Is anyone else somewhat "concerned" about this trend?

[nootka]

Just wondering if anyone else feels that this celebrity trend of adopting a child from Africa or whereever the "locale du jour" might be is possibly getting out of hand?

What was Madonna thinking? That boy has a father there in that village. I don't have any idea what the quality of life would be for children that she would have, but this boy's been removed from his culture, his roots and his village as well as any relatives he has.

Couldn't she have found a better way to make a difference? Does it almost seem like there is a desperate need being filled, or some publicity stunt? Maybe it's just a media slant that makes me feel that way.

What's up w/Jolie and her adopting/having kids so quickly? I know she's got a fairly bad relationship w/her father, but wow...her and the "Pitt" have really gone to a new level w/the annoyance factor anyway.

I hope for the best outcome for all, but it seems that small dogs have been put aside as the "must have" and now it is young children from third world countries. My dad was observing, sort of jokingly/wryly, maybe they are saying, "Does this child match my purse?"

Not trying to sound bitter about it, just thinking there may be better ways to handle this and I hope that boy can maintain contact with his family. I see his dad seems to be backpedalling so maybe she will let the boy go home at least part of the time.

I also try to keep my distance from celebrity goings-on, but there are so many who can't think for themselves, that others will be attempting the same thing to "look cool/generous/kind/whatever".

Liz

 

[Miniv]

I also distance myself from the goings on and gossip regarding celebrities......

As for the adoption thing with Madonna, I don't know what to think. You are right, that she is taking the little boy away from his language and his culture. But there are a lot of couples here in the U.S. who have adopted children from other countries successfully and happily too....... And yes, she also used her money and influence to rush an adoption through...... Those of us who had to go through adoptions in the normal fashion feel a bit resentful about that.

I'm personally just sitting and watching how all of that plays out....... Hate to say it, but the bio-father may just be waiting for enough money. The little boy was turned over to an orphanage, afterall.......and the man didn't squawk until the media got involved.

MA

 

[nootka]

You're right, MA. I also wonder about how awful it would be to in fact be so stalked by people wanting to know your business, etc. so maybe things just appear to be worse than they are.

I know raising a child is a challenge anyway, and many of these kids born to celebs have difficulties from the get-go from the circumstances and then to add having been adopted to a foreign culture (it would be culture shock for ME to go into that kind of life, let alone someone like these little ones being taken in), so again another issue to address/tend to.

I know it works a lot of the time, but the ones I've known that have done this are very attentive to the child's needs and go out of their way to help them adjust and keep their culture alive in some way, keep that connection.

So, yeah, we watch and wait and hope for the best.

Liz

 

[susanne]

They should have the same opportunity to adopt, no more, no less.

However, rather than takimg just one child out of poverty into extremely wealth and privilege, wouldn't it be better if they could use their money to adopt a family or an entire village, so that many could benefit from this largess? Actually, I think I remember someone doing this...

Even for an orphan, a foreign adoption is a mixed blessing, as they will likely never know their birth home or any distant relatives who may be too impoverished to adopt them, but are family nonetheless.

 

[Lisa-Ruff N Tuff Minis]

well here is my take on it.. first off no one knows how much they do or don't give to other communites so perhaps they do plenty and we just dont know it.

I think bottom line is this is one child who will have a much better life then he would have.. his own father seemed to feel so- and if his own father was willing to "sell" him like some claim well then all the more reason for him to be somewhere else

taking them away from family, culture ect well that happens here in the US on a daily basis with adoptions and 99 percent of the time the kids are MUCH better off

I think culture shock can happen almost as equally when you take a foster child who has been living in poverty and fear from abusive parents to a nice neighberhood with a quiet loving family.

That is the great thing about kids all in all they are quite adaptable especially when there lives change for the better.

 

[CountryHaven]

Well, my personal stance on it is this, I have no idea what the real situation is. What we read in the papers and such concerning people and events like that are rarely the entire story, if even half-way accurate in what they do say (which is questionable as well).

 

[disneyhorse]

Well... I just don't know. On one hand, maybe it's good to get adoption into the public eye. This certainly does the trick!

I know it's not the ''perfect'' situation or solution for the kids, but it's a WHOLE lot better for them, and it must be well-meant!

I actually do not like children very much... but I have a huge soft spot for those orphan Chinese girls. Maybe someday...

Andrea

 

[runamuk]

I really don't care what the "stars" do.......as for foreign adoption I am really confounded...there are many kids in the US who need homes BUT the system here makes a no strings adoption nearly impossible. Foreign adoptions although they have plenty of rules once you are accepted you just cough up the $30,000 + and you get your kid no bio parents to worry about, no relative interference etc......

I am not trying to say either is right or wrong but somewhere along the way adoption has become less about kids and families and more about money and politics

:

: and I think the media attention caused by the stars only makes this worse. I do know Angelina Jolie has done tons of charity work and paid for major life improvements in several small villages so some are doing good works.

but I have a huge soft spot for those orphan Chinese girls. Maybe someday...Andrea

Well if you decide to go that route my friend is working on her second china adoption...she is familiar with the in's and outs.......you have to be cautious though as many of the children have serious issues.

 

[Pepipony]

Adoption is fine as long as its for the right reasons and not for publicity or because its 'The thing' to do. Madonna, well, if she knew the child had a father there its one thing, but at the same time he DID drop the child off at an orphanage. Maybe he 'knows' who she is and is playing this up for a payout.

I get that they will loose part of their culture, but, Anjelina Jolie brings her kids back to their homeland to learn, so hopefully, others will follow. At the same time when our forefathers moved to America they kind lost their heritage in a sense, as well. Course, being adults is different than a child, I get that.

Guess I think its kinda nice to see even one child given a better life than they ever could dream of. I do think that if these people did adopt american babies/kids, somehow, someway the birth parents would figure out whats up and jump in, for a payout.

Now if Paris wanted to adopt...........

:

 

[rabbitsfizz]

Paris would need to find a baby that fitted in her handbag first!!!

As I understand it by bringing the baby back to the UK she has now to go through all the adoption procedure of the UK and cannot take the baby out until it is satisfied.

The father, of course, is now saying he did not know the baby was being adopted- it is possible he did not he does not speak English- he put the baby in the orphanage because his wife had died and he had to work to feed the other kids- a baby was too much responsibility.

I do actually think he intended to get the baby back eventually.

Madonna is supposed to be building a new orphanage in the village- The Madonna Foundation- I am not sure why she wanted a black baby- is her partner black??

Maybe it just goes with her clothes??

Who knows??

http://www.google.co.uk/url?q=http://abcne...EugQAfrNryPEwY=

 

[kaykay]

the article i read said the father had previously put the baby in the orphanage after his mother died and the father had no money for food. BEFORE madonna went there. This man had already lost another baby due to starvation and said he couldnt bear to watch it happen again. In this article he also said he fully understood the adoption etc. His family were the ones that said he didnt and they suspect they were paid to say it. Madonna did agree to bring him back to this country for visits and so that he doesnt lose his history etc. It also said other americans have adopted from this village just not famous ones like madonna

rabbit her hubby is white but i dont know why that makes any difference?

 

[rabbitsfizz]

I was trying to rationalise a white person particularly adopting a black child- it is not generally allowed here, under our "unofficial" adoption rules a black or mixed race child would only be put with a black or mixed race family. even for fostering.

 

[Cronewolf]

People who can afford it should adopt where they can. It is made much too hard in this country to adopt.

I WANTED TO WHEN I was much younger. But I didn't own my own house. Then there was a long waiting list

Next by the time I waited the 2 years to just get on the waiting list I would be too old [40] to adopt. So since I couldn't have a baby I would never get one. I've often thought that instead of all the welfare mommas out there who get pregnant just to keep a check coming in after their second, put the rest up for adoption.

 

[Pandora]

I was trying to rationalise a white person particularly adopting a black child- it is not generally allowed here, under our "unofficial" adoption rules a black or mixed race child would only be put with a black or mixed race family. even for fostering.

Wow, here in the states there is alot of interracial adopting. For adopting in the states, white babies are hard to come by, so alot of couple will adopt african-american babies. And ALOT of couples adopt outside the US, like from China, Africa etc. It is so commonplace here I guess I was also confused on what you said.

and for fostering, it goes the same. There are more african-american than white kids, though there are both, so alot of mixing of races there too.

It is not uncommon to go out shopping and see a family of mixed raced kids anymore.

And as far as Madonna, she did say she was thinking a couple years of adopting. I think the media has interefered way too much. She was trying to do a good thing and now the press is using the father to make her look bad.

 

[bfogg]

Love.security,kindness,contentment hopefully have no language or racial barriers I don't care if the child is red green or polka dotted or if the parents are ditch diggers or billionaires,all I would consider important is do they have the right "stuff" to give this child all of the above?

I would say these celebrities do as far as any of us can see. We really can't tell about biological parents either.

But I think most anyone who adopts wants whats best for their child. Who am I to decide whos okay and who is not just from looking in from the outside.

My daughter adopted 2 black children both from crack addicted alcoholic parents who willingly gave them up.

One was 9 months old and weighed 11 lbs. Because she also has C P.. it took over an hour to feed her and no one in the home she was in took the time or more probably had the time to feed her.

Donna was told she would never walk or talk, she does both. Because my daughter willed it! She taught her to sign right away and then worked hours walking and talking her. She will never be "right" but she is alive and goes to school and sure can dial the phone and can tell nana what she wants from santa pretty darn plain.

They both have more problems than I would ever deal with for 2 days let alone for a lifetime. I probably would have taken them back the second day..... :no:

But to Donna they are her life!! And she has pretty much given over her life to them.

They do know their heritage but mostly they know security and love.

So I figured anyone who wants to adopt to better a childs life go for it.

 

[littledonkeys.com]

I will say only one thing about this. Madonna is a US Citizen, there are plenty of needy children that need adopting here......1ST

I can speak on this, I was adopted and so was my sister

 

[nootka]

I do know it is a good thing to give a needy child a home, and I wish I could do it, emotionally, but I have found I have so little patience for other people's children already, though who knows now that I feel I have grown so much in the past decades. We do have three boys and I've often thought about fostering, etc., just not right now with other issues in the family.

I am so much in awe of those that have the love and the care, the resources to give to those that don't especially children. I just feel in some cases there is much more going on than just that desire to give. I agree the media makes of it what they want, just also feel they are held up as examples and others will try to "do the same" for whatever reasons, not always the best ones.

Sad that such things happen to innocent ones, children and animals get used as tools for betterment against each other and for gain, be it public favor, etc.

I found it odd that Brad Pitt, Jolie's husband, said their next adoption would be from a country that "Mixed well with what they already had." I know it could be taken out of context, but what does that mean? Isn't it about the person, not where they are from? Guess I would put my foot in my mouth a million times if someone followed me around recording all that I ever said, but sheesh. I don't really like him or his wife, so I am biased that way. I am glad they do give to any organization at all, and have found the means to give some lucky children a lot of what they have to share. I hope things stay happy for them.

Liz

 

[Lisa-Ruff N Tuff Minis]

why she wanted a black baby- is her partner black??

Maybe it just goes with her clothes??

Who knows??

[

Wow that is a pretty harsh statment.. contrary to some beliefs there are MANY people out there who can actually love unconditionally no matter what color a person is.

Truth of the matter is there happens to be more babies then there are those of there culture able and willing to adopt so better they have a family even*gasp* one of a different race then living without a family at all IMO

I hear the argument why didnt she adopt in the US but then again there would be some unhappy that there isnt anyone helping out children in totally impoverishid countries.

one of those darned if you do darned if you dont situations.

Bottom line is it is very hard to say this childs life wont be better now then it would be in an orphanage and one child having a better life be it a US citizen or not.. should be the important part

 

[Frankie]

This is my 2 cents worth,

a ton of celebs are giving a ton of money to these poor countries and whose governments have no idea how to manage money as it seems to never improve.

there are a ton of people that would like to adopt, they can afford the day to day expense for a child, but can not afford the thousands upon thousands to adopt.

Instead of giving their money (celebs) to the government,,,,,,,,,,,,,give their money to 50 couples who would love to have a child, pay all the adoption expenses,,,,,,,,,and then that child has something to eat for a lifetime, instead of 60 days.

 

[littledonkeys.com]

I hear the argument why didnt she adopt in the US but then again there would be some unhappy that there isnt anyone helping out children in totally impoverishid countries.

one of those darned if you do darned if you dont situations.

The only idiots that would whine that she didnt adopt someone from an impoverished country are the way left PC crowd that live in a hypethetical world