I really need some prayers and good thoughts

[targetsmom]

I was away for the weekend and only just saw this thread. Jill, I am so sorry to hear you are going through this. I know the waiting feeling and it is the pits!! I am glad you got your appointment moved up. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Go out and hug your minis! When I went through something similar a few years ago my minis were a HUGE source of comfort.

 

[Hosscrazy]

Jill, sweetie, you know we are here for you... you have a lot of friends and a lot of support. You're gonna be just fine --- you are such a strong person and I just know you'll be okay... take a deep breath, and hug all those fur friends of yours...

Liz R.

 

[joyenes]

Jill, I just came across this post and I just wanted to say all my prayers are heading your way. You are a strong women and I know everything is going to turn out well for you. Best wishes and hugs. Joyce

 

[Maxi'sMinis]

Keeping you in my prayers and sending calming thoughts.

http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/candle...eng&gi=Jill

I have started a candle group for you Jill to help keep those prayers and positive thoughts coming your way.

Please lite a candle for Jill.

 

[Jill]

Thanks a lot, everyone, again

It helps a lot to know that my friends and family both are pulling for me to be okay.

This morning's pretty good. Maybe not as good as yesterday morning but part of yesterday morning's "good" was the surprise that I woke up not feeling so much like wallowing in the fear. I am not into wallowing this morning, either. I took my Xanax as soon as I could, so I can take it again later in time for a nap (naps help). So hopefully between that and just generally working through some emotions, it will be okay today, too.

Tomorrow, my parents are having my sister's boys over for a "pool party" (kiddie pool) with special decorated cupcakes (my mom could be on a tv show for the fancy cakes and cookies she decorates), pizza, etc. I am thinking of going over there, but on the other hand, I don't want to be outside "too much" in the heat and H doesn't want me to either. I've not been told to avoid it but the air quality in this humidity is really bad. If there's something serious with my lung, maybe a/c is best? But I'll think on it and discuss it with H. Of course, if I go, my own boys and girls (dogs) will think we shoulda just had a pool or tv party HERE vs. me going out to one

I would imagine as Friday gets closer, I'll get more worked up about seeing the pulmonologist. I have to pick up my pictures and report from the hospital on the way but it will be on CD (my request -- I do NOT want to see any of this vs. a doctor telling me. I don't know enough about it and will only be in tears regardless of what an informed eye would see.).

Jill

 

[drivin*me*buggy]

Thinking of you Jill. Hoping that all of this gets put behind you soon.

Angie

 

[user 488]

Hey Jill! I have been on the road for the last few days and thinking of you! I also feel this will turn out positive and so glad you will be getting some kind of answers on Friday. It is the waiting that really could make even a well person sick. I think once a strong person like you knows what is going on they then just learn how to deal with it. I hope you know what I mean. It's the unknown that is so totally stressful.

Stay positive! Again....this IS going to be OK!

Carol

 

[StarRidgeAcres]

Jill,

Just saw this post. Sorry, I just don't come here that often anymore, but wish I had seen this sooner.

Jill, as others have said, you are so strong and have such a beautiful spirit, I just feel deep down that this is going to be OK. That YOU are going to be OK. My prayers and thoughts are with you.

Hugs to you!

Parmela

 

[WhiteTailsMinis]

Jill - everyone here is thinking of you and hoping for speedy results to ease your mind. I'm sure things will turn out fine but it's understandable to be consumed with worry. Don't these doctors realize what the wait does to people?

With all the prayers from this forum behind you - and the wonderful family support you have - things can only get better!

Keep us posted and we'll all celebrate with you when you get the good news!

I'm confident it will all turn out fine.

 

[nootka]

You know my thoughts are with you....I can't imagine what you're going through.

Liz

 

[Buckskin gal]

Jill, Good thoughts and prayers coming from here also.

I was diagnosed with cancer eight months ago and if there is anything I have learned from the experience is that I can't control having cancer but I can sure control how I deal with it. Even though it is third stage cancer I have lived as if I am going to be cured. Each day is a treasure and so I feel that each day I must use it for doing something good and enjoying the day as much as I can. Keeps me from having time to dwell on the desease. So many people with a life threatening desease ask "why me??" As I look around I have asked myself "why not me" for I am not any better than others who have to deal with the same. We are strong and we do have choices to make and therefore I have chosen to get the most out of each day. I hope you too make the decision to really " live" and enjoy what you have for we are all lucky to have those things. For me, each flower and each bird are enjoyed for their beauty and I see them so much better than before I had cancer. I think you have a very good chance of not having cancer but regardless of what it is, I am sure you will face it like a trooper. I have had 8 months of cancer treatment and looking forward to the day when I can say "I am cured!!!!" We do have to thank God for making it possible for us to live at a time when so much has been done towards the treatment of cancers. Give those wonderful animals of yours some extra attention for they really are a good treatment for the worries we may have.

Mary

 

[Jill]

Thank you everyone so much for the good thoughts and prayers. It helps a lot. I'm trying to stay distracted as possible but am in much better spirits than I was the first few days when I kept crying, wallowing, etc. Haven't done that the past couple of days but I am sure that I will be a nervous wreck on Friday morning! I just hope that I can keep it fairly together over the weekend and that the biospy will be soon so we can find out what we need to deal with and start dealing with it strongly.

 

[IloveMiniatureshorses]

Millions of

to you!!!!

 

[shane]

oh Jill {{{{HUGS}}}}}} to you , my friend, im so sorry you have this to worry about,

my thoughts and prayers are with you

stay strong xx

 

[Matt73]

Just saw this, Jill! I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I'll think positive thoughts for you. You do the same for you, too!

 

[Jill]

Thanks, again, folks. Your wishes and prayers help a lot.

Today, I'm doing okay emotionally (haven't felt bad physically ever from whatever's going on).

H may be coming home early, too, which would be very very VERY good for my spirits...

Whenever he does come home, he's bringing home four fancy goldfish for this tank I set up and have been letting it wait / stabilize. Of all things to fixate on, but the fish are doing the trick for me. I'd shown him in the petstore prior what kind I wanted and sent pics to his cell phone this morning. I tell you -- there are real benefits to being able to easily distract yourself!!!

I'm scared about the pulmonologist appointment tomorrow. I think she'll examine me and schedule the biopsy. I just hope she doesn't have words that will inflate my fears beyond where they already are, and I hope the biospy can be done VERY soon.

ALSO, I wish I weren't such a scatter brain. I can't remember if I took my xanax... I suspect I did not, even though I stopped what I'd been doing specifically to go take it but I got side tracked. SO, waiting a bit until it would be okay to take a "2nd" (probable 1st) dose.

 

[Firefall]

Sending you warm fuzzy thoughts and well wishes.

Enjoy the fish!

 

[Sterling]

Keep thinking those good thoughts Jill..and filling your aquarium! Know that I will be thinking about you tomorrow and you are in my prayers.

 

[Linda K]

Hi Jill,

I am just seeing this, as Mickie and I have been gone on a motorcycle trip. We went through New York, New Hampshire, Vermont, Maine and then went into Canada and Nova S. We have been gone about 17 days. This sure isnt somthing I like seeing when I get home...............

But I lit a candle for you and wanted you to know that Erica and I are thinking of you and wishing nothing but the best. I am so glad you have "H", and of course the forum so you can talk about how your feeling. I think talking helps. I just know everything is going to be just fine with you. If you need to talk , cry, whatever..... know you can call anytime. 870-668-3369.

Stay positive and keep us informed. We will be praying for nothing but good results

Linda Killion

 

[Jill]

My pulmonologist appointment today. She'll look at my pictures (which she also reviewed with my referring doctor last weekend when they were on call), examine me and schedule the biopsy, I assume. Hoping she'll tell me something that will help me worry less, but not really expecting that to happen (hoping hoping). Harvey, of course, is taking me. I'm not as jello jointed worried as I thought I'd be but that will probably kick in before long.

So, please pray and hope for reassuring information for me this morning. And this makes post #100 to this thread. I'm obsessive about "coordination" of things and figure 100 is a nice, round, lucky number for this post to hit upon?