# Mares or Geldings



## drivin*me*buggy (Feb 11, 2011)

A reply to another post got me to thinking about my 2 horses, a gelding and a mare, and the differences in working them. SO I thought I'd start this topic for some winter discussion....

My gelding, Buck, is my boy. He is so full of try and will always give it his best, whatever I ask. He never quits on me or says 'no'. He may say 'what are you asking, I don't get it? but will try something. When doing something like lungeing- he will start off like Whee!!!- then like ok, focus. What's mom want? And he is just FUN! And he will offer behaviors in hand- trying to guess what I want. He is a loyal fella.

My mare, Wish, is the more gifted athlete, and is a sweetie. Teaching her is different than Buck. Hard to put my fingers on just the right words to describe the bond though. SHe will try, but is a bit more tentative, wanting to get it right, but not wanting to make a mistake. WHen she gets it, she is a bit of a show off it feels like to the other horses. In our last lungeing sessions before the big freeze, we were working on extending the trot. SHe'd watch me work Buck first then I take her. We'd warm up and then I'd ask her to extend and she'd turn it on and swear you could feel her energy say to Buck-Like this, dummy. LOL SHe is a snugglebug after she's been worked- like she is enjoying that bonding time.

So maybe some of this sounds crazy- but it is what I have experienced and wondered if anyone else notices any of these kind of differences?

Angie


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## Knottymare (Feb 11, 2011)

The differences I've noticed between mares and geldings (and men and women




) is that women



mares have the emotional cycles that are fairly quick and fairly predictable. Some more obvious than others in how apparent it is, but still, pretty cyclical. Most of my mares, if they are "marish" have had a quick fuse, shorter attention span and have been more dramatic in their expression than my geldings. My geldings (remind me of hubby) are more broody when they are upset, have longer swings, can be total clowns but can also have mood swings.

I have always enjoyed mares more than geldings as a general rule... I guess I can relate to them!


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## Relic (Feb 11, 2011)

Okie dokie the preferance here for driving is stallions mares and geldings in that order. Stallions don't fool around they seem to put there nose to whatever is expected when working...mares can be a pain there smart but some days omg it's like they look at you with that you can't make me attitude..geldings which we are very new to seem to just mop along and do whats asked without to much complaining..


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## Shari (Feb 11, 2011)

Maggie always does her best and loves her cart, she will pout if I don't take her out for awhile.

I have never driven her around geldings and I am not sure I want too.


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## RhineStone (Feb 11, 2011)

Having "ambitious" geldings and "plodding" mares as well as the reverse, I would say that it totally depends on the actual personality of the horse. Mares seem to "test" you more until they understand that YOU are alpha and not the reverse.

I've only had one stud, and he was a really "pleasing" personality, always trying to do what was right. We took him to a big exhibition one year and he was a peach. Most people didn't know he was a stud. In fact, the well-broke gelding and mare we took were complete pistols (spring fever in April) and since we took three horses, all three of us (my mom, 8 yr. old sister, and I) had to lead a horse. The stud was the best behaved of the three, so we gave the stud to my young sister to walk down to the arena and told her not to tell anyone he was a stallion. Not the most ideal situation, but it really was the safest plan.



He didn't squeal for four-days, but we pulled in the driveway after the show and he squealed his head off!





We cut him a few years ago and still have him. He is the smartest horse in the barn. He knows exactly when a gate is unlocked (I think he watches me) and will also know when I am setting up a different stall for him overnight (he likes to stay in when it is wet). I'll let him out of his stall and he beelines it for the other stall even though I don't tell him to go there. Too bad he doesn't have more leg for driving.

Myrna


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## Kelsey - Vandy's Farm (Feb 11, 2011)

I would always chose a mare or stallion over a gelding. I have driven them all but mares and stallions seem to have more spunk and showy attitudes which is fun to drive and great for the show ring. My geldings were all a bit wimpy



They did well too but I prefer my girls and studs. Of course each individual horse is different.


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## disneyhorse (Feb 11, 2011)

Having driven stallions, mares, and geldings... I'd say the INDIVIDUAL is the biggest factor. Geldings are widely known for being consistent, but that by no means equals ALL geldings are consistent or easier to deal with! I've driven hormonal mares, and mares that are more "gelding like." I've dealt with plenty of geldings that HAD been stallions for much of life and are just as unpredictable as they were when they were stallions.

I've had some stallions that are high strung and others that could be worked around mares with little problem.

It's not the gender, it's the horse itself.

Same could be said for my human co-workers





Andrea


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## drivin*me*buggy (Feb 11, 2011)

Maybe my question or thoughts on discussion weren't clear. I was getting ready to head out to feed so was in a hurry. It wasn't so much what do you prefer to drive, more like what to you notice in how they learn or how they develop a bond, so maybe I shouldn't even have included the mare /gelding thing, and made it ore about the relationship that you have developed with your horse.

I understand that alot of it comes down to individual personalities.

I recently read an interesting book called Ride the Right Horse:Understanding Equine Personalities and how to work with them. It was a really good read, and as I read it I could see my own horses appear in the descriptions. I recommend it to anyone looking to think deeper about how they work with their horses and how to relate to them based on their different personalities.

Angie


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## hobbyhorse23 (Feb 12, 2011)

I've read parts of that book and found it interesting but what I remember most from it was the section on _rider_ personality types.



Those seemed more accurate to me and I'll admit to having been foolishly pleased about which one I fit.





It is very interesting noting the different ways horses, whether male or female, learn. Kody is as smart as a whip and picks things up very quickly but he's also easily frustrated if he thinks he knows what I want and I'm not rewarding him for it. He's had to learn that if I'm not acknowledging a behavior it means he needs to change what he's trying as I'm apparently asking for something different than before. "Don't get frustrated, Kody, get creative!" He'll also hit roadblocks in his training that no amount of force or insistence is going to get you beyond. If you're dumb and try, he'll just blow up and become extremely angry and aggressive. That's his version of being defensive; he hates feeling misunderstood or inadequate and being pushed and reacts by blowing up.

I've been a late bloomer all my life and know what it feels like to simply not be ready for something so when we hit one of those roadblocks, whether it makes sense to me or not, we simply leave it for awhile and go on to something else. When he's ready he'll tell me and then he usually masters whatever it was in a day or less. Some horses experience brain freeze when they're scared but Kody gets it when he's frustrated. He simply stops thinking. If he were a little kid he'd have his fingers in his ears and be chanting "no, no, NO, NO NONO*NONONO*!!!" at the top of his lungs. The only effective way to handle him when he gets like that is to calmly wait it out and go "Hey! Hello? What are you making such a fuss about? I'm over here with a goodie and as soon as you calm down and join the real world again we can laugh about this." He's gotten to an age now where you can see he feels sort of sheepish about those episodes when they happen and he's much quicker to calm down and start thinking again. He prefers not to admit they happened!



He swishes his tail as if to say "Oh. Hmm. Uh, yeah. I know that. Nevermind" and comes and gets his goodie. Then we can start again on small simple steps he already knows.

Spyderman had lots of trauma issues and anxiety so training him was all about praise and encouragement and letting him know you were proud of him when he made an effort. If he thought you were upset he took it personally and was sure he'd done something to cause your negative emotions and would devolve into a spiral of anxiety until he'd be air pawing obsessively with one front hoof, gagging on the bit and be so locked up in his own mind he couldn't move. It was terrible! He was my first horse and it took me years to learn how to short-circuit that cycle effectively. The main thing that won him though was love. I loved him unconditionally, believed in him, and in return he tentatively gave me his trust and when I never betrayed it he began to believe I might never do so and stepped outside his comfort zone. I had to make a huge deal of those moments and praise him like he'd just won a World Championship because for him the accomplishment was nearly as big. He wanted so badly to please me but was terrified he'd do the wrong thing. It broke my heart when I realized the depths of his pain.

Turbo by comparison to those two is paragon of simplicity.



The main thing with him is that he wasn't a naturally confident yearling so I had to take a different tact and spend some time fostering his sense of security and engagement. He was a defensive kicker, used to being on the bottom of the heap, and punishing him for turning his butt to you just got you kicked with escalating alarm and fervor. When addressing the behavior itself didn't work I focused on the root of the problem and spent a lot of time playing learning games that brought out his personality and got him interested and thinking and as his self-confidence grew, the urge to kick went down. I was very proud of him last summer as a two year old stallion when a little girl ran up behind him at a show with a yell and he visibly controlled his impulse to kick. Boy did he get praised for that! Other than that issue training him has been a snap. He's every bit as smart as Kody but without that resistant edge; instead he prefers to observe things and think things through and then when he tries it he does so with a fair degree of confidence. He's the kind that wanders into a pile of obstacles or pipes or fencing and gets thoroughly stuck then stands there waiting patiently for someone to get him out. And if you don't, he'll just ponder the best course of action, come up with a plan and then calmly extricate himself from the situation.

He's still prone to impatience (hello, he's a two year old colt!) and sometimes gets nippy and challenging but we've learned to communicate and work together. I'll do exercises to slow him down and recenter him in his body and it's really fun to see the light come on as he becomes aware of his hind end and center of balance. He learned really fast about stepping up under himself and moving laterally and it gave him a lot of pride. He shows it off at every opportunity now!

Leia


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## Sandee (Feb 12, 2011)

I totally agree with those that said it all depends on the individual horse but then it also depends on the handler (driver). Of my three I prefer my mare as she never refuses me and gives her all at every task.; where as my stallion and gelding are on the lazy side.

However, last year at Nationals, I let my daughter drive my mare (which she hadn't done often) and my sweet "never give me a bit of trouble" mare ran away with her. They come out of the arena; I take the reins; mare blows one little fit and finds out it's me now and suddenly she sweet and compliant.


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## RhineStone (Feb 12, 2011)

disneyhorse said:


> Same could be said for my human co-workers






:rofl


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## Molly's Run Minis (Mar 13, 2011)

i'm with mares all the way!! neither of my girls change their personalities during their heats and out of all the geldings i've had(4 so far) i've never had as strong a bond as i do now with my girls('specially Misty) as for working, my gelding is so lazy he drives everyone mad! he drags his feet when leading and you sometimes have to drag him to where you wanna go and, honestly, he's not the sharpest mini in the pen



i'd take girls over boys any day!!


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## susanne (Mar 13, 2011)

Molly's Run, you have simply shown why each horse needs to be judged as an individual.

Your gelding may be a deadhead, but Mingus is a livewire. If you could have seen the Oregon State Fair a few years back, where I had Mingus, Leia had Kody, and Liz (Nootka) had Mouse, and all were trash-talking each other, you wouldn't make any assumptions about geldings!

The great thing about each of these three horses is that, while they have an abundance of energy, each knows his job and keeps his mind where it belongs.

I have one of each -- gelding, stallion, and mare -- and each has a unique, wonderful personality.


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## Molly's Run Minis (Mar 13, 2011)

susanne said:


> Molly's Run, you have simply shown why each horse needs to be judged as an individual.
> 
> Your gelding may be a deadhead, but Mingus is a livewire. If you could have seen the Oregon State Fair a few years back, where I had Mingus, Leia had Kody, and Liz (Nootka) had Mouse, and all were trash-talking each other, you wouldn't make any assumptions about geldings!
> 
> ...



i was judgeing my veiw of geldings from the 4 i had, all of them were lazy and horrible, except for one that tried to kill my mom(reared up on her in the trailer, he was the only one that wasnt lazy. lucky he was very short or he could've seriously injured her!) i, honestly, havent met a reliable mini gelding yet in my life. i know they exist, but one hasnt come into my life yet and as of now, my personal preference is mares.


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## hobbyhorse23 (Mar 13, 2011)

susanne said:


> If you could have seen the Oregon State Fair a few years back, where I had Mingus, Leia had Kody, and Liz (Nootka) had Mouse, and all were trash-talking each other, you wouldn't make any assumptions about geldings!
> The great thing about each of these three horses is that, while they have an abundance of energy, each knows his job and keeps his mind where it belongs.


Kody says "Thank you, Susanne." Lord knows that little red corvette is a handful!



Don't forget Pyro was at that show too, and every bit as amped as the others.



Turbo has joined the ranks of the gelded and while he's losing some of that edge that was so fun, so far he's still my hyper little boy. I actually miss all the rearing and playing they got up to though!



Now he just runs.

Some people get along better with one gender than another. I personally feel more comfortable with males, be they human or four-legged. I have female BFF's, female cats and dogs and get along with the mares I've driven, but I naturally gravitate toward the boys for permanent equine partners and really enjoy working with them. There's just something so straight-forward and honest about the good ones! Other people feel the same way about females and that's fine too.





Leia


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