it I think they will say is just school yard stuff they might talk to the boys but not sure that will stop them

*HOWEVER...*the fact that he grabbed her breast is a whole different story and that is something I would go to the police and file a report about. They might not be able to do anything but it is not normal behavior for a 10 yr old and at least there will be some record of his behavior.


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## FoRebel (Nov 23, 2010)

CALL THE POLICE! The fact that they grabbed her breast is sexual assault! Make a report and also makes sure to include all the assaults against her before too! This needs to stop and I really think the only way is to have charges brought against the boys.

P.S. All you will need to make the report is your statement and your daughter's statement. If your son has seen any of this he will need to make a statement also!


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## Marty (Nov 23, 2010)

BUILD A BRIDGE.

I have a little different take on this having dealt with some little characters in my time. How do you think I helped keep my Floridian boys from getting their teeth knocked out up here from a bunch of wild hillbilly kids when they were little? If you threaten, fight them, avoid them, they win so you need to face it head on and calmly as much as you want to knock their heads together, be calm. Pure and simple, you need to friend them, especially the one you think is the leader, go after him first and the hardest. I would attempt to friend these boys and talk to them about what they have been up to. Go to where they are playing around and invite them to have a sit and for the love pete, bring a plate of brownies. Yes I do mean bring brownies or a couple of bags of chips and have them all sit down together with your kids and talk with them while they have their mouths full. Do not try to be "proper". Relax. Talk to them in language they understand.... You need to find your middle-ground of knowing how to talk to them being nice, but also at the same time being firm so they will respect you. This is a ruff example of the conversation I'd be having with them to bring them over to our side: "Hey guys, I know you can be awesome, but what the heck is going on? You guys know that what you did was totally uncool and could have gotten you in a lot of trouble. You know there is nothing cool about being a bad "axe" and you need to chill and be the good guys we know you can be. And let there be no mistake if you mess up again, I'm not going to put up with any of it and you will go down." Now, be sure to LISTEN to them and whatever you do, do not engage. Just listen. If they use bad language do not acted shocked, just say "Hey Man, don't use that kind of mouth like that when you are speaking with me, ok?" Remember these are little kids too who apparently have little to no guidance. Encourage them to play together while you sit there and watch. Actually when in this situation with my boys I encouraged them all to form a neighborhood "club" where they would hold meetings up at the fishing pond and come up with stuff to do. Try it.


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## SampleMM (Nov 23, 2010)

Have you talked with anyone on the school board? I had a bad bullying situation going on with the bus driver of all people.



I tried to stop it by going to the school principal and I called the bus co. owner several times but it seemed to go nowhere. So, guess what happened........I ended up having to drive my kids an hour a day just to get them to and from school. This year, I had the kids ride one time, and that lovely bus driver started with his harassment but this time I got a member of the school board involved. Within 48 hours my kids were placed on another bus and this idiot had to apologize if he wanted to keep his job. He taunted my son about being overweight and called him terrible names. I hate bullies and I'm sorry but I could never sit down with these kids. These are the type of kids who lead other kids to be suicidal. It has happened right at our local school and we are in smalltown, USA. I would get the school board, apartment manager and the police involved ASAP.


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## Minimor (Nov 24, 2010)

I would call the police & make a complaint. At least tell them what has been going on (the spitting as well as everything else. It might be helpful if you have a list of dates when things happened--if you are documenting everything, that is good. Tell them about this & see if they can do anything, or if they need something more--a witness, a video.

Spitting on someone, particularly in the face, is often considered to be assault--at least it is when adults are involved.


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## sfmini (Nov 24, 2010)

I would think their parents could be held accountable at the least if you go to the police. I agree with others, while I like Marty's thoughts, these are really bad times, and the sexual assault part is beyond bullying. I would also get the school board involved since the teachers and principal don't seem to take this seriously.

I am seeing too much crap in the news these days about these poor kids getting bullied and killing themselves because they see no way out.

Is another school an option after she goes on her trip?

I am not a parent, but I would love to get a hold on those little jerks. I don't think it is up to you to try to fix another parent's shortcomings, the parents, school authorities, and police should be handling that.

Let us know how things turn out.


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## Sonya (Nov 24, 2010)

I am not a parent either but just wanted to say I'm sorry this is happening. I agree, get the police involved, this is not bullying, this is assault and harasement.


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## Ashley (Nov 24, 2010)

I would say the police and the landlord. Let him/her know whats going on. They may or may not let you out of your lease, but they may do something about the other kid so they dont get more complaints from other families.


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## minih (Nov 24, 2010)

> I hate bullies and I'm sorry but I could never sit down with these kids. These are the type of kids who lead other kids to be suicidal. It has happened right at our local school and we are in smalltown, USA. I would get the school board, apartment manager and the *police involved ASAP*.


My thoughts exactly, only I also bolded the last part! Good luck and keep us posted.


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## Sue_C. (Nov 24, 2010)

Sorry Marty, I generally agree with what you have to say...but in this case, nope, just cannot. These boys have assaulted and harassed this girl. They have grabbed her breast...and twisted it, with intent to do harm...they have spit in her face. How do you think she would feel if her parents started making friends with these boys?? Imagine what it would do to her self-esteem to have to "be nice" to these boys? She is 10 years old...this kind of crap will follow her for the rest of her life...and IMO, to befriend these kids will give her the signal (and them too, I am thinking) that this is the norm, and is acceptable behavior. No [email protected]#%& way I say...call the police, and have THEM knock on their doors and give them a talking to. We read in the papers of boys raping little girls...and some of them haven't been more than a year or two older than these boys...


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## REO (Nov 24, 2010)

Thank you Sue C for saying exactly what I wanted to say. You wrote it perfectly.

Living in fear is no way to live.


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## wade3504 (Nov 24, 2010)

Ok, here is what is going on. Nothing else has happened between them since I posted this. My husband is not ready to go to the police. Since his mother talked to the boys he wants to wait and see if it stops. I don't agree but I am step mom so I must wait and keep the documentation handy. If she goes out tomorrow I will be watching through the lense of a video camera. Supposedly he is mad because Becca is not his friend-this is what he told my mother in law. Well, duh, harass me and I won't be your friend either. He of course says it will stop now and my mother in law believes him. He has said this already. I have everything documented. I am keeping a close eye on her but I worry about when she is alone at school. I will keep everyone informed and thank you all for your advice. I too want to go to the police.


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## hobbyhorse23 (Nov 24, 2010)

sfmini said:


> I agree with others, while I like Marty's thoughts, these are really bad times, *and the sexual assault part is beyond bullying*. I would also get the school board involved since the teachers and principal don't seem to take this seriously. I am seeing too much crap in the news these days about these poor kids getting bullied and killing themselves because they see no way out.





Sue_C. said:


> Sorry Marty, I generally agree with what you have to say...but in this case, nope, just cannot. These boys have assaulted and harassed this girl. They have grabbed her breast...and twisted it, with intent to do harm...they have spit in her face. ... *We read in the papers of boys raping little girls...and some of them haven't been more than a year or two older than these boys...*


Honestly, I've got to agree with Marty to some extent. You cannot legislate away this kind of behavior. It doesn't work with adults and it doesn't work with kids! How many of us got bras snapped, pigtails dipped in inkwells (for some of you older gals



) and got called nasty names because we were too skinny, too fat, too flat or too round? Calling in the principal never helped. Neither did having our parents talk to their parents. All that does is teach them to be smarter and sneakier about the harassment so the adults don't catch them at it. What WORKS is making them see that the person they are harassing is human just like they are, and hurts just like they do. I know so many people who bullied me as a child who have come to me via FB or other venues as adults and let me know that they feel shame for what they did as kids. They were taking out their own pain on me because they didn't know any other way to deal with it.

What these boys are doing is WRONG. I'm not questioning that. But they will be hard-pressed to keep it up if they are forced to see your daughter as a person in her own right and not an object, an "other." If she can look the ringleader in the eye and say "What you did hurt my feelings. I've never done anything to hurt you and I don't deserve to be treated this way. Why are you being so mean?" I'll lay you odds that he won't be able to look her in the eye and the behavior will stop. They might even find out they have something in common and become friends. (Don't give me that look, it DOES happen.



I fought and scrapped for years with a girl I couldn't stand, probably bullied her a bit myself just like she did to me, and eventually to our mutual horror we found ourselves talking and beginning to realize the other person wasn't so bad after all. Neither one of us wanted to like the other but it just sort of happened!) Once the ringleader stops, so will his friends who are defending/supporting him.

Believe me, I know about wanting to commit suicide because of bullying. I came home in tears more days than I can remember and passionately hated going to school because of my peers. For me the answer was to become friends with my bus driver so I could sit behind her where the bullies didn't dare do anything, befriend my teacher so she would watch out for me, and I had a couple of close girlfriends who kept me sane and defended me (as I did them) on the playground. We fought with words because we were too small to fight back physically and sometimes...it even helped. I still wanted to drop out and be home-schooled!

Sometimes schools have peer mediation groups too, which can be an interesting way to get the two kids to sit down together and talk it out.

I think juvenile crimes should absolutely be taken seriously but so many times using "the system" to punish young toughs acting out of fear and loneliness only creates enraged, alienated adults who do even worse things. IMO, the only way to meet such behavior is with poise, compassion and firm boundaries. They need to be taught emotional intelligence.

Leia


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## Ashley (Nov 24, 2010)

well, at least you care about her cause apparently her father doesnt. Being a guy he wouldnt know what its like to be subject to harassment and the damage it will do to her, damage that cant be fixed.


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## Sue_C. (Nov 24, 2010)

> How many of us got bras snapped, pigtails dipped in inkwells (for some of you older gals
> 
> 
> 
> ...


There is a whole world of difference in being "teased", and being assaulted and spat upon. Yes, many of us had our bra strap snapped, pig-tails pulled and were teased by the boys as young girls...but in most cases, that is the silly way young boys try to get girl's attention...that is "normal" behavior. This...THIS...it-is-NOT.

If I saw a young boy being cruel to animals...I would report him. We now know that animal cruelty as a child, is often a sign of psychopathic behavior, to me...this boy, as young as he is, is showing some very frightening behavior as well. If not reported, and the parents don't care enough to stop it, and get him help, then who will ever know, until they read in the papers in a few years after it has escalated.


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## wade3504 (Nov 24, 2010)

OK Ashley, that was uncalled for. Her father does care but this is not an easy situation. What if the cops come talk to him and he gets even angrier? How would you explain to my husband why our daughter was stabbed, beaten whatever and the boy said he did it because we called the cops? This is a very difficult situation and you decide that my husband doesn't care? Unbelievable! He didn't say he wasn't going to at all. He said he was going to wait to see what happened after my mother in law talked to him. If he persists then they will be called.

Hobbyhorse, I wish Becca would stand up to him face to face but she will not do that. She will stand in the same room with him if she has to, like at the vice principals office but she won't even say what he did with him standing there. She will only say it with him not being present. I am not going to put her in the awkward situation of all sitting down, no matter how friendly, for a talk, when she is not comfortable with that.


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## susanne (Nov 24, 2010)

No matter what else you do, Becca needs help boosting her self confidence. She needs to learn to stand up for herself now and as an adult.

I would suggest a) self defense classes, b) counseling, c) an activity outside of school, where she can establish her sense of pride and self-respect away from those who are currently doing everything to drag her down. Dance, swimming, art, music, science camp -- the opportunities are endless.

A great deal of attention is being paid these days to bullying at school, but it does not stop there...it continues into adulthood for those who don't learn that they have the power to stand up for themselves. Spouses, family, "friends," coworkers, bosses, neighbors, police officers -- many people will take advantage of those who are unable to stand up for themselves.

Trust me, Amanda -- I have no doubt your husband loves his daughter, but Ashley is correct that he MUST let her know that this WILL NOT CONTINUE, because even worse than the bullying is having the adults in her life appear not to support her. Notice that I say "appear." In a case like this, appearances are as important as (or more important than) reality.

I've joked about my phobia of thistles, but when I was four and my brothers and sisters tortured me with them, my parents LAUGHED. It wasn't the thistle torture that hurt -- it was the the sense of betrayal when my parents didn't stand up for me.


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## wade3504 (Nov 25, 2010)

We are going to put her and her brother in a karate class. We were doing that before, not for the self defense, even though that helps, but for the confidence building and foccusing. Becca doesn't have a focus problem but our son does and it affects his school work. She is in a drama club at school where she is learning to stand up in front of people and speak so she is making progress. We had her in a Girl's United group but some teacher at her school decided to reccommend her for reading enrichment. For those who need it it's a nice word for reading tutoring. She's got some of the best grades in all of her 5th grade (part of an award she's getting for being a role model at school and her good grades, only 4 fifth graders are getting it), so what I think they are doing is trying to up the scores even higher of the kids who can help them pass the FCAT as they are a "C" school. So, even though we didn't want her in it she is still not allowed in her club as it falls on the same day. I was peeved. They wouldn't change their mind about it or tell me who the teacher was who did it. She's got the highest grades you can get without going beyond what someone in her grade level should know.

I used to be like her but even worse. I was just extremely shy plus I just let people walk alll over me. It wasn't really bullying just in general. I finally decided one day that I didn't like that me and I am totally different now. I am not afraid to stand up for myself or say what I need to say. I am not the people pleaser I once was always worried about making everyone happy as that is just not possible. So I am working with Becca and I am going to have her see a counselor as well and not the ones at school as they are useless-"Sure you can come back to us if they do anything at home" and when she does, "we can't do anything as it didn't happen as part of a school function." So she got up the nerve to tell them and then they do nothing. The best part is that the couunselor and vice principal have been talking with me this whole time. Now that it's getting hotter and I am not dropping it they've decided since I am not on the list of people that they can talk to at the school regarding Becca and John (only my husband and his mother are as he hadn't changed it yet), that they can't talk to me. So we are fixing that on Monday and I will have permission to do anything involving them. So they got a couple of days off but it's not over.

I did find out that we can make a complaint about this kid with the apartment complex rental company. I guess there is a policy where you can say it is unsafe living conditions for whomever in your family. If this family has more than one complaint they will be the ones who will be asked to leave and we won't have to. If it comes down to it I will make a request to get out of our lease so that we may leave. We planned on it after our lease was up anyway to go live closer to my work and a much better school system.


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## Sonya (Nov 25, 2010)

While she may need more self confidence to stand up for herself in certain circumstances, things are not like they used to be. Yes, we may have gotten our bras snapped, etc, but kids are not the same now. Kids are more violent, more troubled IMO, many do not know how to handle their emotions so they do so with violence/dominence. 25-30 years ago there were not guns in schools for the most part, etc...yes there was bullying/fighting, but it never usually escaliated to the point it does today, so many suicides, etc... I won't get into my opinion on why things are this way, because it doesn't matter. I know this is a hard situation and I do think you and your husband are doing the best you can. Good luck.


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## ~Lisa~ (Nov 25, 2010)

Wow pretty harsh to assume or even say her father does not care about her.

Sometimes people do not look at the whole picture and while yes I am sure he did not tell her it is not a big deal going to the police is not a end all to any situation.

Sometimes it does nothing more then escalate a situation and often times it takes more then a person saying such and such happened until they can do something.

It is a personal choice and one with consequences either way. I surely would never say a parent does not love their child simply for not going to the police about something like this just yet.

Off topic but it is very simular to those that tell a battered women well just get a restraining order- sounds great but last I heard a peice of paper did not protect against fists, bullets, knives rape ect... Often times things like this are just not simple to solve and do have to be thought out carefully. Of course being a parent we want to protect our kids but sometimes protecting them is doing just what the OP is doing going thru all their options and being very aware of the situation and making educated decisions on a time line they feel works best.


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## Sue_C. (Nov 25, 2010)

> it is very similar to those that tell a battered women well just get a restraining order- sounds great but last I heard a piece of paper did not protect against fists, bullets, knives rape etc... Often times things like this are just not simple to solve and do have to be thought out carefully.


I was thinking to the effect that it would be on paper...something to follow through on if it DOES escalate. To not report it, means if these kids do something again, to some other kids even...this won't be seen on their records, and the next time too, nothing will be written/reported. How many times will that happen, before they have done something "worth" reporting?

Just thinking "out loud".


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## ~Lisa~ (Nov 25, 2010)

Sue I agree and my advice earlier in the thread was to perhaps file a report on the sexual aspect going on here.

But when someone said they do not care about this girl for not filing a report I just thought I would point out that it is not always the right choice and it can escalate things is all..


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## Marty (Nov 25, 2010)

OK I want to tell you all my reasoning behind some of what I have said: When we moved here my boys were little 1st and 2nd graders and considered outcasts. Heck, they couldn't even understand not only the kids with the southern slang and thick accent, and their "slang sayings" but they couldn't even get through the accent of some of the teachers it was that bad and frankly and honestly neither could I.

Michael was very little for his age. He got beat up all the time. He'd get off the school bus daily with his clothing torn and bruises. Do you think I just sat here? I was in the Principal's office, talking to the parents, and appeared in front of the school board and was dismissed as "boys will be boys". I only made it worse for him and I didn't know what to do. It escalated over the years then finally one day in 5th grade I got a call Michael was hurt bad. Seems a bunch of big kids thought it was funny to stuff him inside a locker, padlock it and leave him there and he couldn't breathe and paramedics were called. Again reports were made that went no where but the bottom line is we ended up having to purchase land in an adjoining county so we could legally move my kids to a different school system off this mountain and out of this county completely.

That summer a bunch of the mountain kids from his former school started showing up around here when they noticed we got a swimming pool and they decided to "take it over" from my kids and I wasn't sure how we'd handle it worrying about reprisal what they would do if I threw them out of here. Well, Michael was very wise for his young age and wise way before his time. He didn't run away into the house for nothing. He ran into the house for food to bring out to feed them all. He took groceries out on trays, lunch meat a loaf of bread, drinks, cookies, you name it and welcomed them. He told them he wanted them to swim in his pool and have fun with him but warned them never to hurt his little brother. Protecting Dan was his main concern. He sat with them all at our picnic table over food and I don't know what was said to this day but there was a lot of laughter. All I did was lay the basic ground rules, no pushing, drowning anyone, be sure your parent's know you are here etc. and that was the end of it. I had a ton of kids here every day ever since. These friendships lasted for years and still now and my boys became popular with everyone. In hindsight, too bad these kids couldn't have been able to talk it out back in the early days of school. It kinda reminds me of Thanksgiving when the Pilgrims sat down and shared with the Indians.

There's a lesson in here somewhere.

I cannot tell you how much loved by all these kids Michael was till the day he died. What I am trying to tell you all is you need to give the opportunity for kids to become friends and as John Lennon would say "Give Peace a Chance"

I just wanted to share this.


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## Sonya (Nov 26, 2010)

Marty while I agree somewhat with the approach you all took in your situation. I think this situation is extremely different in the fact that it is boy harrassing girl. I still find it disturbing that he grabbed her breast (to me that suggests a sexual assault, and yes boys around the same age as these boys have raped before, google it). I just hope the little ^&*# has wised up and will leave her alone now.


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## Ashley (Nov 26, 2010)

Well its been proven that talking to the kids did nothing, so waiting to do soemthing more is pretty much showing how much he cares. IF the kid is already sexually assulting her(which he is) hes not going to just stop there on his own.

I stand by my original statements. I am in a relationship with somebody who had a rough childhood, whos parents did nothing when she went to them. I know what kind of damage that gets done to a person, even after almost 35 years she isnt the same and there will always be issues.

The little girl is loseing her childhood. You posted before about her messy habits and other things you didnt like. Ever think this is her way of acting out about stuff she dont know how to deal with especially when she isnt getting the help she needs to fix the problem?


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## susanne (Nov 26, 2010)

I don't question his love for his daughter, but in a case like this, perceptions can be more potent than reality. If she perceives him as not caring, not believing her, or not protecting her, she will still be hurt. A parent can love their child to pieces yet not realize how much a given situation hurts them.

You mentioned before that he's not really the touchy-feely sort, but could he take her out for a drive and talk and tell her that he might not express himself well, but he will always listen to her and always be there for her. Even if this is awkward and uncomfortable, it would mean the world to her.

Those school administrators are blithering idiots, and if they are indeed holding her back to help their ratings, you need to get both kids to a different school in a different district. This is unconscionable. A principal who would allow this would be all too likely to brush a sexual assault aside to protect his/her school's reputation. I understand not wanting her to miss the trip, but I'd at least start the process of transferring them to a new school.

I agree 100% with those who have said grabbing a breast IS SEXUAL ASSAULT, not boyish teasing.

In addition to helping Becca, has the school considered that a boy that young grabbing a girl's breast NEEDS SERIOUS HELP? Hello -- *this boy is a sexual predator in training.* If nobody acts, they are enabling and, in fact, encouraging him. For this reason if none other, I would report this to the police. Having his victim's grandmother give him a stern lecture isn't going to help one bit.

As for the boy's family getting evicted if enough people complain, this could be a VERY good thing, as he *might* see that his actions have hurt his family, and they *might* take this issue seriously.

I'd be very curious to know if he has assaulted or bullied anyone else, or if he has been in any other trouble?

Amanda, I feel so strongly for Becca, and I'm so glad to hear that she and her brother are taking martial arts classes, as well as the other activities. You are a great mother and I empathize with your position as new member of the family. Keep fighting!


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